Straight Line of the Day: Obamacare Is So Bad, It Would Be an Improvement to Replace It With…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Obamacare is so bad, it’d be an improvement to replace it with…

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  1. “it’d be an improvement to replace it with…”
    extreme prejudice.

    Hey! Where did all these protestors with pre-printed signs appear from? I swear, they misunderstood!

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  2. …prostate exams done by a tiny Geraldo Rivera and camera crew on live television.

    …all medical tests involve having Dexter examine your blood splatter.

    …waiting rooms that are just a bunch of naked people wearing rubber gloves with the lights turned off.

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    • “Who Wants To Bury A Millionaire?”

      “Reaping Up With The Kardashians”

      “Here Comes Intern Boo-Boo”

      “Salubrity Apprentice”

      “Underether Boss”

      “Scar Search”

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        • Maybe something for the “Who Gives a Crap Thursdays” line-up? I know, not reality shows

          “Scabs of Our Lives”

          “The Young and The Lifeless”

          “CHOPPED: Leper Colony Showdown”

          “Name that Lesion”

          “CSI: Why Bother”

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  3. …anything which isn’t patterned after the failing Social Security System being run like the Veterans Administration healthcare.

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  4. A blind monkey throwing a dart at a board with various diseases randomly written on the board. Wherever the dart hits that’s what you get treated for, but only after paying your seven thousand dollar deductible and waiting your mandatory three months to be seen by the doctor not of your choice.

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  5. Obamacare is so bad, it’d be an improvement to replace it with…

    more efficient death panels

    blood lettings

    actors portraying doctors actually performing your surgeries

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  6. smallpox

    visits to your state’s Department of Motor Vehicles

    interpretive readings of the lyrics to Bob Dylan songs

    a date with Lena Dunham

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    • Hmmm…I’ve been vaccinated for smallpox , I’ve survived the DMV, Bob Dylan’s not too bad, I’m married so I’ll weasel out of the last one. We may have winner. My kids will need the vaccine; a booster wouldn’t hurt me either.

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