Straight Line of the Day: 92% of CNN’s Airtime Is Spent Talking About Trump. The Other 8%…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

92% of CNN’s airtime is spent talking about Trump. The other 8%…

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  1. 92% of CNN’s airtime is spent talking about Trump. The other 8%…

    is showing photoshopped pictures of Trump

    showing the next wonderful thing that complete woman, Chelsea Clinton, did that day,

    listening to echoes in their minds.

    MOE.

    is spent on impeachment scenarios

    is spent talking about people talking about Trump.

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  2. 92% of CNN’s airtime is spent talking about Trump. The other 8%…

    is commercials, during which time they unsuccessfully attempt to wake up the cameraman.

    is advertising for their new show called Test Patterns, which although not having aired yet, is already their highest rated show

    is wondering aloud how they’re losing in the ratings to Joey reruns

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  3. . . . is spent denouncing Melania as a fashion-impaired wh0re who can barely speak English, and urging boycotts of stores which retail Ivanka Trump’s clothing and jewelry collections.

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  4. ….denying it.

    ….explaining why Hillary lost didn’t win but should have and really did win because she got the illegal popular ‘vote’ …in one state…or something.

    ….calling you a racist which doesn’t make much sense since you’re not watching.

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  5. …is a bunch of guys unwadding their panties when their screeching reaches an inaudible register.

    …sobbing, and snot rag wielding make-up persons frantically at work.

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    • One suspects you are from a generation no later than the Boomers. Referring to a handkerchief/tissue as a “snot rag” was a favorite expression of my father’s – still is, but I haven’t heard anyone else use it in decades.

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