Wednesday Night Open Thread

I used to enjoy watching Justified. If you never watched it, it might be worth a look. It’s on Amazon Prime at the moment, if you’re a Prime Membeer.

Anyway, Season Four had an interesting story about a skydiver, “Drew Thompson,” whose parachute didn’t open and he and his cocaine crashed to the ground in Kentucky in the 1980s.

In real life, in the 1980s, an Andrew Thornton had a parachute that didn’t open and he crashed to the ground before his plane crashed in Kentucky. The real life unsuccessful skydiver didn’t have cocaine on him. Rather, he had pushed it out of the plane earlier.

What happened to it? Therein lies a tale.

[The YouTube]

So, what’s on your mind? Got something you’d like to share? After all, it’s now Wednesday Night Open Thread.

Who wants to start?

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Nearly Perfect

After a very stupid NFL season, not a single player knelt during the National Anthem during the Super Bowl

Although Tom Brady did lay down in the 4th quarter.

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Also, Imagine Laundry Day

[Getting dressed in the 18th century – working woman] (Viewer #1,265,304)

I am so happy to be a 21st Century jeans-and-t-shirt man.

Also, how did they manage to not die of heat exhaustion in the summer?

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Link of the Day: I Could Barely Even Clear the First Screen

[High Praise! to Mental Floss]

9 Things You Might Not Know About Defender

Other trivia: If an alien blows up your ship, you get 25 points. If you die when you pop out of hyperspace (using the hyperspace button randomly kills you about 10% of the time), you score nothing.

Also, once you hit 1,000,000 points, your score rolls back over to zero. The highest score you can get is 999,975. If you get this and have any ships left, you need die in hyperspace.

I never got a max score, but – back in the day – I knew a 14 year old kid who could basically do this in his sleep.

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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Icebreaker: Seen Any Good Movies Lately You’d Recommend?

I found a list called “The 25 most popular icebreaker questions based on four years of data“. So I’m gonna post a few, and see what happens.

Your mission: answer the question in the comments with a good story.

If you don’t have a good story, you are encouraged to make one up.

Seen any good movies lately you’d recommend?

Yes, the Rankin-Bass animated “Return of the King” movie circa 1980. It gave the original Lord of the Rings trilogy story the same respect that Peter Jackson gave “The Hobbit“.

Also, you’ll never get the song “Where There’s a Whip, There’s a Way” out of your head.

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Some People Think Gun Buybacks Are a Great Idea

[High Praise! to Freedom Is Just Another Word]

Personally, I’m offended by this cartoon’s insensitive portrayal of Bewhiskered-Americans

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Straight Line of the Day: In a New ACLU-Backed Lawsuit, a Man Is Claiming He Has a Constitutional Right to…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

In a new ACLU-backed lawsuit, a man is claiming he has a constitutional right to

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The Illustrated Frank J: Occam’s Razor Explains the Trump Presidency

[title reference link]

[source]

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I Don’t Know. What WOULD You Call That?

The US Navy has deployed a prototype autonomous anti-submarine warfare vessel

Surprisingly, not named Subby McSubface

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Random Thoughts: Memo and Democracy

Yay! Got my first tax cut adjusted paycheck!
Now give me another tax cut.

I recorded the SOTU to watch later tonight. Please don’t spoil it for me.

So will the new Han Solo Star Wars movie cater to long time Star Wars fans or will it share the opinion of The Last Jedi that die hard fans of Star Wars are to be hated and punished?
“I know: Let’s add to Han Solo’s backstory that he’s a pedophile. That will teach Star Wars fans for ever loving anything.”

Are we to the point now that democracy–this constant win/lose contest everyone is dropped in–is more an obstacle to civilization than what’s lifting it up?
Democracy is definitely better than dictatorships or monarchies (which are stupid), but the way it pits us against each other in contests where there is a definitive victor and loser still seems rather primitive.
The idea that you can elect someone who 49% of the people voting despise is just dumb. And then we had Hillary vs. Trump where I think we exceeded 49% on both of them.
So why can’t the right and left work together? Because the system says they’re not supposed. One wins, one loses in each contest. Why would you work together with someone you’re supposed to be defeating?
No family works this way (at least no functional one). You certainly wouldn’t want to be having constant win/lose scenarios with your wife. And a country where people are constantly pitted against each other this way is going to have problems.
So what should we have instead of democracy? I dunno. But we should look for something. I’m frustrated that everyone’s solution always seems to be “We need to get more people out to vote!”–the same refrain we’ve had for decades (centuries?).
Voting is what got us Trump. Voting is what will one day get us worse than Trump. We need a new system. This one is broken and we need to stop pretending it will one day magically fix itself.

It does feel like a gag from a bad comedy that after the failure of uninspiring, status quo Hillary, the Dems drag out a Kennedy as their next big idea. I guess this is the sort of bad comedy where it’s plausible Donald Trump is president.

I’ve removed checking the news or social media from my mornings. I now drink my coffee while reading a book. Sometimes my 2yo gets up early and snuggles up next to me watching a show on an iPad while I read. It’s the greatest thing ever.

I could see hiring Alan Grayson if you had an opening for a crazed nutjob to bite homeless people, but I don’t know about fact-checking.

Shouldn’t they be middle-aged mutant ninja turtles by now?

Sometimes I wish we had that government from the X-Files that’s competent enough to do vast conspiracies.

Very interested in The Good Place season finale, but they may have set their finale bar too high with their first season.

I’m hearing something about a memo.

What if the memo is really long and none of us want to read it?

What if the memo says “The FBI is smart and doing everything right.”? That will be devastating to Trump!

What if the memo says something about me and it’s not flattering? Why did no one run the memo by me before releasing it?

I’m pretty much on board with getting rid of the Confederate statues, but I’m guessing the SJWs won’t stop there and next they’ll want to tear down a Harriet Tubman statue because she wasn’t good enough on trans issues or something.

My tax cut was bigger than $1.50 a week. But, you know, I pay a lot of taxes.
If you really want to give a big tax cut to poor people, cut payroll taxes.

It has to be said: I don’t think Putin is doing the worst job running this country.

People who say Obama didn’t have any scandals scare me even more than fervent Trump supporters.
In my ideal world, the president would always have a sub-20% approval rating and everyone would be suspicious anytime he tried to use his power.

The Democrats are right to attack Paul Ryan and I support their call for even more tax cuts.

I’m afraid the Democrats 2020 slogan is going to be, “Let’s all return to the depressing status quo that left you so numb and empty inside that you elected Trump president just to try and feel something again.”

Memo news cycles are so boring and involve too many acronyms and names of people I don’t care about. Can’t Trump tweet something dumb and crazy again and we tweet about that?

It used to be “Jon Stewart said this” and “Jon Stewart said that” and now it’s “Jimmy Kimmel said this” and “Jimmy Kimmel said that.” Even our annoying, smug comedians are getting dumber.

For the record, I’ve never heard anything about Samantha Bee that’s convinced me I should find out who Samantha Bee is.

I’ve never paid attention to how I take eggs out of the carton. I just grab the first egg I see.

What we have to overcome to get out of this political funk:
* Partisanship
* Yelly pundits who find outrage in everything and feed partisanship
* Smug political comedians who just feed already existing biases
* Improper removal of eggs from carton

For the Super Bowl, just tell me what commercials I need to watch on YouTube so I don’t feel left out of culture.

So who is more out of touch?
-Paul Ryan, who thought someone getting an extra $1.50 a week was something worth tweeting about
OR
-People who can’t fathom someone would actually be happy about an extra $78 a year

They’re still saying Solo is coming out Memorial Day and we still haven’t seen anything of the lead’s performance. I assume they’re trying to fix it in post.
I sincerely hope the movie is fun. The Last Jedi left a bad taste that’s just gotten worse as time goes by.

I’m not watching the game or the ads, but I feel as a public service I should mention that those Blaze Doritos are really good.

And while I’m not watching the game or even care about or follow the NFL at all, I’m still rooting for the Patriots to lose.

I still haven’t even seen the last Mission Impossible. I barely remember it being in theaters.

If you’re not excited for Donald Glover as young Lando, you live a sad, empty existence.
“That’s pretty good, but let’s do another take where you don’t squeal, ‘I’m playing Lando Calrissian!’”

That’s something new, right? They finally show the trailer for anticipated, coming movie and it adds “BTW, you can watch it at home tonight.”
What would have made this a perfect 2018 moment if it said, “And you can watch the new Cloverfield movie at home, tonight, thanks to the Trump tax cut.”

That Tide ad campaign is pretty brilliant. I expect thousands dead from eating Tide Pods tomorrow.

I hope the Eagles credit their win to the Trump tax cut.

What my wife actually wants is just the Doritos dust without all that unhealthy fried corn to eat.
Ooh. You could do something like a Doritos pixie stick.

I found The Good Place second season finale to be a little odd. It was almost like a combination season finale and next season premiere.

So should I stop angrily glaring at women whenever I hear them bite into a chip?

If you’re a partisan used to poor people being your props, the tax cuts helping any of them is a very bad thing.
Do I think Trump or most of the Republicans care about the poor? No. But it’s also become extremely obvious neither do most of the Dems or the bleeding hearts in the media.

One of the biggest problems in accepting capitalism is the amount of ego one has to swallow to admit a greedy capitalist trying to enrich himself can materially help the poor an order of magnitude more than those who intensely care about the poor.
It seems unjust, and it’s not hard to see why people don’t like it. Caring feels like it should mean something, and it does. It means a lot… just not in economics.

Wow, we’ve had a historic one day rise in dumb things said about the stock market.

Has it really been that long since we had a big stock market drop? I’m kinda surprised by all the people freaking out, but I guess there’s the political angle in making this look like a big deal makes Trump look dumb.
Pro Tip: You don’t need to expend any effort to make Trump look dumb.

If you don’t want to be mainsplained to, don’t woman… not know things.

If women really do want a quieter chip that’s less messy, are the people making fun of Lady Doritos making fun of women?
Reminds me of SNL sketch about a Black Widow movie imaging it being a romcom of her falling for Ultron. Persumably it was to make fun of studios for how they market to women but could also be interpreted as making fun of women for the dumb types of movies they tend to like.
And women do like romcoms. And they are all very dumb.
Romcoms. Not women.

But the stock market will be back up when I retire in 30+ years, right?

I’ll gladly pay into Social Security and get nothing back in exchange for my kids not having to pay into that farce at all.

Remember when Quentin Tarantino hosted SNL back in the 90s? This is probably inappropriate now.
And I don’t know why I always remembered that sketch. It wasn’t that funny or good.
So, first question that always came to mind: Do you think he wrote that sketch?

I would love us to get back into space. I hate how every time I talk to my kids about man landing on the moon, it ends with “Ask your grandmother about it.”

I know a few American have problems with Trump, but I think everyone has to admit he showed great leadership in helping the stock market recover today.
And also great job on the Space X launch, Trump. I don’t see how that would have been possible without the tax cuts.

I don’t quite get Jordan Peterson’s rock star status, but his biblical analysis is some pretty interesting stuff.
His style is interesting. He’ll have like a 2 minute point and take 2 hours setting it up going on seemingly unrelated tangents.

Parades are dumb and boring. Wouldn’t it be cooler to have the military blow stuff up on YouTube or something?

When my daughter was watching video of the Space X launch, she was very excited that it was something that happened today. Usually when I show her cool space stuff, it’s from decades ago.
Man, that launch was one of the only things that made me miss Florida. I used to live close enough to Cape Canaveral to see shuttle launches. A night launch is still one of the most spectacular things I’ve ever seen—and that was from 40 miles away.

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