Archive for the ‘One-Shots’ Category

Meets All the Requirements

Friday, August 22, 2014 8:00 pm

In DC, a fake cab driver dressed as a woman defrauded his fares of over $200,000.

Huh. If he cheated on his taxes, too, he’d be perfect as an Obama cabinet pick.

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One Nutshell: The Obama Economy

Friday, August 22, 2014 7:00 pm

[High Praise! to Transterrestrial Musings]

Unlike Clinton’s lies in 1992, this really is the worst economy since the Depression. And for many of the same reasons – government meddling in it.

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It’s the Big, Blue One, Right?

Friday, August 22, 2014 4:00 pm

A US spy plane was forced to evade Russian interceptors by escaping into Swedish airspace.

I don’t think Putin’s gonna buy Obama’s “he got lost on his way to IKEA” excuse.

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Somehow Familiar

Friday, August 22, 2014 8:00 am

In Los Angeles, police discovered a 150-pound giant tortoise strolling down the street and returned it to its owner.

Huh. Don’t usually see police chases that slow without a white Bronco involved.

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And It Doesn’t Play That Crazy Rap Music, Either

Thursday, August 21, 2014 8:00 pm

A Japanese company has developed a robot for nursing homes that helps take care of the elderly.

It’s very popular, since it actually gets off your lawn when told.

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It’s Not MAN-Caused

Thursday, August 21, 2014 4:00 pm

A new study shows that ants may be cooling the Earth by helping trap carbon dioxide from the environment.

Which then gets released by little boys with magnifying glasses.

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Our Fair Share

Thursday, August 21, 2014 8:00 am

In a recent immigration sob story, Geraldo Rivera wrote that the US “could feed every poor child in Central America”.

Have you seen the border lately? I think we already are.

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The Executive Branch Does What, Now?

Wednesday, August 20, 2014 8:00 pm

Democrat Congressman Gary Peters said that “immigration reform is not about enforcement”.

Sadly, with Democrats, even immigration enforcement is not about enforcement.

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Backwards Perspective

Wednesday, August 20, 2014 4:00 pm

U.S. Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said that providing women with cost-free health-insurance coverage for contraceptives is one of the “obligations” of citizenship.

No, no, no… buying it for yourself is one of the privileges of liberty.

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Repeating

Wednesday, August 20, 2014 8:00 am

Democrat Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro is seeking a national tax on sugar-sweeted drinks.

Is she SURE she wants to do that? Because, historically speaking, efforts at beverage taxes in America tend to end badly for the proposer.

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Permissive

Tuesday, August 19, 2014 8:00 pm

Virginia’s State Board of Elections changed the definition of the word “valid” in the state’s voter ID law to allow voting with an expired identification card.

Unbelievable! It doesn’t also include “had a note from his mother?”

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Seems Fair

Tuesday, August 19, 2014 4:00 pm

The DoJ is suing the Pennsylvania State Police for requiring both men and women applying for entry-level trooper jobs to pass the same physical fitness tests.

So… let me make sure I’ve got this straight… the DoJ wants the tests to be separate but equal?

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Reaching Out

Tuesday, August 19, 2014 8:00 am

Democrat Congressman John Lewis said that Republicans never supported Obama, complaining that “every olive branch he extended was broken”.

Yes, over the head of any Republican who was fool enough to trust him.

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Had to Get Here Somehow

Monday, August 18, 2014 8:00 pm

A new geological theory suggests that a rain of asteroids melted the surface of the earth 4 billion years ago.

According to current global warming theory, they were hauled in by SUVs.

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Also, There’s Now a Nuke Aimed at Frostbite Falls

Monday, August 18, 2014 4:00 pm

Facing tougher sanctions over Ukraine, Russia said it may ban imports of chicken from the US.

Huh. I would’ve guessed they’d restart the Cold War by banning moose and squirrel.

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Go Where The Market Is

Monday, August 18, 2014 8:00 am

California Governor Jerry Brown said “climate change” will drive Mexicans north.

True. In Mexico, you can’t get government money for faking a report on global warming.

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We Already Can

Sunday, August 17, 2014 8:00 pm

MSNBC’s Chris Matthews said Obama’s opponents want to be able to say he’s “a complete and utter failure.”

No, we just wish he’d give us ANY excuse to describe him another way.

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If It Rhymes, It Must Be True

Sunday, August 17, 2014 12:00 pm

Nancy Pelosi on illegal immigration: no “deportation without representation”.

Also, coincidentally, on her list: “no identification for voter registration”.

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Lightning Doesn’t Strike Twice. Except on Lightning Rods

Saturday, August 16, 2014 8:00 pm

A new report shows extensive flaws in FBI criminal case forensic lab work over the last 20 years.

But don’t worry, the government won’t mess up your labs when they run your healthcare.

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It’s the Polite Thing to Do

Saturday, August 16, 2014 12:00 pm

California Gov. Jerry Brown on illegal immigration: we should be more willing “to welcome the stranger”.

Sure, if he knocks & waits instead of kicking down the door.

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