Random Thoughts: Robert Lee and ESPN

If ESPN had let Robert Lee announce the game as normal, I’d say there was a 2% chance we’d have seen a meme of it.
And even then, people would forget about it in an hour or two.

A strange amount of being a leftist these days is running interference for the stupidity and dishonesty of large corporations.

The Robert Lee thing is another example of ESPN thinking its viewers are idiots when the real idiots are closer to home.
What kind of skewed and condescending view of people they must have to think there would have been a big controversy from Lee’s name.
The ESPN thing is another example of “sensitivity” being used as a shield for its opposite: thinking poorly of your fellow man.

The left are determined to constantly demonstrate that Trump is but one obscene idiot among many.

The guy who took Robert Lee off the UVA game to avoid controversy has to be hoping this doesn’t come up in his next performance review.

ESPN should get the Presidential Medal of Freedom for single-handedly stopping the Confederacy from rising again.

“I’m hiding the word ‘IMPEACH’ in my letter.”
“Why not just come out and say it like millions do constantly?”
“It’s a hidden message.”

Is there a word for that shudder down your spine you feel when you realize eventually there will be an entire Marvel Universe reboot?

An argument against there being an alt-left is that those encouraging and excusing violence on that side are fairly mainstream.
On the right, those excusing violence are just fringe groups with little support. Neo-nazis. White supremacists. The POTUS.

It’s illegal to shout “Wolf!” in a crowded theater unless it’s when Harvey Keitel comes on screen in Pulp Fiction.
This is settled constitutional law.

Amazon Prime’s Comrade Detective is pretty funny and insane. I don’t know why I haven’t heard more people talking about it.

You can’t shout “You can’t shout ‘Fire!’ in a crowded theater!” in an intelligent discussion on free speech.

I told my daughter what James Cameron said about Wonder Woman. Then I had to explain who he is. Then I had to explain Terminator franchise.
Then my daughter asked, “Can robots from the future really come to kill us?” And you can’t honestly answer no to that, can you?

Programming is a tense, intellectual battle between you and whoever designed the crap you’re trying to interface with it.

Hoping for a relaxing, sunny weekend here in Texas. Now to check the weather forecast as I sip my drink…

In defense of Trump, maybe he has no idea what he’s doing.

New hurricane prep step: Download shows you’re binging to iPad in case the power goes out.

I can never take the word “humanist” seriously. Like is it opposed to “dogist”?

I’ve only read Game of Thrones. Last thing I remember was Jon Snow being stabbed to death – only interesting thing to happen in last 2 books.
The third book of Game of Thrones was one of the most exciting things I ever read, but things kinda meandered after that.

One of most frustrating things as some who writes in spare time is imaging what George R.R. Martin does with his day as a full time writer.
I mean, I’m lucky if I get an hour to write a day, and I’m still guessing I’ll have the sequel to Superego out before Winds of Winter.
Anyway, taking years would be okay if they were masterpieces, but the last two needed lots of editing for pacing.

I really enjoyed Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2. Made me do something I almost never do: rewatch a Marvel movie as I rewatched vol 1.
I’ve seen and enjoyed almost every Marvel movie but they never seem worth returning to. Maybe first Iron Man.

Why is “alt-fascist” abbreviated as “antifa”?

I’ve heard of both Taylor Swift and Beyoncé and understand they are both singers. That’s all I have to contribute to this conversation.

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Random Thoughts: Nazis, the Eclipse, an the Defenders

WWII Veterans : Antifa = Prime Rib : Giant Turd

Stalin opposed Hitler, and not only was it okay to criticize Stalin, it was morally necessary.

Getting a little afraid that the left are going to use literal nazis to justify political violence from the horrible people on their side.

I just want awful people denounced regardless of what political views they espouse.

#NationalTellAJokeDay Why did the chicken cross the road? To show the raccoons it can be done.

My daughter asked why Scrooge McDuck wants more money when he already has a vault full of it. I guess I need to explain capitalism to her.
“You have to understand when Scrooge introduces a lost gem from Atlantis into the economy, that expands it for everyone.”

“Expert” and “scientist” are terms that pretend to tell you qualifications when they tell you nothing. I say this as an expert scientist.

This is getting a little out of hand; they just tore down a statue of Bruce Lee.

“No, no, no. I’m the good kind of hate-filled, angry person.”

I’m forming the “No Trumps” party if anyone wants to join.
And despite the name, we’re not even allowed one.

This feels like the hundredth time I’ve thought to myself, “Well this looks like the end of Trump.”

Do they ever have Asian supremacy marches in Japan?

The Trump presidency has gone as well as could reasonably be expected.

And stop bringing up we have 3.5 more years of this. One day at a time. One. Day. At a time.

Dunkirk has been so successful they’re going to do a prequel – Begin-kirk. #NationalTellAJokeDay

I can’t believe it’s 2017 and we’re dealing with racists marching with torches. We should be battling space racists.

Statues are big metal people who don’t move or do anything. They’re like broken robots. Stupid.
I once visited a statue, but I didn’t understand what you’re supposed to do with it. Look at it, I guess. Why?

“I’m afraid of nazis having free speech, so let’s empower Trump to decide whose speech is ‘intolerant’ and should be banned.”

Be less afraid of the external nazis and more afraid of the seed of a nazis inside yourself.

Nazis don’t like free speech. Don’t be like a Nazi.

The statue stuff getting crazy. They tore down a Hitler statue and replaced it with Gandhi… which sounds ok except they left Captain America punching him.

There are limits to free speech. You can’t speak more than 24 hours per day, for instance.

Did Romney try “Catch the Mitt!” as a campaign slogan?
Well, too late now.

Sad we have to keep explaining the problems with “hate speech” laws which you think would be extremely obvious with Trump as president.

Bannon? More like Ban-him! #PoliticalHumor

Why… why is it important to so many people that Tina Fey get politics “right”? She’s like a comedian or something.
Know who it’s more important be right about politics? That president Trump guy. But I hardly ever hear leftists criticize what he says.

If you think Trump is special threat, but your worry with him being gone is Pence will be president, you’re what’s called a “dumb partisan.”

Bannon was fired because he got tired of winning. Look how tired that guy looks. Winning is obviously worse than smoking.

I’m going to wait for the Xbox One X 2.

In high school, one of our football games got interrupted by bunch of guys marching with tubas and drums. No idea what they were protesting.

Dumb, violent fascists are bad if they specifically label themselves as “Nazis.”

One side is calling themselves pro-free speech and the other side anti-fascist and I’m guessing neither is correctly labeled.

I don’t know if it’s fair, but I ain’t ever letting my daughter date a feminist.

It’s strange contest in who understands less about science: Those who doubt everything from it or those who believe it with an undying faith

Why do trust science when it makes solid, verifiable predictions but not when it makes vague predictions of doom that can’t be falsified?

The only thing that sounds interesting to me about the eclipse is how it freaks out the animals.
They must have been way more interesting before we knew how to predict them. Kinda ruins the magic now.

“Where… where’d the sun go? Is it coming back?”

“Oh. There it is. That was a scary couple minutes.”

I haven’t been watching Game of Thrones but I have been watching The Crown and this statement applies to both of them: Monarchies are stupid

We should only build statues to men we know will never let us down, i.e. fictional ones. Like Robocop.

Liking The Defenders, but it was a bit slow to start. Two and a half episodes seems like a long time to take to get them all together.
It wasn’t until the beginning of the fourth episode that I got exactly what I was looking for: All of them talking, butting heads.

Did the pinhole thing for the partial eclipse in Texas. It was lame. Guess I need to wait for 2024.

I just use the yellow emojis. I assume the specifically white emojis are some sort of trap to identify white supremacists.

I hope everyone learned an important science lesson from the eclipse about how something can get in front of something else and block it.
I hope that really showed all those doubters who don’t believe things can be opaque.

The earth is expected to block the sun tonight for several hours.

We’re told we’re supposed to be happy about the hate-filled losers who aren’t Nazis, but they also make me very sad.

I find the whole Trump presidency rather depressing. The only thing that cheers me up is remembering Hillary losing.

Reminder: At least one of your deeply held beliefs you’re extremely certain about is absolutely wrong.

“The city of New York is at risk of destruction, and only ones who can save it are four people abnormally good at punching – The Defenders!”

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Random Thoughts: Nazis and DuckTales

The whole James Damore thing has exposed a lot of journalists who should be fired.

If we get nuked, then I’ll have to admit Donald Trump was a pretty bad idea. So you’ll have that going for you.

Can’t we all just get along?
The answer, of course, is no. And it’s probably racist and sexist to suggest otherwise.

It’s good to know our media apparatus will spring into action to defend a $100 billion dollar company from a lone dissenter it fired.

The one thing I hear the most from people is how much they love my sarcasm.
But there’s something off about the way they say it…

explaining the nuclear apocalypse to my grandchildren
“We didn’t Pokemon Go to the polls.”

The problem with the NRA is they’ve basically completely and utterly won their issue and now they’re just becoming a silly partisan group.

Communists, socialists, Nazis – thought we done with those after they murdered millions last century. Aren’t there any horrible new ideas?

Don’t think people realize equality makes no sense from an evolutionary perspective. But it makes perfect sense when you believe in a soul.
Don’t think many people – myself included – always act like everyone is of equal value. Hard concept but something to constantly strive for.

I’ll only worry something significant is going on when I see people behaving in a way that’s inconsistent with partisanship.

Why don’t I hear condemnation from the people I insulate myself from?

One day there will be a take so hot that the entire internet will burst into flames.
And then we’ll be free.

Watching The Crown. I’m finding their Winston Churchill a much more interesting character than Frank Underwood.
Churchill was not a big fan of Nazis.

It would have been nice if the left had some new level of outrage for Trump that they didn’t already use up on Mitt Romney.

I know the pilot often doesn’t have the opening song, but if they do that for the DuckTales reboot it will be a crime against humanity.

I don’t know what the downsides are of denouncing white supremacy that Trump is trying to avoid.
The left will screech just as loud no matter what Trump says (which is why they’re useless), but he could avoid giving substance to that.
Eh. Trying to understand Trump is a full time job and there doesn’t seem to be a point to it.

Yay, finally found my Paperwhite. The 9.7″ iPad Pro is fine for reading, but nothing beats the comfort of those little Kindles.

Way more people asked to be beta readers than I was expecting. Don’t think they know what it’s like reading 100,000 words only edited by me.

Thought the new DuckTales was great. It was a big hit with my kids and I enjoyed it too.
My 4yo now wants a cane and lots of coins to be like Scrooge. My 1yo made me replay the theme song 50 times in a row.

I’m kinda uncomfortable with the concept of statues of particular people in general.

We should tear down The Thinker statue. Odds are he’s thinking something problematic.

My guess is when we get Winds of Winter it will just be a transcript of the video description of the last couple seasons of Game of Thrones.

Glad Disney is finally rereleasing The Lion King. I need to teach my son an important lesson about avenging my death.

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Random Thoughts: Socialism, Communism, and Google

True socialism has never been tried. That would kill a country instantly instead of slowly weakening it.

Could someone very slowly and carefully explain to me what a “buttered roll” is?

Coconuts grow on deserted islands because that’s the only place anyone would be tempted to eat one.
“So what kind of fruit does this tree have?”
“It’s a… brown hairy ball full of wax.”
“Can… can trees have mental problems?”

So before today, did anyone else know you could put butter on a roll and eat it? I just used rolls as something to chuck at squirrels.

Most action movies are cheering on bad guys getting shot. I guess the more grounded in reality, the more “problematic” that becomes.
Taken was kind of in that mold, and it was very popular. At the cinema, we tend to like the simple, unapologetic solution to evil.

Is a poem written on a statue binding law? Before you answer, know that the statue is very very big.

He’s a father who after an unspeakable tragedy no longer cares if SJWs come after him en masse. It’s Bruce Willis in Problematic Wish.
“You can’t just gleefully gun down thugs without being contemplative about the underlying socioeconomic concerns!”
“Try and stop me.”

Considering the record, if you still support Communism over Capitalism, you absolutely, positively do not care about famine or the poor.
With the record of Capitalism versus Communism on famine, that’s like comparing a prime rib dinner to a shotgun to the groin.

Difference between Nazi and Communist is when you say how horrible Nazis have been, they don’t say, “Well, real Nazism has never been tried”

Really, though, who cares about the NYT? When was the last time they influenced anyone who wasn’t already a mindless left-wing partisan?

The difference between a prophet and a scientist is that there are more specific qualifications to being called a prophet.
We’d all be much smarter if journalists were required to replace “scientists say” with “some guys say”.
Then you’d ask, “Who are these guys and why should I believe them?” Questions some people think the term “scientist” answers when it doesn’t.

Guys, come on. Keep quiet on spoilers for the next 40 years while I’m waiting for George R.R. Martin to finish the books.

NYC having best pizza sounds like a dumb urban legend. You can just copy whatever recipes they have and make it the same in any other city.
Same for bagels.

Isn’t limiting the acceptable areas of discussion more anti-science than anything else?

So is Google even going to attempt to refute what the guy said or are they just going to fire him?

Whoever thought promoting diversity and tolerance would so often involve screaming, “Burn the witch!”?

Looking like 2020 will again be an easy choice between a cartoonish, moron buffoon and people who will constantly lie and try to destroy you.

There’s a hotline to call to report any nuclear wars you see.

The North is definitely my least favorite of the Koreas.

I’m all for tolerance as long as it’s for things I approve of.

What struck me about the Google memo was how earnest it was. He honestly thought he was going to foster a discussion.
He thought response would be “Here’s where you’re wrong and where your biases are blinding you.” Instead it was “You hate diversity! Fired!”
He comes off as this poor, naive guy who foolishly believed people who disagreed with you had other settings than “Crush! Kill! Destroy!”
Lesson learned for other Google employees: Stick to quietly seething.

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Random Thoughts: Kid Rock and Anakin

With his trans in the military tweets, Trump is responding to the controversy of how former men keep dominating the women’s division of war.

“We interrupt your Netflix streaming to bring you breaking news: Trump just tweeted something.” -possible future nightmare world

“We now return you to your Netflix stream already in progress.”
“No! Why would you do that? Rewind it!”

HILLARY: “I would like to announce my new book, What Happened. It will be $500, which as far as I know is a good price for a book.”

Biggest nightmare as a father is to hear someone utter “What bad kids.” and then hear Mr Miyagi correct them with, “No such thing as bad kids, only bad parent.”

If I was richest person on earth, I’d buy a plaque saying so. Hopefully it costs less than the difference between my wealth and the 2nd richest.

I loved the ending to Angie Tribeca’s third season. It was so so stupid.

A garbage fire that burns brighter than the sun.

Senator Kid Rock will only be a couple steps away from having an Insane Clown Posse caucus.

Has Pickle been located and brought to justice yet?

The whole internet hates Pickle, the 9yo who loves Trump! 5 seconds later We regret to inform you he’s real and not a racist

As a parent, hard to imagine the powerless of the government telling you your child must die and you’re not even allowed to bring him own.
That was a disgrace. Those were not the actions of a civilized nation.
If this were attempted in the U.S., I hope we’d see people imprisoned for kidnapping.

Instead of tying self in logical knots defending state preventing treatment of a child, why not admit you’re a horrible person and move on?
And please stay away from the health care debate.
It is really rather scary that a bunch of left-wing sociopaths want to control something so important.

If it’s President Trump and Senator Kid Rock, the obvious path forward for the GOP will be all B-list celebrities.

No one is actually against capitalism, but there are some extremely dedicated poseurs.

Trump is playing three-dimensional chess. It only looks like he’s losing two-dimensional tic-tac-toe to a chicken.

“The Jedi have been lying to you, Anakin.”
“You’re right!”
“You should go their temple and murder all the kids there.”
“Um.. sure, why not?”

Actually would be nice if there was a scene where Anakin proudly tells the Emperor he killed all the younglings and the emperor is horrified.
“I murdered the younglings!”
“What? I never said to do that!”
“I’m embracing the dark side.”
“You’re a psychopath!”

“Doesn’t this all seem rather contrived to you?” -me in the universe of any show aimed at preschoolers

Imagine if Trump stopped tweeting and we just had to imagine what nonsense was going on in his head. Sounds terrifying.

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Random Thoughts: Civil Asset Forfeiture and OJ

Enjoyed Resident Evil 7. Best since 4. Started very different, but ended as regular guns a blazing Resident Evil.
Enjoyed the earlier part with little combat more than the later sections fighting a bunch of bullet sponges.
RE4 is one of my favorite games of all times, but strangely the more RE7 stayed away from the combat-heavy focus, the better it was.

Interesting people recognize civil asset forfeiture as theft but not taxation. Both involves assets taken without charge of a crime.

seize an arbitrary amount of money from one person
seize arbitrary amount from everyone
“Don’t you want roads and schools?”

If civil asset forfeiture goes to the Supreme Court, will Justice Roberts save it by calling it a tax?

This is fun. Next up is whether you can come up with a fundamental difference between a mob running a protection racket and the government.

My sources are telling me that the Grand Moff of the Supreme Court is heading here from Alpha Centauri to seize power from Trump.

What many don’t understand is that as horrible as Trump is, to many the average politician is much worse.
Yet people are still expending energy trying to prove Trump is horrible like that now means anything to anyone.

Do you sometimes get the impression that Trump is kinda dumb and has poor impulse control?
I don’t want to rag on him, though. It’s a tough job I don’t want to do. Like being a waitress.

I don’t get it. Donald Duck and Daisy have zero chemistry.

My main memory of the OJ trial was a big groan throughout my high school when the verdict was announced.
How did we get news updates back then? I guess some classes turned on radios or TVs.

My sources are telling me Bannon has been secretly executed and Marshal of the SCOTUS has disguised himself as Bannon and taken his place.

The way things are going, if OJ Simpson gets parole, there’s a 13% chance he’ll be the next president of the United States.

“Better Skills, Better Jobs, Better Wages.” Would love poll on how many people still believe DC is capable of delivering any of those things.

I was unaware Splatoon 2 lacked a split-screen multiplayer when I ordered it. That is going to cause contention with the kids.

Jan Brady voice
“Russia! Russia! Russia!”

The Justice League trailer makes it look like they really are going to try to make Aquaman happen.
And I guess there is some sort of clause where WB loses rights to all DC characters if they ever make a movie that’s bright and colorful.

The British government kidnapped a child to make sure he did not receive potentially life-saving treatment.

Remember slow news days?

Everyone in the country should get one large box (24″ x 18″) full of health care. For free.

I thought the Senate had literally voted to murder me, but it was the “Murder Frank J. Flemming Act” and my name only has one ‘m’.

Calm down, everybody. You shouldn’t be freaking out unless you’re a member of Trump’s cabinet.

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Random Thoughts: Net Neutrality and Lady Doctor

I’ve never watched Game of Thrones because of how porny it sounds. I have read the books, though.

If your solution to our problems is “elect Democrats,” you don’t have any solutions and are in fact part of the problem.
And probably goes without saying that “more Republicans” isn’t going to fix things either.

The next Republican presidential nom is probably going to be something idiotic like Kid Rock and Dem one even more idiotic like Hillary.

I need to start charging for my political opinions. I don’t want to devalue them by giving them away for free.

Anytime a corporation support a government regulation, get crazy suspicious.

If no one ever takes the presidency seriously again, Trump will have been our most successful president ever.

Net neutrality thing reminds me of Obamacare repeal in default state of things from few years ago now being sold as doomsday beyond belief.

“We need to support net neutrality to keep people from being taken advantage of by large corporations.”
“Say who?”

We talked less about Russia when they had nukes pointed at us and we’re actively threatening to destroy us.

With Trump as president, it seems like Stranger Things should just be called Things.

So has anyone prominent on the left said something one way or another on the Charlie Gard thing? The silence on the issue is kinda creepy.

On plus side for the GOP, it’s going to be hard to do attack ads on them. “Don’t elect those scary Republicans or they’ll… do nothing.”

I like taking the kids to the pool because it’s my one opportunity to see how far I can throw them.

I have no idea anymore what people imagine capitalism and socialism to be.
Anyway, I’m for whatever system involves less pointing guns at people and telling them what to do.
I also like how freedom leads to adaptable feedback loops and am suspicious of the fragility and inefficiency of centralized control.

The choice isn’t capitalism or socialism which apparently means different things to different people. The choice is free markets or cronyism.
Or to put it another way, do you want your money going to corporations voluntarily or involuntarily?

“Lady Doctor Who, make me a samm-”
has the sandwich already ready because she can travel through space and time

What do you call it when you don’t see any actual outrage but you see lots of people righteously responding to supposed outrage?

I swear, a lot of people preach tolerance and understanding solely to get in fights on the internet.

What does it say about us as a society that we had a female Doctor before a female president? That’s an actual question; I have no idea.

“Finally, a female Doctor Who. What a blow for feminism! This will– Wait, why are there now so many scenes of the Doctor showering?”

Doctor regenerates into a woman
“Time to travel through space and time to find someone outraged by this so I can righteously respond!”

Seriously, it’s like 2% people celebrating a female Doctor Who and 98% loudly berating people supposedly offended by it.

My only hope about the lady Doctor Who is that Donald Trump tweets about it.

New rule: You can only respond to someone being outraged if you actually saw someone get outraged and didn’t have to search for it.
Reading an article that someone somewhere was outraged doesn’t count.

Enjoying The Grinder which only had one season, but it’s American so there’s still more episodes than most long running BBC series.

Sherlock, which has run for seven years, still has fewer episodes than the one half season of Firefly.

Doctor Her?

Now that the Women’s March has succeeded in making the next Doctor Who female, are they disbanding?

There has to be at least a couple women worth celebrating who aren’t cop killers.

Why can’t the Democrats learn from the Republicans and accomplish absolutely nothing when in power?

“Sure we’re completely worthless, but we’re not as bad as the other guys!” -Democrat and Republican slogan for 2018

Rich people don’t deserve their money. The U.S. government deserves it a thousand times less.

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Random Thoughts: CNN and Russia! Russia! Russia!

Both Trump and CNN don’t seem to understand how their actions appear to normal people.

The left seems to think any method is excused because they are fighting horrible people but they forget that they are also horrible people.

When I saw a video with a CNN logo poorly photoshopped into it, at no point did I think “I must know more about who did this.”

I think the best way Lex Luther could destroy Superman is expose that he’s actually a journalist.

During a checkup, spent hundreds on tests for my 14yo shepherd/pit mix, though I suspect the results will come back as “She’s old!”
She’s nearly deaf, but she still hears well enough to get scared during thunderstorms and fireworks 🙁

It’s good to put your name and face to what you say. But there are reasons not to.

“Someone wrote a tweet criticizing CNN. Here’s the first of a five part story on where his children go to school.”

I pronounce GIF like “Jif” and the peanut butter Jif like “Gif”.

If you’re wondering why people are voting against their interests, the answer probably is “because you’re a prick.”

Since both properties are owned by Warner Brothers, there should be a canon answer to who is faster: the Flash or Speedy Gonzales.

I’d probably be more outraged by the Ivanka thing if I knew what stuff like the G20 was other than a protest magnet.
I don’t think the protesters know what it is either.

TRUMP: “Putin assures me he’s not behind cyberattacks and gave me a doll with another smaller doll inside it. I did not investigate further”

Is taxation theft? Let’s say the government didn’t have any guns. How many people would voluntarily pay their current tax burden?

I still can’t figure out whether it’s dumb to be afraid of Russia or to not be afraid of Russia.

Can I become president of the United States and still rant about the man trying to keep me down?

I thought in the 80s we strangled all the socialists and built a Walmart on their grave.

My 6yo daughter’s favorite word is “Actually…”

I’m beginning to enjoy our weird orange president and am dreading the day we again have a president some people take seriously.

One day there will be people living in luxury we can’t even imagine and they will complain about how bad they have it because of inequality.
You can never have so much you won’t complain if someone else has a lot more. Than doesn’t necessarily mean the other person is the problem.

I never for the life of me understood who David Brooks’s audience is supposed to be.

There’s two Donald Trumps?

I don’t get the secularization of holidays. What does a bunny have to do with Easter? What does a sale at Amazon have to do with the birth of Optimus Prime?

I’m for executing Don Jr. for treason if that’s what it will take to get us to finally stop talking about Russia.

The next Wonder Woman film will take place in the 80s and be about her teaming up with cyborg Ronald Reagan to fight Commies.

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Random Thoughts: Trump Tweets and Independence Day

You don’t have a right to anything someone else has to provide.

For people who have it better off than anyone else in human history, we sure whine a lot.

Free markets gives no guarantee, but consistently delivers best results. Government gives guarantees it can’t honor. People want guarantees.
It’s like from Tommy Boy, but people would rather you take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed.

I guess the NYT’s defense in Palin’s suit will be that their editorial board wasn’t malicious but just some of the dumbest people in print.
I might be sympathetic to that argument.

I don’t know the merits of Palin’s lawsuit, but NYT wrote an editorial based on slanderous nonsense. Someone should have been fired.

I was once on the cover of Time, but I don’t hang it up in my country clubs.

"…and that’s why you got Trump."

Single-payer sounds like a great idea unless you’re the one selected by lottery to pay for everyone’s health care.

I’m sure by year six he’ll start acting presidential.

Anyone want a hot take on why it’s good the president is attacking someone about her facelift? I can get you a 1000 words, but I’m not cheap.

We’d rather a right to health care than health care.

Hadn’t read comic book in a while and thinking of getting the Elmer Fudd/Batman crossover. $5! What rich elitists comic book readers must be.

Supergirl is by far the dumbest of the CW DC comics shows, but I like their Superman better than the current movie Superman.
Superman is supposed to be hopeful and uplifting (counterpoint to Batman). That’s why DCEU Wonder Woman is better Superman than Superman.

I don’t care for the new NRA ad, but I’m also not outraged by it.
They lose me early on with the “They’re saying mean things about the president!” line.

My wife woke me at 2am to kill a spider. Didn’t she learn anything from watching Wonder Woman?

Baby Driver’s nemesis is Toonces the Driving Cat.

Trump is a terrible human being, but if he continues to be ineffective implementing any of his plans, he could be an above-average president.

I might be in a bubble, but so far I haven’t seen anyone on the left comment on the Charlie Gard case one way or another.
When you’re pushing more government control over health care, it seems like you might want to address worst-case horror stories.
Of course, this is beyond single-payer. It’s not just the government saying it won’t pay; it’s saying you can’t pay either.

So what are the parameters on a preferred pronoun? Like, can I state that it always has to be capitalized?
I’m going to make my preferred pronoun 135 characters long to make it really hard to make fun of me on Twitter.

If they repeal Obamacare, is there a repeal ceremony? Like dumping the law into a fire pit while Obama is forced to watch?

lit by the burning law, Trump points a finger at a weeping Obama
“Ash is your legacy now! ASH!”

In Trump’s defense, vomiting every incoherent thought he has onto Twitter did make him president, so I’m not sure why he should stop now.

Of the sociopaths in DC, the Dems are the more annoying ones since they really really want everyone to believe they care about people.

“I am the very model of a modern U.S. president…”

For twelfth anniversary, did the tasting menu at Barley Swine in Austin. Highly, highly recommend.

In Chris Christie’s defense [ERROR: Second half of sentence not found.]

I constantly get Alison Brie and Brie Larson confused.

Happy Independence Day! Try to whine less and do more with the insane amount of advantages you’ve inherited.

Wait. What do I say to followers from other countries on the 4th? “Our condolences.”

If you’re cool and from another country, come live in America. It’s the best. If you’re not cool, stay where you are.

What makes US great is it’s dedication to freedom, not government programs. Plenty of countries with govt that make promises they can’t keep.
But a dedication to freedom is truly respect for all people. That is rare and worth fighting for.

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Random Thoughts: The ACHA and Milkshake Duck

I hope little girls see the Wonder Woman movie and realize they can be anything they want to be. Except ghostbusters.

The Dems make a pretty good argument that Trump is terrible. They don’t have a good argument that they’re better.

“We’ll stop the ACHA!”
“You think we’d reveal our bill if there remained a chance of you affecting its outcome? We passed it 35 minutes ago.”

Would help the WH spokespeople explain away Trump’s statements if they could say, “You have to remember, the president is kind of a dummy.”

“But he implied he had tapes of Comey.”
“There’s a simple explanation for that: Trump’s an idiot who should not be taken seriously.”
And then everyone would just sort of nod and say, “That makes sense. He does seem like an idiot.” And the scandal is gone.

Is there anyone saying how bad Trumpcare will be who didn’t squander all their credibility saying how great Obamacare would be?

BEFORE: “Obamacare means lower premiums and you get to keep your doctor.”
NOW: “Repealing Obamacare will kill people!”
Whatever, liars.

“Planned Parenthood does a lot of other things than abortion” always reminds me of “The Civil War wasn’t just about slavery.” Yes, but no.
If PP did all it currently does except abortion, neither Republicans nor Democrats would care about it. Public wouldn’t have heard of it.
Pretending opposition to PP is anything other than opposition to abortion or support is something other than support of abortion is silly.
In a free country, people who don’t like abortion wouldn’t need to have their money associated with it.
And in a free country, people who like abortion could voluntarily raise all the money they want for abortions.
But no one likes a free country. We like partisan footballs.
So says me, Frank J. Fleming, the only reasonable person observing politics. You can praise me for my wisdom now.

When Obama jumps in the debate, I think “There’s that sociopath who ruined my health insurance and wants me to thank him.”

Was… was Johnny Depp comparing Trump to President Lincoln?

Writing sequel to Superego is not going as fast as hoped. I only have a little spare time each day for it. Still, I’d guess you’ll see it before Game of Thrones book 6.

How do you determine what a living wage is? Do you pay someone less and less until he dies?

“The Republicans are going to kill millions of people!!!”
“Eh… still rather them than the Democrats.”

For all those yelling about it, if the AHCA passes, do you have plans to try and save the thousands (millions?) who are going to die?

I don’t agree with the left that if someone’s labor is worth less than $15 an hour then it should be illegal for that person to get a job.

The suggested retail price for SNES Classic is $80 and the suggested eBay price is $400.

Pretty hard to tell what’s going on with health care, but at least you can be certain that no one on either side is telling you the truth.

Capitalism is a system that will give you everything you ever wanted as long as you can be okay with someone else having a lot more.

So are we supposed to pretend to not notice the huge differential between the men’s leagues and women’s leagues in sports?

I was disturbed to find out about Milkshake Duck’s racism. But I’m also disturbed by how quickly and viciously people turned on him.
Yes racism is bad. But we’re all bad. We all have awful flaws. There is beauty and ugliness in us. We all drink milkshakes and are racists.
And isn’t the most problematic thing of all placing yourself on a pedestal above someone else? Or above a milkshake drinking duck?
I don’t like the path we’re on. It’s a path along which the trains get ever smaller. Far enough along, we’ll be in tiny train world.

I don’t think we have enough guns in this country until we have enough for every man, woman, and child to dual-wield.

It would be nice if either George W. Bush or Barack Obama wrote “Being a U.S. President for Dummies.” I know who I’d buy it for.

The great thing about having three kids is now I can put up weekly child rankings to motivate them.

So single-payer is the theory that everything will be all puppies and sunshine if Trump just had more control over health care.

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Random Thoughts: Wonder Woman and Georgia Special Election

Dang. Got a hole in my jeans. And I can’t pretend to be stylish enough for that.

Favorite gun control was NY changing max magazine capacity from 10 to 7. That’s it, guys. It was those 3 bullets. You solved gun violence.

I’m not going to play by the left’s rules. The left are insufferable. I’m still trying to cling to my last shred of sufferability.

We can either do nothing about gun violence or pass some gun control… which is a more active form of doing nothing about gun violence.

For the “climate of hate” thing with Gabby Giffords shooting, is it so hard for people to admit they were partisan hacks about that issue?

Maybe little harsh, but I’m absolutely flabbergasted that the NYT with their demonstrated inability to learn anything try to be influencers.
“We at the New York Times, who refuse to acknowledge basic facts, have some opinions we thought important to share…”

Why does the NYT lie so much? It what you’d expect from someone working for a political party, but they’re supposed to be independent.

Trump’s tweet from a few years ago of “Justice is stupid! We should obstruct it!” will probably come back to haunt him.

As long as the NYT is venerated as some paper of record, no one will trust journalists.

When NYT points out that Trump is dishonest and delusional, people assume they’re criticizing him when in fact they’re expressing kinship.

Another day living in an era where basic necessities are easily met and you have access to all the world’s knowledge. Let’s do something!

Don’t care for music. “A bunch of sounds put to a pattern! I’m going to sit here and listen to it like a dumb baby!” Stupid.

“The NYT would like to thank its readers for pointing out it’s not proven that Bush did 9/11 and the article now reflects the uncertainty.”

If it looks like the president is losing badly at 8 dimensional chess, that’s because he’s actually playing 9 dimensional chess.

If Trump goes to prison, that doesn’t mean we have to impeach him. Nothing in the Constitution says the president can’t serve from prison.
Might make a neat movie. Prison POTUS. All that power, but also locked up. Could be a drama instead of a comedy. But not if starring Trump.
New show/reality idea: Trump flees to Russia to avoid prosecution and ends up sharing an apartment with Snowden. Hijinks ensue.

I unironically like both Amazon and Whole Foods. Is that allowed?

This latest scandal is the end of Trump for sure. #EvergreenTweet

Eventually the only speech in this country will be people yelling incoherently to keep someone else from speaking.

The president, whether he’s Obama or Trump, does not deserve your respect. He’s your dumbass employee. And he does a terrible job.

“A man was shot in the street! Isn’t that horrible?”
“I need to know how many of my political beliefs he shared before I can answer that.”

Contra the overpopulation worries, food as continued to become cheaper and cheaper as the earth has become more populated.
People are the earth’s most valuable resource. It’s kind of missing the point of everything to worry about having too many of them.

Being a father is the closest thing to being a superhero. In little kids’ eyes, it’s the same thing.

For Father’s Day, I finally got to see Wonder Woman. Thought it lived up to the hype.
It was nice to have a superhero who was just a good person who wanted to help and no tragic backstory. WW is what Superman is supposed to be.
And Wonder Woman is just adorable in the movie with her kindness and naïveté. You fear she’s going to get hurt — just not physically.
Anyway, it’s a really fun superhero movie. One of the best so far. Has me excited for Justice League despite how bad previous DC movies were
Unfortunately, I don’t think the movie is appropriate for my 6yo daughter who wanted to see it.

One of my ideas is if you pass a law that’s unanimously overturned by SCOTUS, you’re arrested for treason against the Constitution.

Has the NRA really said nothing about the Philando Castile verdict? The whole thing is very scary to people who legally conceal carry.
Here’s a comic I draw a long time ago about my wife’s gun coming up in a stop. I was so woke.

New Zelda ruined most other games for me. Finally got to playing Far Cry 4 and Fallout 4, and my reaction is, “Eh, I’ve done this before.”

If everyone agreed with me, then who would I look down on?

Charity is the outdated idea that people can help each other without guns involved.

This is probably much closer to becoming reality than The Handmaid’s Tale.

The special election in GA will determine whether dictatorship that reigns for the next 40 years will be led by a Republican or a Democrat.

DEMOCRATS: “We screwed up health care first, and now the Republicans are trying to screw it up differently. Please donate.”

I’m a little confused about how outraged I’m supposed to be that Gal Gadot barely made it into the evil 1% with her Wonder Woman salary.
Does she have a brother named Guy Gadot?

I guess it’s progress that the pro-tolerance side now has at least as many hate-filled sociopaths as the bigoted side.

“If we’re nuked by North Korea, it’s b/c we broke their rules, which is wrong. And we must remember the good intentions of their communism.”

Apparently the punchline to the stupid Gal Gadot salary thing is that for Man of Steel, Amy Adams made much more than the male lead.
Really, how dumb do you have to be to think Cavill made $14 million for his first big role? Did you just learn about Hollywood this morning?

If you can’t buy a stupid congressional district for $24 million, what’s this world coming to?

Now that the Democrats have lost the most important election in the history of the multiverse, I’m pretty sure they have to disband.
Still, it’s a moral victory.

The Republicans have to be getting tired of winning.

Karen Handel won, just like that woman in that popular movie, Wonder Woman.

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Random Thoughts: Comey, Free Market, and Health Care

So is Universal Studios trying to save money by making a universe based around public domain characters?

Is there anyone who loved Breaking Bad who isn’t watching Better Call Saul? Because that would be insane.
Better Call Saul is the makers of Breaking Bad using what they’ve learned from that series to further their craft even more.

We keep being told we’re going to get evidence of high crimes and misdemeanors and all we ever get is more evidence Trump is kind of a dummy.

The Fallout series is getting boring and repetitive. I hope in the next one they finally change war.

I see Britain is having an election. What are even the issues there? White wig shortages? O’s lacking U’s? Terrorism?

My questions for Comey:
What does FBI stand for?
How long will Trump be president?
Where is Russia?
Instead of FBI director, wouldn’t your name be better for an anthropomorphic comb?
Are you related to Banksy?
Does the White House have a lock on the outside? Like could we lock Trump in there so he can’t get out?

Everyone’s voting YOLO!

I think the solution for the U.K. is to make a robot their PM: Optimus Prime Minister.

The youth are rejecting old, failed ideas for newer old, failed ideas.

Maybe Trump and Corbyn can break the ice talking about the violent authoritarians they admire.

My level of understanding of British politics is that I’m still stuck at trying to figure out what in the world a “Jezza” is.

Mickey Mouse’s friends need to confront him on his unhinged narcissism, though he’ll probably insist it be called a “mousekaintervention.”

I just got a big check from George Soros to say bad things about Trump, but Trump is so great! What should I do?

The free market is the only working system we have for solving scarcity. All government can ever do about scarcity is manage it. Poorly.
But the free market is also this scary, profane thing run by greed, which is why we keep it away from important things, like health care.
I think we’re on the path to single payer as a free market system is just to awful to contemplate – even if it’s better in the long run.

I have a lot of dire predictions lately, but I’m comforted by the fact that I, like everyone else, am horrible at predicting the future.

“Textile” means cloth? That’s a really bad word for it. Who came up with that? Idiot.

I don’t care about people saying awful things about Trump. I just wished they’d say more awful things about all the other politicians.

Trump is useful because when people despise and are horrified by Trump, they now understand how I feel about their favorite politicians.

My daughter was curious to see the Super Mario Bros. movie, but I only have the RiffTrax version. Probably for the best.
A few minutes into it, my 4yo son asked if we could turn it off so he could go to bed.
I didn’t remember it was about Princess Daisy. That actually makes sense since she’s more Luigi’s love interest. The only accuracy.
Only legitimately funny scene in movie is where Mario and Luigi think they’re getting executed and they’re just getting their picture taken.

I don’t care for Shakespeare. The dialog is very unrealistic. No one talks like that.

I got a lot of angry responses from fanboys for insulting Shakespeare. It’s just like that time I made fun of Batman v Superman.

Why did they hire Kathy Griffin to direct Shakespeare?

Your biggest unearned privilege is the year you’re born in.

Console upgrades are getting boring. “It can render a few more polygons now. If you squint really hard, you can see the difference. $500.”
Nintendo is the only one trying to do anything interesting with hardware, and many times succeeding.

Don’t fire people for saying a bad thing about a politician. Fire people for saying good things about politicians.

Are the Democrats complaining about a health care bill being rushed and poorly thought out?

I don’t understand the Alex Jones interview controversy. Isn’t he newsworthy? Isn’t that the standard even if he’s a pile of garbage?

I’m thinking of selling out. At these cocktail parties I’d be invited to, are the drinks free?

Pfft. Wonder Woman. I’m going to teach my daughters to emulate Samus Aran.
Though not the one from Other M.

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Random Thoughts: Covfefe and Iron Fist

Obviously, Covfefe is the name of Trump’s childhood sled.

When you think about it, the rise of Donald Trump is sort of Citizen Kane rebooted as a wacky comedy.

Seems like a good compromise is to tie voting and gun rights. Whatever makes you eligible for one makes you eligible for other.
One thing to make clear. Voting isn’t a right like self-defense. Voting is a compromise since the government interferes in our rights.
You don’t even have a right to a say over the affairs of anyone else, which voting purposes to be.
But as long as we’re pretending we get to tell each other what to do, I guess it’s more fair we all get to participate.

I am not concerned about climate change because unlike regressives, I am not scared of change.
“I’m an old fogey! I want a climate like we had back in the 1950s!”
Sorry, gramps. The climate is changing. Get used to it.

I don’t get the “Skip Intro” button during the Kimmy Schmidt theme song. What kind of psychopath would press that?
On the other hand, using the “Skip Intro” button consistently on House of Cards will regain you a year of your life.

I would hope the wizard equivalent of the FBI automatically places on a watchlist anyone sorted into Slytherin.

While everyone is hating on Trump, Hillary would like to remind you that she also should never be president.

The bubble I’m in is that I don’t know anyone who has gone to the theater to watch a Transformers movie beyond the first one.

We’ve declared war on France and its ally, the environment. Good.

We can sign all the treaties we want, but the environment will never stop trying to kill us. That’s just its nature.

Hillary 2020: “I’m giving you one more chance”

If we were really one non-binding agreement away from planetary destruction, we were never going to last very long.

Wow. People are freaking out about this leaving the Paris Accord almost as much as they did about the covfefe tweet.

The left tomorrow: “Here’s another reason we think Mike Pence is creepy…”

Kathy Griffin and Bill Maher should get together and do a comedy special that no one will book anywhere.

“I’m sorry. Someone has murdered your family.”
“You need to find that killer and get his party affiliation so I know how outraged to be!”

The Democrats are now prosecuting secondhand racism because they’re afraid a few people still take them seriously on that issue.

For the first time, I played for my kids a Weird Al Yankovic song parodying a song they’re familiar with. It. Blew. Their. Minds.

I only support firing comedians when they become unprofitable.

The Iron Fist is a good superhero for any problem that can be solved by a glowing fist or a billion dollars.

I told my daughter to toughen up and she said only boys needed to be tough so I had to mansplain feminism to her.

I somewhat agree with socialism that I don’t deserve my money but I vehemently disagree with socialism that anyone else does.

I’m hearing rumblings about problems in the Middle East.

In the alternate universe where Trump could be elected president, “Reality Winner” does seem like the sort of name someone would have.
By the way, I’m from Earth 5. I’m not sure how I got here, but it’s a really silly place and I’d like to get home.

Things are pretty miserable here for a rich country with no actual problems.

Having finished it, Iron First definitely was the weakest of the Netflix Marvel series.
One of the biggest problems was the lead. Was he a man of action? Naive child? No one really seemed to know.

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Random Thoughts: Body Slamming and Memorial Day

Is anyone who saw the original Top Gun in theaters even still alive?

Reagan once piledrived a reporter into a folding table and no one cared. We had the Soviets to worry about.

“Should this politician go to jail for–”

Does this Gianforte scandal prove the country isn’t yet ready for The Rock to run for president?

“Maybe we spend more time focusing how our ultimate goals are the same and work together?”
left and right body slam me into a coffee table

“More like ‘Blunder Woman’!” – Good line for your movie review if Wonder Woman is no good.

My 14 y.o. dog got in the trash, and I’m just happy she’s still active enough for that.

Greg Gianforte won a mandate for body slamming reporters.

My guess is Wonder Woman is a decent movie which is why the studio has stayed away from SJW nonsense unlike with girl Ghostbusters.

When does the concept of “President Trump” stop being surreal?

On Memorial Day, I like to remember my father who served 2 years in the Army and passed away in 2012 from ailments related to Agent Orange exposure.
We live very peaceful lives in this country, but it took a lot of sacrifice to get us here.
A lot of talk about “privilege,” but we need more talk about duty and what we can do to honor what were given by the sacrifice of others.

We need to get better at shunning dishonest partisans, especially those who purport to have the same beliefs as us.

Cleaning out old miscellaneous cords. Found an s-video cable — hard to imagine a scenario where I’ll need that again.

I hope the new DCEU movie reveals that Wonder Woman’s mother is also named Martha.

I still don’t get why Batman wanted to kill Superman at the end. I guess because that Batman just loves loves murder.
“I only have one rule: Murder everyone!”

The president is dumb and you should not depend on him. This is not new.

President Zuckerberg? They’re really raising the stakes for the sequel to The Social Network.

In a free speech society, we need to get better at ignoring idiocy rather than getting worked up into a tizzy by it. Don’t give the attention-seekers attention.

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Random Thoughts: The Orb!

For fun, I’d sometimes Sonny Bunch the kids and argue Team Rocket are really the good guys. Made my daughter so mad that wife made me stop.

The Trump presidency has become so exhausting. Can you believe we have well over seven more years of this?

Rompers are now the de facto uniform of the #RESISTANCE

Both Trump and Hillary were treated horribly during the election.
That’s not to say they were treated unfairly, though.

Trump’s agenda is constantly being undermined by the deep state, the secret, underwater government led by Aquaman.

“This is just like from the Handmaiden’s Tale when Bob Handmaiden fought Dumbledore!” -modern political commentary

I’m at the “I’m sorry I made fun of Jeb” stage.

My sources are telling me that what the FBI found so exonerates Trump that he’s going to be reverse-impeached and serve two extra years.

I pretended to be Supreme Court Justice and hung out in their cafeteria and heard they’ve obtained the dark orb that nullifies pardon power.

Only hope I had of Trump presidency is that he might lose his temper and bite someone like the Saudi King in the face.

I want a president who’d chuck the Saudis’ stupid medal in their faces and say, “We don’t need you! We’ll make our own oil using SCIENCE!”

We keep saying “Read another book!” when people make Harry Potter political references, but are we sure they didn’t just watch the movie?

Why didn’t Saruman just show up in person?

Finally, making a Harry Potter political reference would actually be appropriate.

You just can’t visit Saudi Arabia and have any dignity, can you?

Every breaking story for this next week better be orb related.

What if the Dow skyrockets tomorrow? We’d have to assume it’s because of the power of the orb. TRUMP MUST STEAL THE ORB!

Will people stop doubting Trump now? Any lesser president would have been destroyed by the orb.

Remember when Obama refused to touch the orb because he feared the darkness inside? But Trump embraced the darkness. He is stronger now.

Don’t take any of this as an endorsement of the orb’s dark power; I’m just trying to analyze the political ramifications.

I would rank Trump’s “I shall control the orb; it shall not control me” speech as his most presidential so far.

It was weird how at Norte Dame Pence screamed “TRUMP HAS DOOMED US BY TOUCHING THE ORB!” and the students were right to walk out on him.

People are calling Trump a hypocrite using his old tweets about how no one should ever touch the orb, but you have to understand the context.

CNN is reporting that staring into the orb has driven Trump mad. This is more fake news.

Some are saying that Trump’s vow to destroy all who question the orb is unconstitutional. If so, our Constitution should be disregarded.
The Constitution was written by weak-willed fools who doubted the power of the orb. They are dead now. But the orb lives.

Ranks ranked:
5. Colonel
4. Admiral
3. Commander
2. Sergeant
1. Moff

My sources are telling me the Supreme Court justices are going to form together into one giant justice and fight Trump.

If Sean Hannity were fatter and I were meaner, I’d call him “Sean Manatee.”

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