Random Thoughts: Repealing the ACA and Comic Book Movies

If you’re in middle class, ACA feels like the president took a dump on you and wants you to be grateful he deigned you worthy of his time.

Can’t all the people who like abortion fund abortion and all the people who don’t like abortion fund miniature American flags?

In doing a live Facebook video of torturing a disabled man, what exactly was the best case scenario outcome those teens were hoping for?

“I can have ice cream for breakfast if I say so! I’m infalbubble!” -Kid Pope, new show I’m pitching

Your rights never require federal funding of particular entities. Well, maybe the military.

What would happen if all the people yelling about PP being defunded funded PP? We’d be a free a country with people exercising freedoms.

We have a giant stupid government of people who think they’re immune to math. Any cut in federal spending should be celebrated.

The way things are going, that wall will be built between middle America and the coasts. Doubt we can get Mexico to pay for that.

The ACA was dishonestly sold, and now people dishonestly defend it pointing to those who got coverage while ignoring legitimate grievances.
Maybe some people got coverage who didn’t have it AND others got completely screwed.
Of course, the argument for the ACA was never “The middle class needs to pay more for worse coverage to fund everyone else.”
So either the president was too dishonest or incompetent to know what the result would, but he owes a huge apology to millions of Americans.
If you want to save the ACA, the first step is to apologize to those hurt by it. Everyone is instead continuing to be arrogant and dishonest.

“So what do you do?”
“I’m the pope.”
narrows eyes “Aren’t you kind of young for a pope?”
opening theme

How about a resolution not contesting the results of the election but just saying that the whole thing was really stupid.

What if Mexico pays for the wall in pesos? No stores here accept those. It would be useless to us.

Here’s Rowdi. We got her 11 years ago this month. We were told she was 3 years old at the time. She’s probably older now.
I was hoping she’d slow down a little when she got older, but she still lives up to her name.

No matter how many awful films M. Night Shyamalan makes, I keep rooting for him to make a comeback b/c of how good his first few films were.

Suicide Squad was such a mess. How do you invest over a hundred million in a movie at not make sure it’s at least decently plotted?
And how do so many jokes miss? There are countless funny people you can pay to make sure your jokes are actually funny.
So so dumb. It was alternately too dark and too schmaltzy (“I’m not going to lose my new family!”).
It says a lot that the least bad thing about the DC movie universe so far is Ben Affleck as Batman.
My advice: Put the Arrowverse people in charge of the movies. They actually understand comic books and fun.
And both DC and Marvel: Please learn how to make a memorable villain.

Maybe smaller budgets would help. You have to get more creative if you can’t just fill the screen with a bunch of CGI nonsense.
I’d say the most consistently good comic book material has been the Marvel Netflix series.
They never have quite enough material to fill 13 episodes, but otherwise usually pretty solid.

To me, the Marvel movies are like high quality junk food. Never great, but you always look forward to it and are almost never disappointed.
The worst of the Marvel universe were the first two Thor movies which were entertaining to watch while leaving almost no impression.

The 22 episode American season is kinda insane. No hour long show can really fill that up well, though many try admirably.
Not as insane as the 3 episode British season (or series, as they call is), though.

If you believe Barack Obama is a good president everyone should be grateful for, this whole Trump thing has to be even more confusing.

If you like celebrities lecturing people on politics, you’re as horrible a human being as Trump.

If you weren’t very critical of Barack Obama, you’re not going to have a lot of cache being critical of Trump.
Republicans barely listened to other Republicans critical of Trump. Why the hell would they care what a Democrat thinks?

If Star Wars Episode VIII picks up right where the last one left off, will the opening scroll just be short novelization of Episode VII?

Who pays attention anymore when Democrats scream racism at a Republican?
They’re rhetoric when confronted with an active Klansman or Mitt Romney is exactly the same. Dems are useless on that issue.

Some people hate Republicans. Some people hate Democrats. Can’t we compromise and hate them both?

How can you have comprising information on Trump that’s worse than what we already know? His awfulness goes to 11?

I missed the speech. Did he apologize for what his bumbling did to my health insurance?

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Random Thoughts: Entering the Year of Trump

My wife remembers seeing the Sinbad genie movie in the early 90s and got angry when I told her it doesn’t exist.

Working from home, I now know why there are office that let you bring your dog but not ones that let you bring your cat.

I’ve heard some alarming reports that Donald Trump is close to obtaining nuclear weapons.

Half the movies you enjoyed as a kids never actually existed.

Weird. Some people remember as a kid seeing a version of Die Hard that wasn’t a Christmas movie.

Helped my mom get on Twitter so she could follow what Trump is up to.

The problem with the arguments that Die Hard isn’t a Christmas movie is that they make you bad and wrong.

There’s a big difference between Christmas movies – like Die Hard – and movies just set during Christmas – like Die Hard 2.

“Be careful of the woods, my child. They are filled with clowns and Hillary Clinton.”

Is there a final Santa Clause movie where someone murders Tim Allen and has to take his place?

I’m pretty convinced that white-gold/blue-black dress has something to do with that alternate universe Sinbad genie movie.

Hidden Figures was really good. Great and inspiring story. Interesting juxtaposition of “this hasn’t been done before” of breaking gender/race barriers and getting men into space.

The 80s were so authoritarian. Remember “Skate or Die”? Now you have the freedom not to skate.

I’d rather have a terrible president everyone admits is terrible than a terrible president most of the media props up as smart and good.

I don’t get why anyone wants a state in the Middle East. Terrible neighborhood. Don’t see it gentrifying any time soon.

If you want to hack an election, can download election hacking code from GitHub. Can only swing election to major party, though.

At least we don’t have to worry about a new Cold War since we’re going to have a president who LOVES Russia.

If I’m ever a rockstar, I’m going to drink Rockstar energy drink for energy for rocking. I’ll also do similar if I’m turned into a monster.

I was thinking of telling my wife she looked pretty today, but I saw what happened with Steve Martin and his Carrie Fisher tweet.

#NeverTrump had little to no effect on voting, putting them on the same footing as Hollywood celebrities and the entirety of the MSM.

We have a bunch of weird dishonest pundits commenting on weird dishonest politicians.

Hey. A new article on why Trump is bad. This could change everything.

Are there any crazy schemes left to try and stop Trump? Petition John Roberts not to swear him in?
Quickly amend Constitution with a “no Trumps” clause?
Have Obama surrender country to Canada so they get to appoint our leader?
It was just cute watching people earnestly cling their hopes to idiotic ideas and it’s better than mass depression.

Don’t get yelling “Allahu akbar!” and killing people. “God is great!” seems like something you should yell before throwing out free candy.
“Ooh! Free candy! God really is great!”

What if Bernie had lost to Trump? We’d now have smug Hillary people saying how she’d have easily won. We’re not the worst timeline.

Kubo and the Two Strings was really good (and really beautiful). Shame it didn’t seem to find an audience.

Going to constantly hear about Trump for all the foreseeable future. Don’t know what Greatest Generation went through, but it wasn’t that.

The iOS version has poor controls and less features, but when you’re bored on a rainy day, you know what they say: “Any port in a storm.”

No one I know voted for Trump. Or for Hillary. I’m very lonely.

Trump seems like the villain from a little kid’s cartoon – bumbling and loud mouthed, not threatening. He’d be a good member of Team Rocket.
“Team Rocket has taken over the White House! We have to stop them before they steal Pikachu!”
But what does this make Hillary? Who is outwitted by Team Rocket?

The ethics committee should disband. There hasn’t been any ethics in Congress for years, so what’s its purpose?

I don’t think I could be president because I wouldn’t be able to help myself from punching most foreign leaders if I got close to them.
Or maybe I should be president.

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Random Thoughts: Christmas and Trump

As part of my work setup, I have a MacBook Pro, a Surface Pro, and an iPad Pro. Really makes me feel like some sort of… not amateur.

The obvious problem in our presidential election system is not the electoral college but what made our choices Trump or Hillary.

So we’re really going with “fake news” as the big threat facing this nation? Our problems just keep getting dumber.

f the work you can do for a business is worth less than $15 an hour, it should be illegal to hire you.

Seems kind of insane how DNC forced Hillary as the nominee, but it makes sense as a devious Russian plot to get Trump elected.

If left want people to get outraged at something about Trump, they need to quiet down every so often. They’re like dogs constantly barking.

Maybe this is just 80s nostalgia talking, but I don’t quite trust those Russians.

Before Obamacare, you could go bankrupt if you got sick. After Obamacare, you go bankrupt from premiums before you get sick.

My only concern about Rex Tillerson is how many white papers he’s written about extracting oil from irradiated countries.

So are we finally going to have that war with Russia all the 80s movies promised us?

The left will do anything to stop Trump other than introspection.

We’re past the time for game theory. It’s time for game facts.

I’m willing to give Drilly McOilman a shot. Businessmen don’t like global conflict; it gets in the way of da money.

I liked the optimism in Rex Tilleson’s released statement. “All the world’s oil is mine! Sweet sweet oil!”

Know how every Christmas the president dresses up as HoHoHo-bama and takes the toys of rich children? Never found out what he does with them.

The Hillary biopic should end with her realizing she didn’t need all that ambition when she had the love of who she needed most: Wall Street

If I’ve noticed any pattern to things lately, expect Trump to increase his lead due to faithless electors.

Trump rushes out of his meeting with Kanye West
“Is it too late to change my pick for Secretary of State?!”

Every day Trump will get more awful and his critics will get even more awfuler.

Usually, $10 would be a steal for a brand new Mario game, but for some reason it seems like a lot on iOS.

Is everyone still talking about Trump? Election is over; time to forget about that guy.

Prediction: We’ll all grow to love Trump, and he’ll be reelected in the largest landslide. And then we’ll all die in a nuclear holocaust.

If Trump is illegitimate because 54% oppose him, was Bill Clinton even more illegitimate?
Or am I being silly to pretend any of these sorts of things are actual arguments?

You’re not going to make any progress continuing to focus on how awful Trump is. You need to focus on in what ways you’re worse.

Let’s calm down. We’re all going to get through this.
Well, most of us will.
A good number will.
There will be survivors.

I looked and there is no talking Luke Cage tree ornament that says “Sweet Christmas!” We are a broken society and Trump is our ruler.

Why would you assume I’ve heard of all the minor reindeer but not the most famous reindeer of all? You’re why we have Trump.

I need to know more about what holidays you’re celebrating before I’ll decide whether I want them to be happy or not.

“You may remember me from such films as Spawn and Project: Alf. I’m here to tell you DISMANTLE DEMOCRACY!”

Do people remember that 57% “voted against” Bill Clinton, or is that down the rage memory hole?

I’m raising funds to recount the votes in the electoral college. I will need $70 million dollars. This is not a scam.

Congratulations to Colin Powell for coming in third in the presidential election.

Daughter has started pronouncing her Rs but it’s caused her to drop any Os that are in front of an R which is endlessly amusing.

Now that we’re absolutely certain Trump is going to be president, can we stop talking about him?

Why $15 an hour and not $14? Or $16?

Trump has to have a vulnerability. How was Wario ultimately defeated?

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Random Thoughts: Taiwan Talking

Buzzfeed is always on the search for worst bigots than themselves and always failing.

To a crying baby, daddy is the “Is Pepsi okay?” of parents.

We need to keep our country’s Constitution strong to help with saving throws.

Anyone want to start a party based around classical liberalism and free markets? Warning: It’s probably not going to be very popular.

With daughter collecting superheroes, realized there’s few good super heroines, especially ones who arent just girl versions of male heroes.
I guess there’s Jessica Jones, but I don’t want my daughter emulating her.

Now Trump knows if his phone rings and the caller id says “Taiwan” he’s supposed to do the smart person thing and flush it down the toilet.

Got a new PC (a Surface Pro 4). Now to use that dedicated Chrome bootstrapping program, Internet Explorer.

We tried smart people who play by the rules, and they all failed horribly. Now it’s time for a dumb person who doesn’t play by the rules!

Technology is taking our jahbs!

I barely made it through the election. I honestly have no idea how we last four years of constantly talking about Trump.
And seeing the opposition, it’s probably going to be eight.

Would Amazon like it if someone made a robot that constantly innovates ways to make people’s lives better? Then they’d all lose their jobs.

So is there anyway in Windows 10 to make it when you adjust volume there isn’t this giant thing that pops up taking up half the screen?

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Random Thoughts: Settling Into the Idea of a Trump Presidency

There was huge and very successful effort to suppress minority vote in the presidential election. It’s called “nominating Hillary Clinton.”

People on the left: If you want to learn from this, stop focusing on why everyone else is horrible and focus on why you are horrible.

“If we hate and marginalize a large group of people, good things will happen!” -racists, leftists

If California secedes, Trump is going to make them pay for their wall.

I hope Donald Trump does well as president, which means him not doing a lot of things he’s proposed to do.

The DNC leadership needs to get purged. I’d say the same for the RNC, but that ain’t gonna happen now. I think I got purged.

Trump appointing climate denier head of the EPA, education denier as Secretary of Education, and country denier as Secretary of State.

From a feminist perspective, it did seem kind of silly we were going to have our first woman president be the spouse of a previous president.

It’s wrong that Supernatural is still so much fun in it’s 12th season.

I still can’t believe what happened. Didn’t anyone read the New York Times’ endorsement of Hillary?

Here’s a way of looking at it: The government is the worst part of our country, so we should get the worst person we can find to head it.

I think Nate Silver has earned a victory lap for this election even more so than he did in 2012.

It’s like the left don’t understand there are other bad things in this world than racism. That can’t be your sole argument.
“I know we ignore all your concerns, but you have to vote for this corrupt plutocrat to fight racism!”

It’s kind of terrifying that the air around us is filled with invisible creatures that want to eat us -though usually they wait until we die.

We all know 2016 has been a crappy year, but when was the last really good year?

“We keep yelling ‘Bigot!’ at people, and yet they persist in existing! I don’t get it!”

Should probably wait until President Trump does something worth protesting. So like late January.

I hope Trump keeps tweeting. The only reason to stop him is so we can pretend he’s something he isn’t.
Well, maybe that and national security.

We should amend the Constitution that the winner of the popular vote in a presidential election gets a nifty plaque.

I’d be ecstatically happy if the most embarrassing thing Trump does in foreign affairs is vomit on the prime minister of Japan.

The left freaking out and overreacting about Trump is normalizing him because that’s what they’d do about any Republican.
Can they do something new – like a stunned silence – so people don’t start thinking he’s just an average Republican?

I think the most effective way to deal with Trump would be to ignore him. No law says you have to cover the president.

I was really concerned about the crisis of Americans only reading fake news, but it ends up that was an Onion article.

More like Steve Ban-Him. #PoliticalCommentary

Trump told me to come in tomorrow to interview for being Secretary of State. Do you know if he’s talking to other candidates?
Anyone know how much I can negotiate on pay?

I think strategy is put kids movie on Netflix so kids will watch over and over and demand a DVD when it disappears from Netflix.

“I want to watch Minions movie!”
“Not on Netflix anymore.”
“This means nothing to me because I’m 3. Fulfill my request, father.”

One of the worst ways to find out you’re adopted has to be traveling back in time to kill your grandfather and failing to create a paradox.

Booing is okay, but not even a serial killer deserves getting lectured by actors.

For those who badmouth 2016, remember that we’re living in the golden age of television. And apples. So many delicious apple varieties.

All politicians should be booed all the time everywhere.

I can already tell that 2020 is going to be a close race between Trump’s own awfulness and the awfulness of his loudest detractors.

A) Trump is awful.
B) The Hamilton cast’s “I hope you learned from us” lecture was extremely arrogant and emblematic of why Trump won.
C) I hope emblematic is an actual word used correctly. Sometimes my brain hands me odd vocabulary and I just assume it knows what it’s doing.

What are the betting odds on Trump completing a full term?

Finished Luke Cage. The Netflix Marvel series just keep getting better and better.
I thought highlight was the actress who played Misty Knight. Main villain was kinda hokey, though. Secondary villains were very well done.
Actually, almost everyone was a complex character except main villain who apparently had an evil (and crazy) switch flipped in the past.

Kids are watching Dinosaur Kings and now I have to keep explaining there’s nothing in paleontological evidence about special attacks.

How do so many people not know Nazis are bad? Do kids not play Wolfenstein in school anymore?

Becoming president seems like a really good business opportunity for Trump.

My fear is the very legitimate and important criticisms of Trump will get buried under dumb partisan criticisms of him.

Despite fitting in your lower abdomen, your intestines are 20 feet in length. So they’re laid out much like an IKEA.

I don’t start my new job until next week, but my wife is buying Honeycrisp apples like we’re rich people.

We got our depressing election result. Can’t believe people are so worked up because they really wanted the other possible depressing result.

The place to call chicanery was the primary, not the general. How’d we end up with those two as our options?

I described to my 6yo what the movie Die Hard is and she said, “How is that a Christmas movie?” Ugh. I hope she isn’t one of those people.

I don’t like these Batman toys made for little kids. I don’t care if it’s for a 3yo; Batman doesn’t smile.

People rightly criticized Trump for not condemning David Duke, but isn’t not condemning Fidel Castro even morally worse?

Are there really people on the left who don’t understand Fidel Castro was horrible? I thought that was just vicious slander about them.

The main opposition to Trump is going to be led by people with “nuanced” views about Fidel Castro. We’re doomed.

Whether Hitler or Castro, I wish we lived in a country where we could all just agree that murderous dictators are bad.

Fidel Castro was a freedom fighter – if he found freedom anywhere in his country, he fought it.

“How could people choose ignorant racists over us, enlightened liberals? BTW, a murderous dictator who oppressed his country is good.”

Romney would add a nice odd couple element to our new White House reality show.

Never understood stuffing. Soggy bread is something we usually seek to avoid. That’s why we have toasters.

Right needs to handle its racists and left needs to handle its people who respond to the litany of abuses of Castro with “free healthcare!”

One of my favorite movie scenes has to be Johnny Depp asking Danny Trejo if he’s a Mexican or a Mexican’t.

I liked Finding Dory, but why were they throwing whole fish to a whale shark, a filter feeder?
Also, I don’t think clams can talk.

Wouldn’t having the electoral college take the presidency away from Trump basically end this country? Do people really mean that seriously?
We have our horrible new president. Deal with it. Stop trying to get some other horrible president who wasn’t elected.
Do people really want like a military coup on top of all this nonsense?

Won’t you take me to
They stopped allowing
Uber cars

It should count for something that Hillary won by over 2 million votes in Presidential Election: The Home Game.

Never before has someone been able to completely dominate the news with so little effort.

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Random Thoughts: Election Reactions (Including Crow to Eat)

Voting is the state trying to get your fingerprints on the murder weapon.

According to Exit Polls, people prefer a glowing red sign flush to the wall.

Make sure to UV scan people’s “I Voted” stickers to confirm they’re not counterfeit.

No matter who you vote for, I won’t get angry. I know how horrible the person is you’re voting against.

So we’re all just waiting to see how Bill Mitchell responds when it becomes clear Trump lost? [Ed. Note: Bill Mitchell was right about everything I was very wrong]

I hope the Trump concession speech is epic. No reason to hold back. [Ed. Note: Trump gave a very nice victory speech]

I hope in Hillary’s victory speech she thanks all the people who voted for Trump in the primary since that will be the only reason she won. [Ed. Note: I am an out of touch elitist]

No where in the Constitution does it give the government the right to spend our tax dollars on “I Voted” stickers.

I don’t think any of us are mentally prepared for a Trump win. Like a meteor hitting – possible but don’t think it will actually happen.

As much as I always dreamed of Hillary losing the presidency, I’m scared.

The only winner in all this is Nate Silver.

Apparently there are hidden Trump voters. Some could be in your house right now. Maybe standing right behind you.

You encourage people to go out and vote and this is what happens.

People thought Trump was a plant to get Hillary elected, but what if it’s the other way around?

If Hillary loses, it’s not because of the emails. That’s just a symptom of her huge problems.

The only surviving pundits will be Nate Silver and the Dilbert guy.

What if Bill Mitchell is the only sane one among us?
The ground game was in their hearts! It was!

Can Mexico even afford the wall?

So we’re looking at a Trump presidency with really confused Republican majorities in House and Senate.

What’s gong to happen to the taco trucks?

You Dems weren’t listening much on limiting executive power the past 8 years; want to revisit that?

Let this be a lesson: Whatever power you give the government, remember that one day it will be wielded by a Trump.

“We just weren’t patronizing and smug enough!” -left-wingers right now

It seemed like Trump was about as awful as possible. He just wasn’t more awful than what’s considered normal for D.C.

We had already explained to the kids an awful lady was going to be our next president. I don’t even know how to explain this to them.

Left, right, all skin colors and religions – we’re just going to have to hug it out and get through this, okay?

“One in three of my simulations had this happening.” -Nate Silver to whoever is near him at the sports bar

Trump is the worst man to have ever run for our presidency. He’s apparently not the worst person, though.

I so wanted to gloat on a Hillary loss, but I’m too much in shock. I can’t even imagine what this all means.

I guess we’re not going to get our historic first president who is a spouse of a previous president.

I hope the left is ready for the soul-searching that the GOP is apparently avoiding.

I still don’t even understand how it’s physically possible to take Trump seriously. He’s this 90s novelty act.

Hillary was taking what everyone hates about politicians and then rubbing everyone’s faces in it. Bad gamble.

A lot of talk on what GOP has done wrong to lose all minorities but not a lot of talk on what Dems have done wrong to lose all whites.

We have 4 years ahead of us of talking about Trump and over analyzing the dumb things he says. FOUR YEARS!

The only one who will be able to beat Trump in 2020 will be Kanye West.

We thought Obama would be great for race relations and things got worse. Seems like Trump will be horrible for race relations so maybe…

Despite my best attempts, I’m apparently one of the elites with no idea what’s going on.

An important lesson is that yelling “Bigot!” doesn’t cause white people to magically disappear.

Nate Silver wins the Price Is Right for guessing the closest to Trump’s chances without going over.

Looking at how Trump changed the voting patterns, it’s not clear now that Rubio would have done better or even that he’d have won.

The Dems soul-searching needs to start with figuring out what they’ve done to completely chase away white voters.
A big part of their election strategy has been to put everyone in racial groups with one bad racial group to be the enemy. That can’t stand.

So I’m unemployed as of this week and now Trump is going to be president. I’m in a weird place right now.
BTW, if you some companies in the Austin area who need a software/firmware engineer (with mobile experience) hit me up.

Hopefully Trump can put Nate Silver in his cabinet as his math sorcerer.

Political correctness bullies people into not saying what they think, but it never changes what they think.
Political correctness has become a way to avoid addressing differences, and has thus made us weaker as a united people.

So what’s happening to Trump TV?

The president is terrible. Wait, is Trump president yet? Well, whoever it is, the statement stands.

Every time I’ve checked Twitter today, I’m like “Wait, did that really happen last night?” Hasn’t really sunk in.

In understanding Trump, can we finally all admit that Obama is a mediocre person who was elected for shallow reasons? Yes we can!

The false assumption of leftists is that they’re morally better than the supposed racists and misogynists they sneer at.

Bigots dismissing the concerns of large groups of people – that’s what unites racists and much of the left.

Who knows? Maybe really good things will come of the Trump presidency. We were wrong about everything else so far.

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Random Thoughts: Pre-Election Explosion

There is no political view so “right” it excuses you for being an awful person.

If I were Hillary, I’d block the Michael Moore film as it has much more risk of making things go the other way.

I won’t accept the results of this election. It’s just way too stupid to take that seriously.

The morally worst people in this election are those who give cover to corrupt, arrogant people in power.

Democrats concern over talk of rigged elections is as sincere as their concern for victims of sexual assault.

Trump’s remarks are not worth fretting over. There is no integrity in this idiotic election to preserve.

If we were smart, none of us would accept the results of an election that gave us either Trump or Hillary. This is obviously a sick system.

I think we should all make a pledge that, no matter who wins, we will refuse to accept the election results. #IRefuse

Hillary is everything that is wrong with politics. Trump is everything that is wrong with people.

We can’t question the integrity of the election that’s given us the two worst candidates we’ve ever seen.

When the Democrats questioned the election results in 2000, we never recovered. Things have been horrible since then.

Why do people keep acting like #NeverTrump has any ability to help Trump win? Are #NeverTrump powerful wizards?

You voted to burn down the GOP. Mission accomplished. Stop pretending you were voting to stop Hillary.

“I really want to stop Hillary, but let’s make it a challenge and nominate the dumbest, most obnoxiously awful human being we can find.”

Yes we said “Don’t put your face on a hot stove!” but you did and the obvious happened. It’s probably our fault.

My final advice for Trump: If you’re going to lose, lose crazy. We keep thinking we’ve seen your worst; keep proving us wrong.

All the Trumpkins will look up to #NeverTrump and shout “Use your magical powers to win the election!”and we’ll look down and whisper “no.”

There’s a subset of Republicans who said “Don’t vote for Obamacare!” and “Don’t vote for Trump!” and are blamed for failure of both.

What’s cultural Marxism? Is that stuff influenced by the movie Duck Soup?

Trump is so awful he keeps distracting from how awful Hillary is – which is more relevant if she’s going to be president.

If you really hate Trump, the worst punishment you can give him after this election is to never mention him again.

Criticism of Clinton does not equal support for Trump. Criticism of Clinton just means you’re sentient.
Repeat with Clinton and Trump swapped.

It would be funny if Trump won and it was because of one of those efforts to get low-information voters to the polls like Rock the Vote.

There’s so so many things to criticize Hillary as a politician or as a human being in general that there’s no reason to say anything sexist.

What if Trump wins and then he’s really good president and then we have to apologize for making fun of him and then he sexually assaults us?

The first task for President Hillary should be uniting a deeply scarred country. For GOP: appointing a special prosecutor to lock her up.

The people who keep excusing all of Hillary’s corruption and dishonesty are her deplorables and irredeemables.

The silver lining of this election is that no matter what happens, someone who very much deserves to lose is going to.

The best advice I can give the GOP is that after Trump loses you banish him to the phantom zone.

You know Wikileaks emails are all true b/c Hillary’s people keep saying they could be altered without ever pointing out something altered.

Playing Zelda Twilight Princess with the kids and it kinda seems like the Upside Down from Stranger Things was ripped off the Twilight Realm.
There are A LOT of similarities. I could do a listicle of it if I were the listicle making person.
Then again, the darker parallel universe isn’t that original in the first place. Not even first Zelda with it.

I gave up on Walking Dead after the first season. Great pilot, but meh after that. Read over 100 issues of the comics, though.

Of course it’s a rigged a election. That’s how we ended up being told our only choices are the insanely horrible Trump and Hillary.

We want to elect the best person in the country president. We’re told our choices are Trump or Hillary. #Rigged

Prediction: On the night of November 8th, Hillary will shout out her victory speech while being carted off in handcuffs.

The best strategy for the Trump campaign — as it has been for a while — is to get Trump trapped down a well until after Election Day.
“Sorry. No statement from Trump. He’s still trapped down a well where we can’t hear him. Imagine him saying something smart, though.”

Thanks to Hillary’s bad email practices, Weiner sexted all our state secrets to underage girls in ISIS.

Hillary just needs to calmly explain to the public that nothing will come of any FBI investigation of her because she is above the law.

“What should we call this type of flying insect?”
“A… fly!”
rubbing temples “It’s not even the only type of insect that flies, Carl.”

“No, no… the normal, responsible candidate is the one under FBI investigation.”

Not sure I’m great at these coding interview. When I feel there’s time pressure, my instinct is get it working and optimize later.

I have a feeling this election is saving its craziest moment for the season finale.

Bernie Sanders lacks basic math and reasoning skills, but I sure wish he was the one running against Trump and winning.

All the DNC leadership who forced Hillary on their party should resign if she loses. GOP leadership should resign regardless.

Just in case he wins, I better start working on my “who to blame” list for a Trump win now because it’s going to be pretty long.
Oh, crap… Am I on it?

Wow. Trump could actually win this if he could somehow stay out of the news until after Election Day.
Which is to say he can’t win this.

Maybe they should change the name of the Nintendo Switch to “Portable Skyrim.”

Game 7: When a baseball games becomes as exciting as a football game.

No more fear of goats! Everyone punch and disrespect goats! They are not our masters anymore!

It really seems like Trump would be running away with this election if he were only 5% less horrible and dumb.

If Trump wins the presidency, it will be like that Brexit vote, right? And we’ll just never actually get around to it?

I agree with Melania that we need to stop all these cyborg bullies. Maybe use an EMP grenade or something.

What would be the most boring outcome Tuesday? Hillary winning by a decent but non-landslide margin?

Anyone thought about making a political party around classical liberalism?
The Libertarian Party? No, I meant a serious one.

Is there any group out there that encourages low-informative, non-motivated voters to abstain from voting?

Has Nate Silver turned to dark math sorcery to try and make Trump win?

I forgot Trump has Secret Service agents assigned to him. Why don’t they ever keep him from shooting himself in the foot?

“This election is almost over. This horrible election is finally almost over…”
Sunday night sees clock go from 1:59AM to 1:00AM

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Random Thoughts: Rigged

Of course this would be a year when Election Day is as late in November as possible. #PleaseEnd

No desire to say “I told you so!” It was like telling someone not to put his face on a hot stove – just baffled the warning was even needed.

Bright side for the Republicans is they’ll probably do really well in the 2018 midterm… if their party is still around.

I’d just like to point out it is physically possible to vote for someone other than one of the candidates in the two major parties.

Wow! Ken Bone is almost as awful as people who feel the need to destroy some random citizen who ended up on TV!
Well, not quite that awful.

The Power Rangers movie is kinda depressing as it’s the first nostalgia-based movie made from a property I was too old to watch.

Language is a lossy compression algorithm for storing and transmitting ideas.

Basically we have two candidates who it would be much more appropriate for them to be in jail than the the White House.

After the election, the GOP should declare moral bankruptcy and do a restructuring.

Choice for president: Someone who should be in jail for sexual assault or someone who should be in jail for endangering national security

Trump was response to corruption, arrogance, and incompetence, but left now doubling down on corruption, arrogance, and incompetence.
Makes we wonder if this election is not the worst of whatever this phenomenon is but instead just the beginning.

The leaders on the right have been humbled, but things won’t get better until this happens to the left as well.

I don’t get The Magic School Bus. It’s about a witch teaching kids science?

Before you judge anyone too harshly for voting for Trump, remember that the other choice was Hillary.

I’ll understand grudging support, but enthusiastic support for either of the two candidates is a moral failing.

Partisanship – the special magic that can get evangelicals to not care about morality and feminists to not care about rape charges.

ME: I’m forming a new party around classical liberalism. Who wants to join?
CRUZ: I will!
ME: Sorry. It’s called the “No Ted Cruz” party.

No more talk of “rigged.” Let’s at least protect the integrity of our dumpster fire.

After we settle the issue of whether the media is biased, maybe we can get back to debating the color of the sky.

I wonder if that document with the phrase “quid pro quo” in it could be evidence of a quid pro quo.
That’s almost over the top damning. It’s like finding a memo with phrase “Hey, let’s embezzle!”

The horribleness of your party’s candidate is n and horribleness of other party’s candidate is n+1 and n keeps increasing toward infinity.

The most sporting way to hunt ducks is to wear a jet pack and rocket uppercut them.

Now that’s I’ve met Trump in person, I kind of like him. Wait, that wasn’t Trump; that was a pug with spaghetti noodles on its head.

So Hillary is really embracing the anti-third party “Don’t vote your conscience; vote Hillary” message.

If Trump wants to win, he really needs to shake things up. Does he have enough time left to grow a mustache?

The only possible happy ending to all this is at Hillary’s inauguration she’s taken away in handcuffs.

I’m not saying don’t vote for either Trump or Hillary. I’m just saying have some humanity and feel ashamed about it afterwards.

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Random Thoughts: Locker Room Talk

Donald Trump’s debate prep is yelling at random things.

So is the Democrat message really “Things are great domestically and in foreign affairs and you’re too stupid to notice. Yay status quo!”?

Are we saying this is what finally sinks Trump?Because we’ve thought that a number of times but he’s like a horror movie monster.

Again I ask: Who is left who doesn’t already know that Trump is a horrible human being?

You can’t replace Trump with Romney. Romney is just as bad. Remember how he was mean to a kid once in high school?

The prize for being less reprehensible than Trump is control of our nuclear arsenal.

What’s interesting is that as truly despicable Trump is, much of the left’s opposition to him is still partisan and disingenuous.

We’re in a very bad place, and no one of note has the moral high ground to offer a path out of it.

You have someone bragging about sexual assault and someone who smears victims of sexual assault. Vote for either you lack moral high ground.

There is a huge – HUGE – amount of hypocrisy in a party that tolerated Bill Clinton now acting like it cares about sexual assault.
That said, everyone in the GOP who at any point supported Trump should resign. I don’t know how you could ever trust their judgment.

Debate advice for Trump: Spend all your time attacking Hillary as she is awful. Don’t spend any time defending self as you’re indefensible.

It’s worth pointing out that Bill Clinton proves the left has never taken sexual assault very seriously, but that won’t save Trump.

They’re two awful candidates, and no one in good conscious should vote for either. But one of them is going to win.

And for the record, as over the top awful as Trump is, he’s still morally better than Ted Kennedy.
To be fair, though, my guess is Trump would behave like Ted Kennedy if he accidentally drowned a woman.

Maybe we should check the Constitution again and make sure we absolutely have to have a president.

Hillary takes classified data very seriously and Trump thinks Islamophobia is a shame.

I know how this ends! Russia finally hits the reset button and its 1991 again.

Donald Trump is the worst man to have ever run for president. What’s keeping him alive is people aren’t sure he’s worst person to have run.

Threatening to imprison your political opponent is an unacceptable and dangerous thing to say for anyone not running against Hillary.

If you have the Gear VR, check out At the Fork VR. I programmed it because I’m smart.

Can Trump and Hillary be co-presidents? I’m no longer worried what’s best for the country and just want to figure how best to punish them.

Trump is sorta like a moderate wished on a monkey’s paw for a GOP candidate who doesn’t care about social issues.

How is Paul Krugman fed in his bubble to make sure he never gets contaminated with outside information?

“I bring you spices from the orient!”
“All your ship’s cargo is pumpkins.”
“It’s fall.”

I still don’t get how the Republicans who rallied around Trump thought there was a greater than 1% chance it wouldn’t end horribly.

If locker rooms really do turn men into sociopathic rapists who should be locked away from society, maybe everyone should change at home.

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Random Thoughts: VP Debate

Nominating a thin-skinned dummy was a risky move, but it has a potentially horrible payoff.

It will be great to have a president who will stay up to 3am checking on our cyber.

On Election Day, I just want to stand at the polls shouting at everyone entering, “Nothing good will come of this!”

I don’t want Trump to win, but I do want to see an animatronic Trump at the Disney World hall of presidents.

One of the bad things about Trump is it’s giving people around Hillary more cover to… what’s the opposite of “Speak truth to power”?

Stopping Trump is a noble goal, but it’s not worth pretending Hillary isn’t horrible.

I don’t see how this tax stuff changes anything. It’s just another pebble on the mountain-sized pile of evidence that Trump is horrible.

Hallmark better have a Luke Cage tree ornament that says “Sweet Christmas!” or there will be hell to pay.

I honestly don’t care if anyone pays taxes other than for those who it would be a hypocrisy issue, i.e., they’re for higher taxes.

Voting is not a right. It’s a hack fix for how we imperfectly protect rights.
In a perfect world, you would have no vote or influence over someone else’s rights.
I agree with Bastiat that the goal of voting isn’t to get everyone to vote but to make voting as inconsequential as possible.

I hope on Election Day Arby’s sees record sales.

Why all the focus on the less than 1% #NeverTrump controls and not the 10% that Trump’s erratic behavior controls?

Trump seems to crater in the polls when he’s over the top horrible. Has he considered not being over the top horrible?

Man I hope this is the worst presidential election of my lifetime.

Social Security: the greatest program the government has ever made other than just throwing money down a hole.

Social Security is a Ponzi scheme that is only still limping along because you’ll go to prison if you don’t pay into it.

Wow. Interesting to see what an anti-Hillary argument looks like with a little discipline behind it.

I listen to podcasts at 2x speed. That’s what Kaine keeps reminding me of.

Has a VP debate ever actually had an effect on an election?

Pence doing what I recommend for Trump on scandals: Quick, huge lie then move on.

Is it helping Hillary to watch a woman completely fail at running a debate?

Did Kaine just say “There’s a lot of young people who weren’t born when Roe was decided?”

Pence is much better at lying than Kaine, Hillary, or Trump. All we want is a little polish.

Police keep telling people to stop calling them about clowns. Bullets don’t kill clowns, so they can’t do anything about it.

This is an odd year to make big money arguments about politics when Trump has survived spending relatively very little.

If the next debate is a townhall debate, good chance the candidates will finally get asked about all the clown attacks.

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Random Thoughts: First Debate

Wow. You found some new way in which Trump is awful? GAME CHANGER!

Every horrible thing the left are saying now about Trump they said about Mitt Romney, which is why no one listens to them.

Really, you think urging more people to vote is the solution? We’re in a hole, and the answer is more people digging?

How is urging more people to vote going to fix things? What’s the chance of the solution existing in those last few unmotivated voters?

We’ve been doing things like “Rock the Vote” for decades, and no matter the problems, the only solution is beat that drum harder.

Our current system got us Trump versus Hillary. That’s a complete breakdown. That’s not “More votes will fix everything!”

I didn’t even know that one actor and actress was married. I like Fight Club, though.

Remember: Hillary is the most qualified presidential candidate ever ever. So if she’s not a million times better than Trump at debate, failure.

Twitter is about creating dialogue – except about why they suspend people because that is to be done quietly with no explanation or recourse

Are we far enough away from Soviet Union that’s there’s no shame in using unexplained and arbitrarily enforced rules to disappear people?

The reason twitter bans might seems politically lopsided could be that the left are more likely to react to offense by demanding suspension.

Perhaps another way to reduce offense on Twitter would be to suspend the habitually offended. For their own mental health.

If the left want to convince people outside their echo chamber to not support Trump, they should try shrilly supporting Trump.

Man, what if Twitter starts suspending people for making Harambe jokes?

Don’t understand people who look at the Trump vs Hillary spectacle and say, “We need to encourage more low information voters to register!”

I think it’s good we get rid of the notion that there’s anyone left in either party who has any sort of principles.

Do you think whoever wins the presidential race will immediately get a Nobel Peace Prize for no reason again?

Don’t be surprised Cruz endorsed Trump. Bernie Sanders endorsed Hillary even though he seems crazy enough to actually be principled.

Remember: If you vote, whatever horrible outcome we get will have your fingerprints all over it and you’ll be hated by future generations.

Vote for whomever you think is the 2nd worst candidate ever nominated by a major party.

Just to be clear: Any time I’m pointing out how horrible one of the candidates is I’m still perfectly aware how horrible the other is.

When you have the ultimate establishment, status quo candidate, I don’t think it’s gong to look good if the moderator appears to help her.

This election comes down to whether you want same horrible or new horrible.

Good News: There’s only about a 40% chance Trump will win.
Bad News: There’s a 60% chance Hillary will win.

Genesis 13:10 should come with a spoiler alert.

Whoa. The NYT wrote an editorial against Trump. That’s what will finally do him in.

Congratulations on the Democrats for nominating a candidate widely considered worse than an ignorant, blowhard racist.

Hillary knows about as much about making jobs as she does emoting.

First woman presidential candidate running on accomplishments of husband and father.

In the debate, I thought Trump started strong and then became a rambling mess focusing on unproductive areas. Hillary was Hillary.

Tend to agree with people that Clinton won overall but unlikely to move the needle. But who knows. Crazy year.

Winner of these debates is going to be whoever is on the offense more since they’re both horrible people with no good defense of themselves.

Lester: “Would you have shot Harambe?”
Trump: “Yeah. I’d blow his brains out. No question. Wait, who is he again?”

I don’t think Hillary did that great. She just wasn’t too horrible while standing next to a turd.

Looking at the pundit consensus and how well that’s predicted things so far, Trump should be up by ten in the next polls.

Any time the candidates are on defense, they are losing because they are both indefensible.
Any time the candidates are on offense, they are winning because there is plenty horrible things to point out about the other.

At least we the two presidential candidates agree on something: Freedom gets in the way of stuff.

Instead of “Rock the Vote” they should call it “Feed the Machine.”

We need to take the oil and get control over the cyber. Neither of these require further explanation.

Trump’s key to winning is to keep hammering on law & order and present a realistic plan to finally create a Robocop.

14 years ago, Trump wrote out a statement about how he opposes a war in Iraq and buried it in a time capsule which he will dig up tomorrow.

To protest, hold a squat during the National Anthem. That proves the reason you’re not standing isn’t just because you’re lazy.

“Let’s put all our cyber in a box and lock it in Fort Knox. Some old school solutions for all this new tech stuff.”

How Hillary treated the women her husband sexually assaulted is fair game, but why pretend either candidate has character worth defending?

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Random Thoughts: Clown Invasion

From the leaked emails, Trump and Hillary come off poorly, but actually respect Colin Powell a little more.

It is job of late night clowns to engage in fisticuffs with evil hair man!

If you want to know why we’re stuck with Trump, the answers lies less in focusing on his awfulness than on Obama and Hillary’s awfulness.
And don’t forget Republican awfulness.

The two major candidates are shameless liars who only tell the truth when talking about how the other candidate is a shameless liar.

This is all to cover up the fact that Barack Obama was actually born in a hot air balloon floating over the North Pole.

So birtherism is so horrible it discredits Trump but not so horrible it discredits Hillary?

The hissy fits about Trump’s line on disarming Hillary’s bodyguards are why no attention is paid to legitimate criticisms about Trump.

Hillary’s attitude on birtherism is the same as on guns: Okay for people around her to have access to it to protect her, but no one else.

People are making great arguments that Trump is loudmouthed, racist, and dumb. They aren’t making great arguments that Hillary is preferable.

The biggest casualty of terrorism is narratives.

People need to understand that the reason so many don’t want to vote for Hillary is that could help elect Hillary.

“How can anyone vote for this obnoxiously horrible candidate?”
looks at other candidate
“Oh yeah.”

The reasons clowns are so scary is that there is documented evidence that clowns are real.

Can we do a ban on clowns entering this country?

Hillary just needs to be more personable – like not scream “I’LL SWALLOW YOUR SOUL” every time someone makes eye contact.

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Random Thoughts: Honest, Healthy Hillary

I’m sure Hillary is as healthy as she is competent.

Probably the easiest place to get Apple’s new AirPods will be a lost and found.

I’m kinda offended by the Spanish word for the color black whenever I see it. They need to change it.

Always wondered what Scrooge McDuck’s accountant thought of his plan to put his money in a vault he could swim in instead of mutual funds.

Trump vs. Hillary makes me think of at least two people who deserve to be placed in a basket of deplorables.

Hillary holds half of all Trump voters in complete contempt. And the other half. And most of her own supporters. She’s not a people person.

Anyone really enthusiastic for either Trump or Hillary is deplorable.

“OWN IT!” -Sean Hannity selling mattresses

Trump versus Hillary’s running mate what’s his face would probably be a landslide for bland.

All these Hillary health questions are nonsense. For a good-sized portion of each day, she’s able to walk under her own power.

My suggestion for the Hillary campaign: Start making the font for “Kaine” a bit bigger.

We’ll all believe whatever explanation Hillary gives for that clip of her collapsing because of her notorious honesty.

When Hillary left Chelsea’s apartment supposedly walking under her own power, I could see wires.

The human response would be sympathy for Hillary, but it’s hard with all the dishonesty and opaqueness.

Can’t believe sexist coverage of Hillary. Anyone who’s been around women know they’re frail creatures who collapse constantly for no reason.

So first she was “overheated” and now she has pneumonia. Look at all the trust Clinton engenders.

“She just overheated, that’s all. And… she has pneumonia! Yeah, that’s the ticket! Now I need to go home to my wife… Morgan Fairchild.”

If Hillary has pneumonia, does that mean she was trying to kill that kid she hugged?

Don’t carry water for Trump or Hillary. That takes away as much of your soul as a horcrux.

Not to cry racism, but how come no one had a problem with the national anthem before we had a black president?

Bill Clinton: “This is nothing new. She collapses all the time. Doctors say we should be concerned, but I don’t care.”

Sounds like Mike Pence is deplore-unable.

Hillary is going to hug deplorable racists and kill them with her pneumonia like she did that child.

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Random Thoughts: Sick Hillary

Why is their this debate on the definition for of “alt-right”? It’s the right wing from the upside down universe.

Remember that Twilight Zone where the guy walks out of his house to find taco trucks everywhere? That was terrifying.

Isn’t it now unAmerican to not like tacos?

It’s beyond absurd the idea of either Trump or Hillary being president.

Was a bit weirded out by the much darker, more serious The Tick on Amazon Prime. Not at all what I was expecting.

The amount of time spent on this Kaepernick nonsense is insane. We’re acting like he shot Harambe.

If you’re enthusiastic for Hillary, you’re a worse human being than Trump.

Rumors that Hillary is ill and most likely won’t live long make me more likely to vote for her.

There’s more to being a dad than bad jokes. But not a lot more.

Emperor Palpatine also looked very sickly, but he went on to serve for decades.

So I don’t have to “actually” you, if it swam or flew, it wasn’t a dinosaur.
And before anyone actuallies me, I’m referring to contemporaries of non-avian dinosaurs. Plenty of modern-day dinosaurs swim and fly.

If defeating Hillary blows away all other political concerns, you should have been screaming “Don’t nominate Trump!” during the primary.

Trump was a good candidate if burning it all down was important. If defeating Hillary or SCOTUS important, he was worst candidate to pick.

If you say nothing is more important than SCOTUS and defeating Hillary, but you weren’t against Trump in the primary, you’re a liar.

It is theoretically possible Trump could win, but that’s in God’s hands now. Stop playing pretend that National Review has say about that.

“And that’s all the new iPhone features. Oh, BTW, we removed the headphone jack. Bye!” :feed cuts:

Next they’re going to remove the ability to do a phone call on an iPhone and see if anyone notices.

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Random Thoughts: Be Woke

Both the Hillary and Trump campaigns would benefit from locking candidate in underground bunker and only letting surrogates talk for them.

I always thought “cons” was an abbreviation of “conservatives” but apparently those are two distinct groups on the right.

If #NeverTrump decided to put their full might behind Trump, I’d be surprised if they moved things one percentage point.

Anyone focusing on #NeverTrump is trying to pass blame, not win.

“Here’s Trump spokesman Ryan Lochte to explain how the election was rigged.”

The vote is rigged? That we have to choose between Trump and Clinton shows the whole system is rigged.

I’m not apologizing for my tone or anything I’ve said. Because I’m a winner.

With Obama paying hundreds of millions in ransom, I’m now worried about being kidnapped by Trump.

I always imagine Jesus turning to face the camera when he says the second sentence of John 20:29.

Most people think Hillary set up a personal email server for corrupt reasons, but it’s also possible she’s just an idiot with bad advisors.

When I ask my three-year-old what he did all day, he can never remember. I wonder if he’s an alcoholic.

Don’t get Harambe jokes. Nothing funny about how that plumber made him fall off the construction site. He wasn’t going to hurt that woman.

Advantage of Trump over Clinton is that more of the media recognizes him as awful and would continue to scrutinize him if he were elected.

What if Trump is underpolling because many of his supporters are incapable of human speech and thus can’t respond to pollsters?

How are some of you seeing Arthur Chu’s tweets? My understanding is he pre-blocks anyone who follows anyone other than Arthur Chu.

People being mysteriously disappeared for unexplained reasons is just part of Twitter’s charm.

An interesting strategy to try to reduce the amount of people being offended would be to ban the easily offended.

A great slogan for some activist, fair-trade coffee company: “Be woke.”

Gene Wilder was one of the greatest comic actors. Plus his name sounds like something a mad scientist would use for splicing DNA.

The “evolving superpowers” thing from the X-Men doesn’t happen in real life. Except for the electric eel.

Just found out about the SETI signal thing. If we’re visited by advanced aliens, make sure they don’t find out about Harambe.

I wonder what this election would be like if there was a libertarian alternative for president.

Where’s that article? My wife wears headphones all day and I haven’t been able to talk to her in weeks.

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