Archive for the ‘Random Thought’ Category

Random Thoughts: FIFA and Patriot Act

Wednesday, June 3, 2015 7:56 am

What is it about trains that makes them objects of endless fascination to small children and Democrats?

Texas sure has some interesting weather. Time to swim around the tornadoes on my way to work.

Anytime I watched a soccer game and saw all the people pretending to be excited by it, I said, “This has to be a scam of some sort.”

It’s good we have Bernie Sanders in the race for people looking for someone even older and less relevant than Hillary.

I’m bought a house in Texas. And I did it with a conventional loan this time like I’m a big boy.

Of course FIFA is corrupt. The reason we get all those boring 0-0 scores is because both teams are being paid to throw the game.

I’m looking forward to Pataki versus Sanders in the general election.

So how hard would it be to make it so you could hold the iPhone in portrait but it films in landscape?

Decided I’m going to die in Austin because I’m definitely never moving again.

Is Patriot Act where Whoopi Goldberg joined the Army to hide out from the mob?

Why does Siri always change the subject when I ask if she’s spying on me for the NSA?

At this point it would be easier if you announce if you’re not running for president. BTW, I have no announcement to make.

“I would like to take this opportunity to officially launch my campaign for president.” -Hillary in the first presidential debate

Reminder: You don’t get to choose whether criminals are armed. Only whether law abiding people are.

The whole investigation started when the FBI asked who was in charge of FIFA and thought they were given a clearly made up name.

People need to get better at sorting out when it’s society oppressing them and when it’s reality.

There’s little in this life I love as much as the extra syllable my 4yo daughter puts in “hamburger.”

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Random Thoughts: Supergirl and Letterman

Tuesday, May 26, 2015 7:52 am

So who are your top 25 GOP presidential primary candidates?

What I get from the Supergirl trailer controversy is that it’s not feminist to include things known to appeal to women.

I’d watch if they have over the top misogynist Superman. “Should call you Supper-girl, because you should be in the kitchen making my supper!”

The left feel they have a right to wield racism and sexism for the cause of “social justice.”

“Why’d you stop watching Game of Thrones?”
“Rape, murder, arson, and rape.”
“You said rape twice.
“I don’t like rape.”

Google Docs red-lined “Doctor” and asked “Did you mean ‘Docter’?” Did I go crazy?

My 2yo son bit me when I refused to help him with an iPad game. I admire his passion.

I used to stay up late and watch Letterman and then change channels to Conan. Haven’t watched any late night in ages, though.

My 4yo never gets my 80s movie references.

Surprised people settled where there are tornadoes. You’d think they’d take it as a signal to leave when the wind turns into a giant monster.

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Mad Men and Biker Gangs

Monday, May 18, 2015 8:06 am

So was the Black Widow movie sketch on SNL making fun of sexism or making fun of women for liking dumb romantic comedies over action movies?

Jeb Bush is the Schrödinger’s Cat of Iraq invasion.

If you’re upset about Mad Men ending, at least you have it’s spinoff to look forward to: Mad Max.

We obviously need to ban motorcycles. Smart Car drivers never form gangs.

The last Mad Men episode I saw was the one from the first season with the hobo. Will I be able to follow the finale?

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Random Thoughts: Blaming Obama and Trains

Thursday, May 14, 2015 8:14 am

There’s a lengthy review of my novel Superego at the SF magazine Perihelion.

Have some of you not bought my novel yet? Because that’s just weird.

The football throw guy cheated! He couldn’t throw the football as good as he throwed it!

How is all this police stuff news to everyone? If you ever watched an episode of Cops, they randomly murder like two people in each one.

I don’t follow as many women as men on Twitter, but in real life I stare at women more than men if that counts for anything.

Good way to end my 4yo’s questions and not look like bad guy:
“Why can’t I have ice cream for breakfast?”
“Because of a law President Obama passed.”

I keep confusing Liberty Mutual with the robot insurance people.

I think it would be really symbolic of our times if we increased funding for trains and took it out of space exploration.

Could Google make a self-driving train? Sounds a million times easier than a self-driving car.

I think we should just keep invading Iraq until we get it right.

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Random Thoughts: Black Widow, Britain, and Semicolons

Monday, May 11, 2015 8:12 am

Not much of a feminist, but it was disturbing how much emphasis there was in the Avengers movie on Black Widow making all the men sandwiches.

Not much of a feminist, but not sure about the scene where it’s revealed it’s the Black Widow’s time of the month and she out-rages the Hulk.

Not much of a feminist, but I’m not sure about that scene in Avengers where the Black Widow is disabled by a math question.

Britain has elections? I thought they just had joust tournaments to pick a new king.

Going back to JavaScript and C#, Swift has convinced me that semicolons are annoying and unnecessary.

I mean in programming; in writing, I love semicolons!

Remember when forgetting a semicolon led to the most cryptic errors? Now IDE’s are like “You forgot a semicolon.”

But if the IDE’s know where semicolons should be, just proves they aren’t really necessary in the first place.

I think a good solution to the poll problems in the British election is to label all future polling with “For entertainment purposes only.”

My almost 2yo has started asking “Why?” when I tell him to do something. Hey, buddy, you don’t have enough a vocabulary for reasoning.

It’s like when I ask him a question and he pauses to think of the answer. How many file folders could he possibly have to search through?

He know like maybe 100 words. How inefficient would his search engine have to be to need to think about anything?

There a word yet for news sites that are “satirical” but no one ever links to them because they’re funny but only because they got duped?

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Random Thoughts: The Simpsons, Hillary, and Mocking Religion

Thursday, May 7, 2015 8:07 am

It’s safe to say humanity in general is a good thing. I mean, dog’s really like us, and how could they and their wagging tails be wrong?

Ever since he killed off Anya like that, I don’t care what bad things happen to Joss Whedon.

I might like robocalls from politicians if it sounded like an actual robot was calling me — like Soundwave from the Decepticons.

The left seem determined to root out any liberalism left in its ranks.

At this point, I’m unlikely to watch a new episode of The Simpsons until the finale, so I’m looking forward to that.

What I’m most looking forward to is my kids being old enough to watch the first ten seasons with them.

“Classic Itchy & Scratchy! …What else is on?” That was me about 20 season into The Simpsons.

You can draw Jesus all you want and no one will try to murder you. Draw Jesus today!

Is it still considered a vegan meal if you stole it from a herbivore you murdered?

Hipsters celebrate Cinco de Aioli.

I was going to make fun of everyone doing those overdone “Cinco de Mayo/Mayonnaise” jokes, but then I thought of a good one.

The great thing about Hillary Clinton as a presidential candidate is that everyone already knows not to trust her.

The more disappointed you are by the winning presidential candidate, the less you’ll be let down later.

We all agree everyone should have the freedom to mock Islam — or any other religion or belief system — and not be murdered? Right?

In the new Community eps, I’m really liking the character Frankie and how she doesn’t quite exist in the same universe as the show.

In a way, she’s like an Abed in that she sorts breaks the fourth wall, but she does it as outsider instead of insider. #Community

I guess I should read the Constitution. Is there a version illustrated with GIFs from Firefly?

I’m just waiting for the grittier, more realistic reboot of Grimace. Related: What the hell is Grimace?

As a wise man once told me: “Don’t worry what Grimace is. Just be glad he’s on our side.”

Can we at least all agree that getting worked up over a non-Muslim drawing Muhammad is really stupid?

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Random Thoughts: Avengers, Boxing, and Monarch Babies

Monday, May 4, 2015 8:34 am

I’m actually a bit surprised about how many people have been willing to listen to ten and a half hours of my writing.

Are Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders running for president of the United State or of Del Boca Vista?

Most gun ranges don’t let you practice firing 2 pistols while diving through the air because of “safety.” We are becoming culture of sissies.

The new Avengers movie doesn’t appeal to me. I don’t care how old Ultron is.

Gah! First negative review for Superego on Amazon. At least he implies I appeal to today’s youths.

I have to say, I’ve internalized the narrative enough that the photos of the indicted officers was a bit of a surprise.

Instead of learning not to be racist, it’s like we’re instead learning new ways to be racist.

We’re all expecting to be extremely disappointed by every DC movie being worked on, right?

Everyone is tired with the crap coming out of Washington DC. But they’re excited for what’s coming from Washington Marvel.

I wonder if in season 2 of Daredevil if they’ll do storyline where Matt Murdock can’t afford rent in the city and becomes the Jersey Devil.

So I hear there is a big boxing match tonight, or as its known in other countries, an American punch battle.

I love cheering on a boxing match.
“Punch some more!”
“Even more punching!”
“Refs not looking – kick!”

Who cares who the fastest horse is? I bet I could still easily beat it in a race with my Hyundai.

The president has greeted the new royal baby with a formally issued death threat. Just an old American tradition with English monarchs.

I was supposed to somersault across the swamp? Spent hours trying to figure 1st level of The Last Ninja. That knowledge is 25 years too late.

New Joker is a great idea. Just tattoo characters with everything we need to know about them. Characterization eats up valuable screen time.

Defense of free speech is a microaggression.

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Random Thoughts: Rule of Law, State and Religion, and Fission

Thursday, April 30, 2015 8:24 am

For ending to Superego, some reviews have called it too abrupt while others point it out as one of the best parts.

Endings are hard. I can think of few things in fiction where I loved the ending. Mainly successful twist endings.

For movies, I think the best ending I’ve seen is for The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. Perfect resolution for the three characters.

If some are able to injure and kill others without punishment, you don’t have the rule of law and that is not a happy place to be.

A little more rioting, and I’m sure we can sort this out to the benefit of all.

It’s really hard to take seriously any criticism of capitalism that’s instantly shared worldwide through the internet.

When we’re talking about abuse of government power, I think a guilty until proven innocent standard is best.

Where did the whole idea that marriage should involve a man and a woman come from anyway?

I’m just a bit skeptical the Founding Fathers hid gay marriage in the Constitution and we just didn’t find it until now.

You could remove marriage from government for being a religious institution, but redefining it is silly and shortsighted.

Of course, redefining marriage started with changes in divorce law. Lesson: Keep your church and state separate.

When the definition of marriage is up to the state, social engineering is inevitable. The point should be to avoid that.

The blind lawyer Batman show made me realize how good a regular Batman show could potentially be.

One with adult Batman. Not baby Batman like the show currently on FOX.

People, stop crashing on the highway. It really inconveniences me.

Was thinking it’s inevitable next president will inherit a growing economy because it has to rally some time, but starting to wonder.

Eh, we should stumble into some growth soon. At least for some states. Like Texas.

We’re possibly approaching a society where it’s considered worse to hurt someone’s feelings than to shoot him.

So what’s the PC term for people who gleefully commit random acts of destruction and violence?

Still baffled how Ben Affleck failed upward from Daredevil to Batman.

One of the secrets to good health is to use microaggressions to intimidate viruses and bacteria.

I once met a police officer and he seemed nice, so I don’t get what the problem is.

What did people do with opinions before the internet?

Gah! I just found out I referred to stars doing fission in Superego! How did no one catch that until now?

Well, it came up in a Rico monologue, so I guess we can say he made the mistake and not me.

Or I just have to live with the mistake and say he lives in some alternate universe where stars work by fission. I’ll expand that in sequel.

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Random Thoughts: Star Wars and Hillary

Monday, April 27, 2015 7:52 am

I have a special ring which shows I’m a member of the patriarchy. Or maybe it’s just my wedding ring.

The Republican who can beat Hillary is whichever one can successfully summon a Patronus.

Why are we acting like it’s bad Harry Reid was beaten up by the mob. Would we rather he was good friends with the mob?

How many more decades of this until we admit the War on Stars has failed?

His hair isn’t gray because Wookies live for centuries, people! How do you not know this? What do they teach in schools?

Is my novel better than Star Wars? Well, it’s at least better than the Star Wars novelizations. Of which I only read The Phantom Menace.

With these Star Wars sequels, will we finally get the answer about what ultimately happened to Jar Jar Binks?

Actually, I am legitimately curious in what happened to Naboo after everything. Maybe they used it for beta testing the Death Star.

“They elect teenage girls as queens? That’s stupid. Warm up the Death Star lasers.”

You think midichlorians are going to get mentioned in the new Star Wars movies, or are we all on board with pretending that never happened?

“The Force is strong in my family. My father has it. I have it. My sister has it. Anyone who bought midichorlian supplements at GNC has it.”

“I’m the good guy, Anakin. I’m the one who cares and can help save your wife. Now force choke this puppy to prove your loyalty.”

Great, all this new Star Wars trailer is doing is reminding me how awful the prequels were.

Having watched the leaked trailer, I was surprised to find myself instantly siding with Ben Affleck Batman over that stuck up Superman.

We need some government PSAs about not taking video in portrait mode.

I’ll never forget where I was when Kennedy was shot: In the grassy knoll framing Lee Harvey Oswald.

The two things people despise the most these days are racism and white people.

Smart, self-driving vehicles used to be the most common mode of transportation, but people got tired of stepping in horse poop.

Wow. Five 12 hour days of shooting was pretty tiring. Can’t imagine what it’s like doing a feature. Well, one day…

My 4yo daughter had her first tee-ball game today. I lost count of the unforced errors.

Billy Joel is right: We didn’t start the fire. Other people did all that stuff in his song. This is all their fault.

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Random Thoughts: Hillary, Earnings, and Daredevil

Wednesday, April 15, 2015 7:59 am

Problem with Hillary is she’s just not very personable. Only time she shows genuine emotion is when threatening to swallow people’s souls.

“Do you want guac on that?”
“Let me ask my consultants.”
“Guac costs extra. Could make you look elitist.”

I am not going to rest until all of you read Superego. Because I am concerned for your happiness.

“Look at Hillary order from Chipotle! She thinks she’s people!”

“Hi. I’m Hillary, and I am just like you, single young females. You know as they say: You are what you soak in the blood of.”

Women, who tend to not work as many years in the workforce as men, earn less than men. Did anyone ask if they wanted to work more?

If you interpret the 78% statistic as women earning less for the same work, the reason you earn less is because you’re a gullible idiot.

So does Chef Gordon Ramsay ever make an appearance on Daredevil?

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Random Thoughts: Ready for Hillary!

Monday, April 13, 2015 9:26 am

I can get Amazon PrimeNow at my office. I wield power that even the greatest kings never had.

What boots did Nancy Sinatra have before she got ones made for walking? Rocket boots made for flying? Much more interesting to sing about.

Hillary Clinton is going to run for president again? Cool. Last time, a charismatic empty suit dashed her dreams, but she’s not deterred.

Hillary is pretty old, but I’d kinda prefer a president who would just sleep most of the day. 2nd best thing to another Coolidge.

I’m a little afraid that if Hillary fell down and couldn’t get up, she might mistake the nuclear football for her medical alert bracelet.

Republicans act a little too scared of Hillary. How bad can someone be who has a whole house made out of candy in the middle of the woods?

“My emojis aren’t tolerant enough.” Man, I’m hoping we’ve finally reached peak asininity.

So is the idea that in 2008 we just weren’t ready for Hillary? We did not complete the requisite Hillary prep?

“In 2008, there was still some hope left. But now… we’re ready for Hillary!”

One thing I’ll say about the new Daredevil show: That’s the tiniest font for opening credits I’ve ever seen.

No way anyone would try font that small in a pre-HD era. #Daredevil

“I can’t win this without your support.” -Hillary Clinton to her walker

You don’t have a soul if you don’t feel at least a little sympathy for the people pretending to be excited by a Hillary candidacy.

Maybe Hansel and Gretel tricked her into her oven. #WhyHillarysAnnouncementIsLate

“Hello. 40 years ago I was married to an extremely lecherous president when the economy was good. Please elect me president, too.”

Democrats rejected her 8 years ago as not exciting enough, but now that’s she even older and less relevant… there are no better choices.

This is going to be boring presidential campaign. I already wore myself out on making fun of Hillary 20 years ago.

If we get the right rich person to push people around with the right laws, everything will be good.

So when will get to the point that Democrat presidential candidates can stop pretending to be Christian?

The big question for 2016 will be how much as a country have we just plain given up.

This is a bit like if the GOP went for younger, more interesting candidate than Dole in 1996 then acted all excited for him 8 years later.

Then again, the young people who didn’t want Hillary in 2008 are now 7 years older and had the hope beaten out of them. #ReadyForHillary

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Random Thoughts: Wasserman, Audible, and Duck Tales

Friday, April 10, 2015 9:56 am

Back in my day, we retweeted everything by hand.

Debbie Wasserman-Schultz: “Whatever should be allowed for abortion should be between a woman and Doctor Gosnell.”

I believe in execution in some cases. Like the Joker. Really stupid they haven’t executed the Joker. He’s going to escape and kill again.

If I ever mansplain something to you, you thank me.

Best book I have read this year.” Really nice review of Audible version of Superego.

Sorta wish I could have done Audible version of Superego myself. Would love to have read for Rico. Not so much for Diane.

Overall, better to let a professional do it who knows how to keep all character voices distinct.

The humor in Superego seems to be a big selling point, but I never thought to mention that. It was supposed to be my first serious book.

The next novel I’m finishing up I think is funnier than Superego, but still not quite what I’d call a comedy.

I’ve had the Duck Tales theme song stuck in my head for three days now. Not sure I’m complaining.

My little sister was costume designer for new original series on Hulu Resident Advisors.

My sister is coming down to Austin to work on a project with Emergent Order. Will be my first time to work with her professionally.

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Random Thoughts: Rand, Roads, and Punishment

Wednesday, April 8, 2015 8:31 am

I think the best way Ron Paul could help Rand Paul in the Republican primary would be to denounce him.

“Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t need roads.” -Doc Brown advocating a libertarian future

If your bill gets struck down by a unanimous Supreme Court decision, you should be imprisoned for trying to subvert the Constitution.

We need to be constantly thinking of more ways to punish and imprison our legislators. That’s just common sense.

I’ll vote for whichever Republican candidate causes the most irrational freak outs.

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Random Thoughts: Reviews, Religious View, and Force

Tuesday, April 7, 2015 8:20 am

Getting nostalgic for when the left attacked marriage as an outdated institution instead of holding it up as the most important right ever.

While we have the image in our heads of large, lumbering dinosaurs, most weren’t very large at all. The majority were microscopic.

Been following reviews for my novel Superego on a number of different sites. It’s done best on Amazon – 4.7.

Amazon has some rating selection bias since you have to write a review to rate, so I think people who love or hate it most motivated.

Superego has done well on Goodreads. Not as familiar with the site, but don’t have to write review to rate.

The most ratings for Superego are on Also, the only two negative ratings.

Actually, I consider 3-stars a negative rating. That’s two whole stars of not liking it.

Anyway, on Audible, you have to own the book under Audible to rate it, but you don’t have to write a review.

I wouldn’t blame the narrator. I think he did a great job and got the tone right (and has been rated high in the reviews).

The only one star review (on Audible) wrote a review, and it’s pretty easy to dismiss him as crazy.

This is all very interesting. I’m used to instant feedback, but a novel is years to getting back what people think about it.

I’m really happy any read or enjoyed it at all, and I’m looking forward to getting out my next novel which I’m finishing up now.

Oh, and for everyone who’s enjoyed Superego so far, I’m working on a cool new project for it…

And a sequel to Superego is planned. Just need to finish up a couple other books first.

Once I got past the Yahoo Screen streaming issues, I’ve been absolutely loving the new episodes of Community.

Community has taken such a beating through the years (cast changes, losing show runner, cancellation), yet it still keeps finding its center.

We’re not taking religion out of marriage. We’re asking government to enforce one religious view over another.

If you believe in any parameters about marriage, you have a religious view on marriage. Non-religious view is “what the hell is marriage?”

That’s why current path we’re on is absolute nonsense (especially from libertarian perspective) and a recipe for continued conflict.

It’s like asking the government decide what constitutes a proper baptism and requiring others to participate.

Worth repeating: if you support the idea of the government defining what a marriage is, you’re a bad libertarian.

Bad, libertarian. Bad. *rolls up Constitution and hits libertarian on the nose*

Who wants a science fiction award given in honor of Hugo Chavez?

The SJWs attract all the craven people these days because you get to blame your lack of compassion on others.

“Love is love” is a really inane argument about marriage. For one, you should love lots of people, but you don’t marry them all.

And to say marriage should have anything to do with love is taking a religious view about it, and if the floor is open to religious views…

Another thing that should be obvious: If you’re not for plural marriages, then you place some value on the Christian view on marriage.

I’m usually libertarian, but I think you should have to submit a form proving extreme need before making a movie longer than 90 minutes.

The movie Lucy had too much gobbledygook for me. Was action movie with a 2001: A Space Odyssey ending.

I can put up with bad science and flighty philosophy if there was more tension and cool action sequences. #Lucy

Had pictures of me taking from various angles while making different expressions. Been a lot of new experiences this year.

Everyone should be reading Superego right now. What else could you be doing that is possibly more important?

Does Sally Kohn think a cigarette tax is government force? Because I’m pretty sure a guy got strangled over that.

If we had to hold a gun to someone’s head every time we wanted to force someone to do something, our arms would get tired. So we made laws.

Even more insistent than a personal trainer is a little kid yelling, “Do it again!”

Better Call Saul season finale was weird. Like almost Buffy season 4 finale weird. Definitely on board for next season, though.

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Random Thoughts: Freedom of Religion, Bullying, and Hypotheticals

Friday, April 3, 2015 8:40 am

Freedom of religion more fundamental than free speech. Little point to free speech if not free to have different beliefs to speak about.

Our civil rights are determined by whoever is best at bullying.

Are we all done caring about the host of The Daily Show yet?

Boy, I hope Iran doesn’t nuke any country I’ve heard of.

I’m thinking there’s ways to get everyone cake with no one being forced against their beliefs, but I dare say I’m missing the point.

Point of Order: They now say there are a number of different genders out there, but is it bigoted if I’m only attracted to one?

I kinda feel for Trevor Noah. If I ever had any unfunny tweets, I wouldn’t want people to focus on them.

I know when I’m intellectually secure in my position, I do everything I can to shut down the possibility of debate.

I’m still fascinated by the fact that all the Better Call Saul episode titles end in ‘o’ except one. What does it mean?!

I guess we’ve advanced so much as a country that most of the discrimination we’re now fighting is only theoretical.

Christians have strongly held religious views on marriage. They have them now. They’ll have them a thousand years from now. Cope with it.

When Jesus pointed to Adam and Eve (one man, one woman) as God’s model for marriage, was he being hateful? Would we put up with that now?

So what’s next? “We found a plumber who if he hypothetically sold pizza said he would hypothetically not cater a gay wedding.”

“Kill! Crush! Destroy!” -robot AI gone bad; also, current civil right movement

It’s too bad Sylvester is known primarily for his attempted violence against Tweety Bird and not his tireless efforts to end the suffering of succotash.

“With this kinda sorta agreement with Iran, I have saved the world. I’m basically Superman.” -President Obama

“Oh, I love your shoes! Oh, mommy, they’re so pretty. When you die and I’m a grown-up, can I please wear them?” -my 4yo to her mother

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Random Thoughts: Ted Kennedy, Religious Freedom, and The Daily Show

Tuesday, March 31, 2015 8:05 am

For good satire, you need to get to the heart of the issue. I just can’t fathom thinking so lightly on a topic to get the Borowitz take.

I don’t like attacking someone else attempting to do humor — as we all fail — but he’s like a parody of intellectual laziness.

Maybe it’s like an Andy Kaufman routine, though, and he’s more brilliant than us all.

If you ever don’t like a tweet of mine, please note that it’s possible that at some point in time I was hacked.

We need to stop Christians from forcing their beliefs on us about how we shouldn’t be forcing beliefs on them.

If you’re a Dem who can’t admit Ted Kennedy was an awful person, then it’s hypocritical to attack a Republican for absolutely anything.

Left don’t have a live and let live attitude. They feel there are people out there with wrong viewpoints, and they want gov to punish them.

“If you destroy religious freedom, we’ll all get cake.” #TheCakeIsALie

Once there was a civil rights movement that wasn’t primarily dishonest posturing. I read about it in a history book.

I hadn’t paid attention to The Daily Show since Craig Kilborne left. What’s going on?

Don’t get the problem. Does host of The Daily Show need to be bright or does he need to be able to read a teleprompter and make funny faces?

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Random Thoughts: Harry Reid, John Wick, and Oppression

Monday, March 30, 2015 7:43 am

The main foe of abortion having greater acceptance are the people who fall in love with their children after the 10 week ultrasound.

I’m like super-confused now. Is it feminist or anti-feminist to portray women as delicate little flowers?

“Women should be in combat! But no clapping… that could scare them.”

I am busy on the final edits for my next novel. It will be a bit more light-hearted than Superego, though still not quite a comedy.

Remember: There’s an Audible version of Superego. Could listen for free with 30 day trial.

I assume I still get royalties even if you get it for free. I should probably look into that.

I’m really excited about how many people have enjoyed my first novel. Have other exciting stuff in the works I hope I can announce soon.

Maybe a way to market flu shots to college kids is to say they prevent viruses from committing microaggressions.

There isn’t someone reading this right now who hasn’t purchased a copy of Superego, right? That would make no sense whatsoever.

You have to admire the time Harry Reid argued that taxes are voluntary. It was very creative. He will be missed in the Senate.

My goal for the 2016 presidential election is to be as engaged as I was for the 1984 one (when I was five and only vaguely aware of it).

I think the reasonable thing to do would be to put Hillary Clinton in prison until she un-deletes her emails.

Finally watched John Wick. Pretty cool movie. Glad there’s going to be a sequel.

Only complaint: really indistinct dragon character. “Oh, that’s not Thug #3; that’s the guy who’s bested John Wick twice already.”

From John Wick, I’ve decided I’m going to practice the Center Axis Relock gun stance in case I need to kill a dozen people in close confines.

Liam Neeson from Taken is pretty much the standard for fathers these days, right?

When you’re asking the government to force someone to do something, you’ve become an oppressor. It doesn’t matter what your background is.

It’s quite fashionable to hatefully rail against perceived hate, but angry people filled righteousness never led to anything bad.

I find laws against bulletproof vests pretty funny. “The police need to be able to shoot you… for your own protection.”

So the guy who was Jacob in Lost also plays Lucifer in Supernatural season 5. That’s some weird type-casting.

Disney owns the muppets, too? If Disney ever decides to go evil, they can basically hold everything from our childhoods hostage.

I’m old enough to remember when the American left was liberal. Well, old enough to have read about it.

Science and religion are two separate things, and absolutely everyone practices both.

To support late term abortion but not infanticide makes no moral sense, as Gosnell obviously realized.

It’s a little bit disturbing how many people think the most pressing issue of the day is it’s too hard to kill tiny humans.

Why would anyone join Scientology anymore? Does anyone join a religion these days without first googling it?

The state will either protect religious freedom or end up imposing a religion. One or the other.

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Random Thoughts: President, Cruz, and Mickey

Wednesday, March 25, 2015 8:22 am

If you don’t have friends, make some just so you can talk about Superego. It will be worth the annoyance of friends.

Just a reminder that I am now old enough to be president. I promise to do nothing other than cash my check each week if elected.

Or does the president get paid biweekly? Or twice a month? Anyone know how that works?

And would it be possible to not have to move to D.C. if elected president? That place is full of weirdos and sociopaths.

Future headline to keep in mind if Ted Cruz takes charge in implementing his policies: “Cruz Control.” Lemme explain…

The Conservative Book Club doesn’t exactly have a large selection under “Fiction,” but it makes up for it in quality.

When watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, I can’t get over what an egomaniac Mickey is. Everything has to be named after or shaped like him.

For a while, he even tried to call the Hot Dog Dance the “Mousekadance.” Come on, dude.

The less you like the Republican candidate in the primary, the less you’ll be disappointed by him later.

Hey, maybe in another decade FOX will revive Firefly for a couple episodes.

3-star reviews hurt. That’s two whole stars of not liking it. And stars are some of the largest objects in the universe.

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Random Thoughts: Lynch and Starbucks

Monday, March 23, 2015 8:26 am

“Loretta Lynch: She’ll help you in a pinch!” -slogan for if she wants to compete against Saul Goodman

Let’s look at these questions. Where do I most often interact with someone of another race? Well, it’s not at Starbucks.

If you spent all day at Starbucks, you’d probably be really curious about minorities too.

I’m mainly watching The Last Man on Earth out of curiosity of where in the world the story will go.

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Random Thoughts: Starbucks, Community, and Voting

Friday, March 20, 2015 8:12 am

So have all the white hipsters at Starbucks solved race yet?

Paying people to dig ditches and other people to fill in those ditches still sounds more useful than ethanol subsidies.

Come on, guys; if you’re going to pay millions to revive a TV series, make sure your video delivery system is ready. #Community

And now I really want to see Portuguese Gremlins. #Community

And I really like the weirdness of new-Shirley’s non-weirdness. #Community

My view on voting is that it should take little effort to vote, but it should take some effort. Disenfranchise the extremely lazy.

Wait… the president of which country suggested voting should be mandatory?

It’s becoming the mantra of the left that if anything is worth doing, it’s worth doing at gunpoint.

In my dream world, voting wouldn’t matter. Because no matter who was elected, my rights wouldn’t be on the chopping block.

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