ESPN pulled the standard Hank Williams, Jr. opening from Monday Night Football after some comments the singer made on Fox and Friends:

In an interview Monday morning on Fox News’ “Fox & Friends,” Williams, unprompted, said of Obama’s outing on the links with House Speaker John Boehner: “It’d be like Hitler playing golf with (Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin) Netanyahu.”

I, for one, applaude the decision by ESPN.

Comparing the Speaker of the House, John Boehner, to Adolf Hitler was a horrible thing for Williams to do.

Then, comparing Obama to Benjamin Netanyahu? Our Israeli friend deserves better.

Whatcha watchin’?

Cartoons.

Why aren’t you watching the news?

This is more real.

I like the news.

…
(more…)

Have you seen Obama’s new proposal? Remember that bill he wanted Congress to pass that night he gave the speech. It seems they finally got around to writing it. It calls for “$1.5 trillion in new tax revenue” plus another $1.5 trillion in spending cuts over 10 years.

What cuts?

Well, it cuts $250 billion from Medicare over 10 years. How much did Paul Ryan’s plan — the one where the Democrats showed grandma being thrown off a cliff — cut in the next 10 years? Zero. I guess Obama doesn’t want to wait until 2022 to toss grandma off a cliff. He threw his under the bus, so why not toss yours over a cliff, right?

Oh, yes, there are other savings, too. $330 billion from cuts to Medicaid and farm subsidies, according to the reports.

So, that’s 1/2 trillion dollars. Where does the other $1 trillion come from? The military. Specifically, it would be from money not spent on troops in Iraq and Afghanistan.

So, does that mean that if Congress doesn’t pass the bill, he’s going to leave the troops over there? Is Obama kidnapping our military and holding them for ransom?

Because if the troops were coming home anyway, the money saved from bringing them back wouldn’t count as part of the proposal, right?

Here’s how his math works.

Raise taxes $1.5 trillion. Cut Medicare, Medicaid, and farm subsidies a third of that. That equals $3 trillion in savings.

Yeah, I can’t get the numbers to add up either. Or figure out how raising taxes is savings.

Must be another example of where reality is to be ignored in order to follow Dear Leader’s plan. There seems to be a lot of that.

According to AFP (Agence France-Presse, which is French or something for The Daily Planet, I think), Obama’s approval rating is at 75%.

In Europe.

… he remains highly popular in Europe, with 75 percent in 12 EU nations approving his handling of global affairs, a poll said Wednesday.

He is also much better liked than his predecessor George W. Bush, whose rating in Europe was just 20 percent in 2008, said the Transatlantic Trends poll by the German Marshall Fund.

Here’s what I think: if Europe like Barack Obama so much, they can have him.

But, we really should get something for him. I mean, he did kind of screw things up really bad here, so anything we can get would help offset the damage.

In baseball or pro football, trades happen all the time. In baseball, you hear about one player traded for another, or for a couple of minor leaguers. In pro football, some running back for a couple of draft choices happen from time to time. So why not in the oldest sport and second-oldest profession, politics?

Let’s trade Obama to Europe. But who should we get in return?

I’m thinking Nicolas Sarkozy would be an improvement. With that trade, we’d get a hot First Lady, too!

Heck, the desiccated corpse of Charles de Gaulle would be an improvement over Obama.

How about the Queen of England? Sure, all she does is ride around waving funny at people, but right now, that sounds pretty good.

Or the Pope. He doesn’t hate the Jews nearly as much as Obama does.

Maybe we could get Roman Polanski. Of course, he’d go straight to jail, but then we’d have a child rapist in jail and Obama in Europe. Win-win.

Or, perhaps instead of somebody from Europe, we could get a landmark or something. Like Stonehenge. Or the Rock of Gibraltar. Or Notre Dame de Paris. Or a pair of wooden shoes from the Netherlands. Any of these things would be an improvement over Obama.

So, what do you think? What would you like to get from Europe in exchange for Obama?

The Ministry of Truth Obama Administration has launched AttackWatch.com which will let you report people saying mean things about Big Brother the president.

[Direct link]

You can help. Go to AttackWatch.com and file a report.

Or, if you want, you can list things here. I’ll start.

• I saw on the news that unemployment is up. I want to report the news.
• I was going to report the Communist Party, but they support Obama’s tax hikes. So never mind about them.
• There was a dog in the neighborhood that was barking. It sounded like a mean bark. So he had to be a Teabaggerz dog. I want to report him.
• I started a movie on Netflix the other night when the president was on TV speaking, and the movie played instead of showing Obama. I want to report Netflix.

I’m sure there are plenty of other things you’ve seen that should be reported.

With all the talk (and it’s mostly talk) about Obama’s Job Bill, it seems we’re forgetting about the current jobs program that’s underway: the TSA.

While the Transportation Security Administration was created under a law signed by President George W. Bush, it has really taken off with Obama’s flunkies in charge.

I won’t go into great detail why the TSA was a bad idea to begin — does anyone really think anyone could have hijacked a planeload of Americans after 9/11? — I will say that if it’s possible to make a bad idea worse, a Democrat can do it. And a liberal Democrat can up the ante. And when you get moonbat crazy Democrats like Obama, Holder, and Napolitano overseeing things, you’re going to find out what government overreach really is.

And they’re reaching for your crotch. And boobies. And your kids.

Well, now, the TSA has decided it won’t fondle your children. Not as much, anyway:

Children 12 years old and younger soon will no longer be required to remove their shoes at airport security checkpoints, Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano told Congress on Tuesday. The policy also includes other ways to screen young children without resorting to a pat-down that involves touching private areas on the body.

Those heading into puberty are still up for groping.

What this means is the TSA won’t be the prefect job for child molesters.

We’re going to have to wait until they pass the Obama Jobs Bill to see what new opportunity child molesters will have.

The president gave his big speech last night. And in it, he laid out a plan.

[Direct link]

It all makes sense to me now. I love it when Obama be speechifying.

What can we do for you, Mr. President?

Poll numbers are down, unemployment’s up, and it looks like I’m going to have to go back to Chicago after next year.

You need to give a speech!

Speech! Give a speech!

Hey, that’s a great idea! I haven’t given a speech in — gosh — it seems like days.

(more…)

Sometimes, the things people do are so obviously nuts, even my cat recognizes it.

[Direct link]

Transcript:

I just don’t understand some people. Last week, actor George Clooney took the time during a news conference about his new movie to say some nice things about Barack Obama.

George Clooney: There’s a guy in office right now who is smarter than almost anybody you know, who has more compassion than almost anybody you know, and he’s having an almost impossible time governing.

That’s not the first time we’ve heard someone from the entertainment industry say nice things about Obama. Like how smart he is.

Joy Behar: But I think you have a point. He’s a little too smart for the country in a certain way…

You know what all that reminds me of?

CPL Allen Melvin: Raymond Shaw is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.

In the movie “The Manchurian Candidate,” those that were singing the praises of Raymond Shaw were brainwashed by communists.

That’s not the case with Hollywood. Those singing the praises of Barack Obama? They’re brainwashing themselves.

I just don’t understand some people.

I think my cat has a point.

Hey, did you hear the news? Obama has a jobs plan! And he’s going to actually appear on the TV set to tell us all about it?

Oh, you already heard? Then, you’re as excited as I am about it, aren’t you? Yeah, I thought so.

*Yawn*

Here’s the thing, though. Have you noticed what’s been happening to Obama as he tries to schedule things?

First, Obama absolutely has to tell us all about this awesome plan he has. But not today. Next week. When the Republicans are scheduled to debate. On NBC.

(By the way, don’t NBC and Obama talk any more? Maybe when Obama gets up in the morning, he doesn’t wake NBC. Then, he’s off to the golf course before NBC even gets out of bed.)

Anyway, Obama wanted to give this oh-so-important speech on Wednesday, September 7, the same night as the GOP debate. Then Claire Shipman’s husband came out and said, “The Republicans can move their debate. It’ll be okay with us.”

And NBC was, like, “awkward!” Then John Boehner (he’s the Speaker of the House or something) was all, like, “No, I’m doing my hair that night, so do it another night.”

So then Obama said he’d do it the next night. But then someone realized that the NFL was playing that night. (On a Thursday night? I thought that was reserved for 2nd-tier college football teams.)

Then Obama was all, “Oh, football? I forgot about that. We didn’t have that in Kenya when I was a boy.”

So, now, it’s still Thursday night, but at 7:00 PM.

Which means that the east coast gets to hear Obama speak, but the left coast will be at work (those that work, anyway) and not able to hear him.

What does all this mean?

It means that we’ve now discovered we can treat Obama like the pretty girls treat the nice-but-don’t-want-to-date-him guy from school.

Make an excuse for a date, and he’ll merrily go along.

“Hey, America? I was wondering if maybe you’d like to go out for a hamburger after study?”

“Oh, Barack, that’s so sweet of you to ask. But I’m doing my hair. Some other time, huh?”

“Okay then, America. How about the next night? We could head over to the Bijou and catch that new movie I heard you talking about?”

“Oh, Barack, that’s so sweet of you to ask. But I’m getting new wallpaper for my room, and I need to make sure everything is just right. You understand?”

“Sure I do, America. What about an early dinner then. Something quick, maybe?”

“Oh, Barack, that’s so sweet of you to ask. But I’ve got cheerleader practice, and just won’t have the time.”

You see? We could do that. We just need to line up excuses. Then, when Obama wants to do something, like give a speech or raise our taxes or push some gargantuan health care bill down out throat, we can offer up an excuse and he’ll put it off till some later time. We keep that up until January, 2013, and the problem takes care of itself.

Now, we just need some excuses.

Any ideas?