Star Trek seems to have gotten one right. For those not familiar with the TV franchise, there’s a plot device they used in called Hodgkin’s Law of Parallel Planetary Development. There’s some mumbo-jumbo about “similar planets with similar environments and similar populations tended to gravitate toward similar biological developments over time.” What it really meant was that they could save money by having planets look like Earth at many points in history, allowing the show to use existing sets and costumes.
But, maybe, just maybe, there is something to Hodgkin’s Law. On March 15, 1967, the 25th episode of the show’s second season (production episode 43) aired.
Here’s the setup. The Enterprise happens across a planet similar to earth (the fourth planet of system FGC 892) with Hodgkin’s Law in full effect. On this planet, the Roman Empire didn’t fall in its 503rd year (476 A.D. by our calendar). It survived another 1,500 years or so, to Start Date 4040.7 when the Enterprise happened across it.
Rome is in what we would call the 20th century, and Kirk, Spock, and McCoy get captured when investigating. They’re thrown into jail with an ex-gladiator named Flavius. And that’s where our video picks up.
FLAVIUS: Long ago there were rebellings, but they were suppressed. And, with each century, the slaves acquired more rights under the law. They received rights to medicine, the right to government payments in their old age, and they slowly learned to be content.
SPOCK: Even more fascinating. Slavery involving into an institution, with guaranteed medical payments, old age pension.
For the last couple of months, I’ve spent time locked in a satellite, being forced to watch bad movies with a couple of wise-cracking robots.
Wait. Maybe that wasn’t me, but someone else. I think I may have seen that on TV or something.
Yeah, that’s what it was.
I used to enjoy watching Mystery Science Theater 3000. Still do, in fact. I have all of the episodes on disc or recorded.
If you remember the show, you’ll recall that there was a character, TV’s Frank, played by Frank Conniff, that joined the cast at the start of Season Two and left at the end of Season Six. I liked the character. A lot. He was funny, and Frank Conniff made him really likable.
What’s Frank Conniff up to now? He’s still a comedian, and besides doing stand-up and participating in Cinematic Titanic shows, is doing commentary for Salon.com. Yes, it’s political. And yes, Frank is a liberal. Frank Conniff, I mean. Here’s his first Salon commentary.
Now, if you’re a fan of MST3K, as Frank J., Harvey, and I are, I’m curious as to what you think of Frank Conniff’s commentary. Lots of Satellite News readers agree with his politics, but a good number don’t.
I had a brief back-and-forth with one of the commenters there. He ended up linking to IMAO as evidence that I’m political or something. I thanked him for the link.
Anyway, what about you? Was it funny, regardless of political bent? How about the forum, an MST3K fan site? Is that the place for political commentary? And what about entertainers who go political? Does it ruin your appreciation of their past work?
What do you think about Frank Conniff’s commentary?
UPDATE: Linked by Frank Conniff. I think he thinks we think he sucks. I don’t think he sucks. I think his politics suck, but that’s true of most entertainers.
Everybody is talking taxes. Okay, not everybody. But some of the major Republican candidates are.
Herman Cain has a plan … two actually … to remake the tax code. One is his 999 plan. If you keep reading about 999, though, you’ll see that the long-term plan is to convert to what some call the Fair Tax. 999 involves income, corporate, and sales tax. The Fair Tax is simply a national sales tax.
Changing the tax code won’t do any good if the government keeps spending. They want to talk income, when the problem is outgo.
“Captain Smith, the lookout has spotted an ice berg dead ahead!”
“Very good, Mister Murdoch. Have the deck chairs rearranged immediately!”
“Aye, aye, sir.”
If we don’t cut spending, then 999 will become 20-20-20, then 30-30-30, then 50-50-50, and so on. Or, Perry’s flat tax won’t be 20%. It’ll be 40%. Then 60% And so on.
We’ve got to cut spending. But that’s hard. We can’t handle hard. Never have been able to.
Oh. Well, maybe we were able to do hard things. Maybe we still are. If we only decided to.
But if the whiney tittie babies that are occupying Wall Street, or sitting in the cabinet, or sitting in the Oval Office were around earlier in our nation’s history, things would be different. And not good different.
“Go to the moon? Imperialist! I’ll make a movie about it. Now give me a sandwich. Extra mayo.” — An nameless Hollywood filmmaker.
“You’ve brought us into this war under false pretenses. Germany didn’t attack us. Japan did! And that’s because of our support for Jews! We need to bring our troops home now!” — An unnamed Texas Congressman.
“That’s just like an evil Republican president. Next he’ll be using troops to seize property from people. What? He suspended habias corpus? Somebody needs to take Lincoln out.” — An unnamed Democrat
“Look at those awful Tea Partiers! It’s not safe to visit Boston Harbor any more. I tell you, they’re going to get violent one day!” — An unnamed government worker
The whiners and complainers need to shut the hell up. And we need to make some hard choices. It will be difficult, and hurt at times. But, like exercise, that’s when you know it’s working.
But, until we quit rearranging the deck chairs, we’re going to crash head on into that ice berg. Then, folks won’t be talking about pulling the car out of the ditch; they’ll be trying to get the ship off the bottom of the ocean.
In 2008, when Flint had 265 sworn officers on their police force, there were 35 murders and 91 rapes in this city. In 2010, when Flint had only 144 police officers, the murder rate climbed to 65 and rapes–just to pick two categories–climbed to 229. In 2011, you now only have 125 shields. God only knows what the numbers will be this year for Flint if we don’t rectify it. And God only knows what that number would have been had we not been able to get a little bit of help to you.
So, if you weren’t raped or murdered this year, thank Joe Biden and Barack Obama.
If you were raped or murdered, blamed the Republicans. In fact, the Republicans are tired of rapists and murders getting all the credit. They have formed a task force to climb into your windows, snatch your people up, and rape them.
You see, I’ve been going on and on about how, no matter who the GOP nominee is, we need to support him. And some of you get your panties all in a wad about that.
“I’m not ever going to support Mitt Romney!”
“I won’t vote for Rick Perry!”
“If Sarah Palin isn’t the nominee, I’m not voting!”
“If Sarah Palin is the nominee, I’m not voting!”
“Ron Paul is nuts!”
Okay, that last one is okay. But still, nuts as he is, he’d a darn sight better than Barack Obama. But some of you are saying you won’t support this guy or that girl. Well, now Herman Cain sounds a lot like some of you people. Maybe he’s pandering to the panties-in-a-wad crowd.
I don’t care for that. I suspect Cain will backtrack, and soon. He’ll come up with some statement that sounds like some crafted statement talking about how we can disagree about important issues, but still have the same overriding goal: defeat Barack Obama and return competence to the White House.
But what should he say? Or, better, what should he have said to Wolf Blitzer’s question, “Could you support Rick Perry if he were the nominee?”
Against Obama? Of course. Hell, Wolf, I’d support you over Barack Obama.
I fully support Rick Perry for vice-president.
I would support Rick Perry if Zombie Reagan turned down the nomination.
Nine, nine, nine.
Not if he was the Democrat nominee. Has he switched back to being a Democrat?
That’s a stupid question, Wolf. What do you think I’m going to say? That I wouldn’t support Rick Perry? Do you think I’m stupid?
Recently, the president gave a speech before the Congressional Black Caucus, and, as he is wont to do, he slipped into his “Hey-I’m-Black-Too” dialect. And, the Associated Press reported the actual words he used, as he used them:
Hunter called the AP’s version “inherently racist,” sparring with New Republic contributing editor and noted linguistics expert John McWhorter, who argued the g-less version “is actually the correct one,” noting that the president’s victory in the 2008 election was due, in part, to how effortlessly “he can switch into that [black] dialect.”
…they are now charged with re-writing history to protect the speaker from himself, lest they be charged with transcribing reality, once considered the most neutral of all activities (at least in intent and aim), an activity that now carries with it the charge of “inherent racism” if the reality being transcribed belongs to blacks, and non-blacks or inauthentic blacks are doing the transcribing.
Presumably, Ms Hunter, if pressed, might have to extend the argument to audio clips that capture the dropping of the g’s — themselves a secondhand recording of reality that have not been “corrected” of their “inherent racism.”
So, now that we know that reality is racist and we must protect ourselves from it, we present the video of the president’s actual words, not as said, but as they must be to remove the charge of racism:
I just don’t understand some people. Last week, actor George Clooney took the time during a news conference about his new movie to say some nice things about Barack Obama.
George Clooney: There’s a guy in office right now who is smarter than almost anybody you know, who has more compassion than almost anybody you know, and he’s having an almost impossible time governing.
That’s not the first time we’ve heard someone from the entertainment industry say nice things about Obama. Like how smart he is.
Joy Behar: But I think you have a point. He’s a little too smart for the country in a certain way…
You know what all that reminds me of?
CPL Allen Melvin: Raymond Shaw is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.
In the movie “The Manchurian Candidate,” those that were singing the praises of Raymond Shaw were brainwashed by communists.
That’s not the case with Hollywood. Those singing the praises of Barack Obama? They’re brainwashing themselves.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: everyone who voted for Barack Obama is a dumbass. But dumbass isn’t always fatal. And it’s not always permanent.
Gene Simmons, for instance.
I’ve never considered him a dumbass. He’s a successful musician and businessman. But he did vote for Obama. And, well, you know what I’ve said about voting for Obama.
However… he’s said it more than once: he’d take back his vote for Obama:
What does this mean? Well, perhaps more and more people are coming to their senses. Maybe they now realize what we were saying back n 2008 when we said that Obama was an incompetent buffoon who’d lead the country down the road to ruin.
And maybe, just maybe, we can get them on our side, the right side, America’s side.
Normally, a toast of “To Her Majesty, the Queen” would be sufficient. But not to the World’s Smartest Human™. Oh, no. He-Who-Shall-Not-Shut-The-Hell-Up kept on rambling, over the national anthem.
Atlanta businessman Herman Cain announced his candidacy for President of the United States.
And we were there! And by we, I mean me. Frank J. is, like, a long way from Atlanta. Sarah K too. And Harvey. (Actually, I don’t know that they would have been there anyway.) But, since Atlanta isn’t all that far from me, I was there. And now, you were there, too!
Franklin Delano Roosevelt, March 4, 1933: Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy, January 20, 1961: And so my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.
Ronald Wilson Reagan, January 20, 1981: In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem; government is the problem.
Ronald Wilson Reagan, June 12, 1987: Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!
George Walker Bush, September 14, 2001: I can hear you, the rest of the world hears you, and the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon.
Barack Hussein Obama, January 19, 2011: This bit of news… under a new agreement, our national zoo will continue to dazzle children and visitors with the beloved giant pandas.
"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO."
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