I tried to close this latest poll as close to 24 hours on the dot as I could because the vote was extremely close (2 votes separate first place from last place).
The questions was: Everyone knows my solution to random ninja attacks. In 200 words or less, describe your own solution. Remember, while people hate getting randomly attacked by ninjas, they also hate high taxes, so try and keep your solutions cheap.
And the winning answer is: Answer 1, written by Jarred Nicholls of [Think About It]. It got 62 votes (34%).
Ninjas? Are you serious? Unless these “ninjas” are wearing Batman like thick-as-shit rubber tighties that reflect bullets, then whip out your Desert Eagle, put one in each of their nuts (most ninjas don’t wear anti-bullet-in-nut shields), put one in each of their knee caps, walk behind them, recite the Boondock Saints prayer, and put one in the back of their head. No more ninja.
Answer 2 was written by Pixy Misa of Ambient Irony. It got 60 votes (33%).
Hit them with a Dragon Slave spell. This is sort of like a Neutron Bomb, only backwards: it leaves people alive – more or less – in a crater several miles wide. While the Ninjas are boggling at the extent of the destruction (Ninjas often kill people, but rarely destroy entire cities), you can sneak up behind them, slip headphones over their ears and play Alanis Morisette at them until they melt into a puddle of gloop. This really works. (Celine Dion also works, but then you’d run the risk of hearing it and melting into a puddle of gloop yourself.)
Answer 3 was written by Beth of Beth’s Contradictory Brain. It got 61 votes (33%).
Easy, breed Chomps, the world’s angriest hunting dog, train his offspring what Ninja’s are and how they smell, and then say “SicEm.” Once the Ninja are taken care of (a week tops), the pups can then be trained to take out any other group, say the French, or the monkeys, causing problems.
Even though I’ve made it clear that ninjas dodge bullets, I, like a lot of people, voted for Answer 1 since it referenced the cool movie Boondock Saints. Yay, I finally voted for a winner (and my vote actually put it over the top).
Congratulations to Jarred Nicholls of [Think About It]. He will join the voodoo lounge, Modularparrot.com, Serenity’s Journal, Adventures in Trouble Shooting, and one more blog to be voted for tomorrow in the final round.
So, last group tomorrow, and then next week we will have the thrilling conclusion of the Super Lucky Happy Fun Permalink Contest Number One™.
Thanks everyone whom voted for me. I appreciate it.
Same here, I really appreciate all the votes! If I had that many readers every day I’d be thrilled!! Thanks to Frank for all his hard work on this!!
Frank, you really should look into why Question One keeps winning. There may be Gremlins in the works.
There’s no crying in baseball…..
Oh no! Pixy Misa lost Frank’s stupid blogroll contest by only two votes! I guess I didn’t vote for him enough….. Frank has slipped in the blogosphere… it couldn’t be because I stopped linking to him five or six times…
There’s no crying in baseball…..
Oh no! Pixy Misa lost Frank’s stupid blogroll contest by only two votes! I guess I didn’t vote for him enough….. Frank has slipped in the blogosphere… it couldn’t be because I stopped linking to him five or six times…
The key is to use Ninja Technology against the Ninja’s. Ninjas’ most deadly weapon is the Chinese star, which is ironic since Ninja’s arent usually Chinese, noe the less this will still work. Next Adapt a “western” attitude fighting style, which use a gun that shoots Chinese stars, pull the trigger enough and the Ninjas will crumble at the strength of you “large American Penis”