Strategies for Obama to Not Lose the House

Now even the White House is admitting that the Democrats could lose the House this November. But don’t worry; Obama has some new strategies to help the Democrats keep power this fall.

NEW STRATEGIES FOR OBAMA

* More whining.

* More blaming Bush.

* Break downing crying, saying, “Why does nobody like me?!”

* Blame more problems on that people can’t take that his middle name is “Hussein.”

* Maybe possibly consider doing something useful about the oil spill.

* Promise to put a bag over Pelosi’s head if they can keep the majority.

* Sue more states that show him up by actually doing something useful.

* Appoint the New Black Panthers as official poll security.

* Remind people that they should move forward and not backwards towards when everyone had more money.

* Continue to remind the American people how much smarter he thinks he is.

22 Comments

  1. * Remind everyone hoe his mom and Tim Geithner’s dad worked for the Ford Foundation in S.E.Asia

    * Do an Oval Office primetime telecast where he rips off his red and hyellow Obamamania t-shirt and screams “What ya gonn do when the O-man runs wild over you!”

    * In the same broadcast remind Americans that they need to give more of thier jobs to Mexicans, Pakistanis, and Indians as a sign of believing in him.

    * Plug the oil spill with his ego.

  2. He could:
    1.change parties to republican
    2. screw up even worse
    3. change parties back after the election

    I know what you are thinking, “How could he possible pull off pretending to be a republican?”. It wouldn’t be that much different for him, he has had all that experience pretending to be a democrat.

  3. Make another shady, illegal, under the table deal with an organized crime figure to obtain a way below rate and refinance…

    Huh? Ohhhh. The House of Representatives! I thought you meant his place in Chicago.

  4. Go shopping at Cabela’s in Hamburg, Pennsylvania. Walk around all sections, pay close attention to guns and fishing supplies. “I love guns. Yes, indeed. Look at all of those beautiful guns. I love it when they make the bang bang sound. Look at all of those beautiful guns. Yes, indeed.”

  5. More stuffing the ballot boxes with people who voted for freaken.

    More ignoring the constitution and declaring the electin null and a victory for demoncraps.

    More telling the U.S. to vote the way he wants or he will send michell to live with them.

    More picture of pelousy next to republican names.

  6. “In short, liberalism is never morally wrong, and so when liberals are morally flawed, it’s because they’re really conservatives!”
    – Jonah Goldberg, Liberal Fascism

    (Liberal) History will show that Obama was the worst ‘conservative’ president in history.
    So it’ll be a conservative that lost the house – problem solved.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.