Hostess was Michelle Obama’s Osama bin Laden.
— Steven Amiri (@StevenAmiri) November 16, 2012
Whenever a stranger asks our baby’s name,I always say he hasn’t told us yet.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) November 16, 2012
If the rule is minority/female officials are immune from criticism because of their race/gender then we can’t have minority/female officials
— DrewM (@DrewMTips) November 16, 2012
Leftists hate greed, which is why they want all your money.
— Jim Treacher (@jtLOL) November 16, 2012
Between S.E. Cupp, Krystal Ball and Touré,MSNBC is your #1 news source for people whose names sound like they were made up on the spot.
— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) November 16, 2012
The Hostess bakers union died the same way as David Carradine.
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) November 16, 2012
This Thanksgiving card someone left me SUCKS. It says “pay me 50 dollars now” and it’s not even a Thanksgiving card it’s a parking ticket :/
— Cait Meisenheimer (@caitmeise) November 19, 2012
just had to fire a prostitute because she kept smiling for the fake crime scene photos i was taking
— john freiler (@johnfreiler) November 21, 2012
“Lincoln” made $34M at the box office Thanksgiving w/e. Audiences flocked b/c they liked seeing a Prez from IL who knew what he was doing.
— MancowMuller (@MancowMuller) November 26, 2012