Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
is being called “Camelot”
It’s true! It’s true! The crown has made it clear.
The climate must be perfect all the year.
A law was made a distant moon ago here:
July and August cannot be too hot.
And there’s a legal limit to the snow here
In Camelot.
The winter is forbidden till December
And exits March the second on the dot.
By order, summer lingers through September
In Camelot.
Camelot! Camelot!
I know it sounds a bit bizarre,
But in Camelot, Camelot
That’s how conditions are.
The rain may never fall till after sundown.
By eight, the morning fog must disappear.
In short, there’s simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Camelot.
Camelot! Camelot!
I know it gives a person pause,
But in Camelot, Camelot
Those are the legal laws.
The snow may never slush upon the hillside.
By nine p.m. the moonlight must appear.
In short, there’s simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Camelot.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
is too see it never rains on Obama’s golf days.
…is to drop the temperature around Langley, Virginia for a few days.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
to see if they can make it rain only in places where Black people live.
…is to make sure it doesn’t rain at polling stations in democratic districts since democrats are less likely to show up in inclement weather.
… is based on an Al Goreithm, of course.
…making lightning strike Snowden.
…buying rights to the song “Who’ll Stop the Rain?”
… together with their second project would make a great name for a rock band: Wolf Blizzard and the Whoricane.
…: make their bottom less foggy.
… was ordered by Obama: hail to the Chief.
@1 You sang to me, walruskkkch 🙂 No new lyrics today? 🙂
…sharknado!
… is to turn Obama’s whirlwind vacations into world-tournadoes.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
to see if they can give LSD to a Hurricane.
Alan Parsons.
to make sure they can blame anything that goes wrong on a video.
try to score with Uma Thurman.
… was a baking-soda volcano on the kitchen table. Sequester!
@12 Actually, I thought the real lyrics worked well enough. How much stupid can you portray the CIA?
… Blizzards in Hell. Too many former Democraps have complained about their current climate.
Restart the weather machine Bush used to make Katrina.
… in honor of Obama, will be half-blackout, half-whiteout.
…to spend $100K to make it rain in a gentleman’s club.
Yeah, I was thinking about that movie, too….
… is to soak the rich.
… is to throw a Royal Baby shower.
@22 I must make my obscure movie references more obscure.
… is to recruit troopers from Homeland Security to control the storms. But what to call them?
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
will be creating a little bit of Mountain Dew.
will be a complete and utter failure but they will salvage some money by selling the film rights to Hollywood.
will be snow since they have some experience in moving that around.
leaked by the White House as a diversion from the…LOOK SQUIRREL!
…will either be a complete failure, and Obama “knew nothing about it,” or a shining success, and the Obama will take credit for it. Gee, it’s like a freaking groundhog. “If the POTUS comes out and sees his shadow….”
…getting the weather to switch between extreme cold and extreme hot so the FLOTUS won’t feel so homesick for her home world.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Since Anonymiss wanted a song.
We’re contollin’ all the rain
Tryin’ to control all the rain,
What a glorious endeavor,
And no it’s not insane.
We’re poking at clouds
So dark, up above,
Raindrops we’ll take apart
Pass the rubber gloves.
We’ll get the clouds to chase.
You from place to place,
Deciding where it will rain
We’ll wipe smiles from your face.
You’ll walk down the lane
And we will drive you insane
Just Controllin’, controllin’ all the rain.
Controllin’ all the rain.
We’re happy again.
Got billions for tryin’ to control all the rain.
Contollin’ all the rain.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
is to take control of the Weather Channel.
…is to set up surveillance and wire taps on Punxsutawney Phil.
… is to get NOAA to build them an ark.
… : a cold shower for Anthony Weiner.
…was contactng Secetary of the Interior, Sally Jewell, to find out if the Bureau of Indian Affairs had a list on its best dancers.
…is to waterboard it.
…involves a Volcano and a Virgin.
…was to hire Hermione Granger.
…was to corner the market on umbrellas…bwwa ha ha haaaaaa!
…was to do research in the cloud.
…was to retire the bonehead who came up with the stupid idea!
…was to make a tornado box.
…is a remake of Rain Man starring Joe Biden and Eric Holder.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
A drone strike in Atlanta
.. recruit every living member of the Weather Underground.
… is called “Operation Wet T-Shirt.” Take that, Secret Service!
… is admittedly kind of small-scale: a Tenth Avenue freeze-out.
… is to find (or create) anything in their mission statement that authorizes this.
…decide to meet only on partly cloudy thursdays, because rainy days and mondays always get me down.
…allow none of those rainy day people to participate. only sunny.
…decide who’ll stop the rain
…let it snow, let it snow, let it snow
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Find them some Rainy Day women, 18 and 35.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
…is to have the Indians, er, um, “Native Americans” do an instructional Rain Dance video and release it on VHS.
… will be to ask for billions of dollars since they already have the crisis
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
is to determine if you actually can’t stop the rain by complaining.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
is to to find out why, there ain’t no sun up in the sky.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
is to bring in a lion, see if it can be made to go out like a lamb.
will be done out on the great lake they call “Gitche Gumee.”
…Now that Obamacare has contraception covered –It’s Raining Men!
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
will be to harness the unlimited amounts of hot air created by Congress on a daily basis.
(to the tune of “Chains Of Love”)
How can I explain
When there is percipitation?
How can I explain
When rains get broken?
Do you remember?
There was a time
When people of the state
Were spyin’ on the sky.
They used to
Dominate the weather,
Makin’ rain together,
Storms would last forever
Come to me. Cover me. Fund me.
Together we’ll make these rains of gov.
Don’t give up.
(Don’t give…)
And don’t give up. (…Up)
Together with me and my CIA,
Make the rains of gov.
…debate whether it’s too late to assassinate John Fogerty.
…hire out the work to subcontractors, pay them with suitcases full of cash, deny any knowledge or involvement.
…trade in their trench coats for Mackintoshes, wait to see if a plan B is needed.
…steal the hats and umbrellas of urban minorities then turn off their water supply, profit from their addiction to rain. Somehow.
…is straight from the White House, recapture lightning in a bottle for an Obama third term.
…play AC/DC really really loud until the weather gives up.
…have DamnCat kidnapped by the ASPCA-CIA and steal his Foggy Bottom joke.
…soften their image by wearing tights and singing “On a clear day you can CIA forever”. Soften it even further by plotting to use Barbara Streisand’s profile to block global warming sunshine.
…arming the Taliban with mobile homes.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
…is to try to control the hot air pouring out of Obama’s mouth.
…
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
attempting to sneak thallium salts to Old Man Winter.
@55 Isn’t Foggy Bottom the nickname for the State Department?
…will decide that the answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind.
…looking for a rainbow
…will be the early morning rain
…will end in disaster due to a foggy mountain breakdown
…will require changes in latitudes, changes in atitudes
walruskkkch, I think the CIA or it’s forerunner was at Foggy Bottom, along with other office buildings of course, before they moved to the Langley location.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
How to make it rain 24/7 over at that building across the way; that will teach those snooty little creeps over at the NSA who the real spys are.
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
How to create a perpetual cold pocket around Carlos Danger – SHRINKAGE!
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Adding so much humidity to the climate of Palm Springs that I never have to hear Nana say, “Yes, it’s a 107, but it’s a DRY heat” again!
#62 spies not spys….sheesh
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Three words: Ski the pyramids!
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Blame Canada!
The CIA is studying how to control the weather. Their first project…
Brain Storm
@55 and 61
foggy bottom was an area of swamp that gathered fog and smoke. it later became home of the state dept.
http://www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foggy_Bottom
@50 and @52 Lovin the songs 🙂
and @29! I hadn’t scrolled up that far… 😀
… is stealing the NSA’s thunder. (OK, hat tip to @62 because he went there first!)
… is removing the poisoned tips from all their umbrellas, to avoid embarrassing accidents.
… is to make both DamnCat and Dohtimes disappear for their “Foggy Bottom” and “On a Clear Day You Can CIA Forever” jokes.
@52 Apostic: Damn you, I can’t get that melody out of my head!
…involves hiring multiple marines to hold umbrellas…just in case.
…will be naming the program “operation good thing we don’t have anything more important to do.”
… harness the hot air in Obama’s speeches.
… Declare bad weather racist.
… Weathermen are SCIENTISTS! So obviously anything that does not go the way they predict is anti-science, just like the weather that refuses to warm up like it’s supposed to.
is controlling the steam in the cia shower room.
Oobleck.
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