The good news is I'm dyslexic. The bad news is I have an amazing support system of family and friends.
— dan guterman (@danguterman) July 24, 2013
Whenever he talks economy, Obama sounds like he's trying to explain to his professor why his term paper will be late.
— Jon Gabriel (@ExJon) July 24, 2013
"If you can't handle me at my worst you don't deserve me at my best" -Someone who is an awful piece of garbage all the time.
— Will Kane (@3rdand10) July 24, 2013
They don't make prequels to porn movies because they would just two hour montages of little girls not getting enough hugs from their dads.
— Jessica (@Schmoodles) July 24, 2013
I expected Obama would say nothing new in his economics speech, but I didn't realize just how innovatively not-new it would be!
— John Podhoretz (@jpodhoretz) July 24, 2013
I'm just glad I'm not the pope. I only know of one guy who survived that job.
— Neal D. (@Neal_Dewing) July 24, 2013