A Better Candidate

(Submitted by Anonymiss of Nuking Politics [High Praise!])

10 Comments

  1. Donald Trump sez: “Pinestraw is stupid. It’s a loser, OK? OK? Total loser. I wouldn’t buy it. What is it, anyway? How can you make straw out of pine needles? I don’t know; I don’t know, but it doesn’t sound appetizing at all for farmyard animals, I can guarantee you that.”

    Pinestrawman argument…

  2. Is that even American Pinestraw? I don’t know. I don’t know, but its worth looking in to. Pines are from Canada. Does that matter? I don’t know. I’m not saying this. Me? I don’t care. Other people are saying this.

  3. The virtue of Pinestraw is that it cleanses your whole environment. Pinestraw is so powerful that even using it conservatively is enough to signal to others that you value clean, healthy spaces and that virtuous peace of mind we all need. Pinestraw is made using Pine Sol and processed pine tree products and the result is a squeaky clean formula for healthy relaxation, especially in those tough, hard-to-clean environments with many people. There is no cleaner way to signal to others that your home or business presents its own intrinsic merit and can be safely visited without contaminating your friends and relatives. But also keep in mind, that when you use Pinestraw, many will find its odor offensive and some will even react strongly enough to leave your premises. This is particularly true in some industrial states like Ohio. So, just remember that when you use Pinestraw, people will either be with you, or against you. But rest assured that you’ve sent the strongest possible signal of healthy, virtuous living to a contaminated world.

  4. @7: No, actually it isn’t with this Jim.

    I’m not fond of any of the candidates.

    But, if Trump becomes the nominee, he’s got my vote. I’ll take my chances with a true American ass over a preaching back-stabber, a squish, a criminal or a Communist.

    Just remember, Conservatives eat their own.

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