Another obviously forged memo? (full details of the memo here) Has the media learned nothing? This time it's about some supposed repulbican [sic] talking points on the Terri Shivo [sic] case, and Patrick Hynes wants a name for this scandal. I suggest "Super Fakey Talking Point Scandal Number One!"

Anyway, the American media is important to a working democracy, so I've decided to help out by explaining to the MSM how to make more competent forgeries. I've been forging things since an early age including pirate treasure maps, UFO photos, Syrian passports, and Bolvian currency. I even forged my own Rathergate memo… much more competently than CBS. Thus, I've learned a thing or two allowing me to write this guide.

THE DOs AND DON'Ts OF FORGING MEMOS

DO research the style of the time period and subject you are going to forge. If you're forging the founding father, then you need those wacky s's that look like f's. Also, if forging a memo from the pope, hold back on the profanity.
DON'T use colloquialism such as "fashizzle" in a forged memo proving that FDR was against private accounts.

DO pay close attention to details of actual memos so as better to forge your own. This might include adding melted cheese stains to your memo if it's supposed to have been written by Michael Moore.
DON'T just "do your own thing, dawg" and hack out your forged memo on napkin using crayon to make a lost letter from Ronald Reagan stating that abortion is "crazy cool!"

DO spell-check your document if you're going to write it using MS Word (the software choice for forgers).
DON'T add clip art to illustrate your point if it's supposed to be a document from the twenties.

DO try to put yourself in the mindset of who you're forging the document of. For instance, if forging a document during WWI, you wouldn't refer to the war as "WWI".
DON'T let anarchism slip into your forgery. Before using whiteout, make sure they had that back in the days of Abraham Lincoln. Also, don't have Lincoln quote from Dude, Where's My Car? as that will bring the memo instantly into question.

Forging is a fun activity, but it also takes time. Remember, it should take longer to forge a document than it took an actual one to be written; that's something whoever hacked on the Rathergate documents on MS Word didn't realize.

Now go make some news!

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