Ryan Seacrest is wearing a slinky on his shirt. And that's okay, because he's supposed to look like a goofball.

Scott 01 - "The Impossible Dream" - oh, either the sound is awful again tonight or Scott's not caressing the mic enough. Ok, he looks good tonight, I like him in the suit. I love that song, so I'm not put off by him tonight. But that last note. Whew. Glad that's over. And there she goes again, Paula with her refusal to allow Simon, the only person with an opinion, to actually voice his. I wonder if she'll be all over him again tonight, and will she dance dance dance for us? One can only dread.

Even before we finished fast-forwarding through the commercials, Frank predicted that Constantine would pick the gayest song. Yep, well-predicted, my love.

Constantine 02 - "My Funny Valentine" - I despise this song, ever since we sang it in a Richard Rodgers night in chorale a couple of years ago. Tonight, Constantine's display of affection for America includes a knee-bend, come-to-bed gesture, and oh, I can't be farther from thinking that, dear me. I actually thought he sang quite well tonight, even after picking such a ridiculous and yawnful song. I didn't hate it, and vocally it was probably his best. I'm not sure what he said in his blah-blah session with Ryan after his performance, but there was more come-to-daddy behavior.

Carrie 03 - "Hello Young Lovers" - The dress is hideous, the earrings are cute, the hair is 80s awful. The song was so boring until the end, and oh wow, the big finish was done in fabulous i'm-the-best fashion . She's awesome, but I stayed up really late the last two nights, and I would ask that she refrain from finishing me off in future episodes. I'm trying to stay awake to kick Frank's butt in Puzzle Kombat!!

Vonzell 04 - "People" - I cringed when I heard what she was going to sing. See above, I do not have the caffeinitude to stay awake for this tonight. Ok, her voice is amazing, she doesn't get near the credit she deserves, and let me just tell you that that was better than anything I've ever heard come out of Barbra Streisand's trap. I do love her look tonight, she is beautiful. And Paula looks close to the edge. I don't know, collagen? Salt? Something medicinal?

Anthony 05 - "Climb Every Mountain" - I actually disagree with Simon. Yes, the beginning was like watching two sloths playing the mating dance, but later on, once he started to build and blah blah, I thought it was pretty good. I go back and forth on him every week. Kill me before you make me listen to him again v. nobody speak or move while he's singing lest I miss a single note. Tonight, one of his better ones. Last note = great.

Nikko 06 - "One Hand One Heart" - He kinda cheated by having that lady sing along like it was a duet. Now that the criticism is out of the way, and we know I'm not a Nikko fan, I actually thought that was his best performance. It was the first time he wasn't singing about all the things he'd like to do to me in the privacy of his bedroom. Actually didn't make me feel dirty.

Anwar 07 - "If Ever I Would Leave You" - Please please please be good tonight. Lemme tell ya, that chamber music piano riff during any song makes my eyes glaze over and my mind wander. Oh, he's back. *Sigh* I clapped for real.

I think Simon's in a mood tonight.

Bo 08 - "some song from Pippin" LOL, I love how he picked his song. Close your eyes and cross your fingers. *giggle* I'm such a sucker. He could say "I chose the song that seemed the most liberal of all the songs" and I would giggle, get excited, and defend him vigorously for his pick. I'm hoping for a Hank Williams Jr. or Toby Keith song next week; seriously, if I heard him sing about Uncle Sam, I might just skip around the room. And would somebody please pour the vodka out of Paula's Coca-Cola cup and give her some coffee? That woman is ailing.

Nadia 09 - "If Ever He Needs Me" - She looks fabulous tonight, I love the coiled hair, the dress, all of it. She was great.

I agree, if you're going to go with a musicals theme, at least please sir, don't allow the boring let's-walk-through-the-park-together-in-the-moonlight-and-talk-about-butterflies songs into the repertoire.

My order tonight:

Bo - because he's my favorite
Nadia
Constantine - and tomorrow I get my head examined
Anwar
Vonzell
Carrie
Anthony
Nikko
Scott