July 01, 2005
Evil Glenn's Independence Day Celebration
Posted by Harvey at 09:22 PM | View blog reactions | Comments (10)

(A FILTHY LIE)

I was strolling through the park recently when I came across a familiar socks-and-sandals-clad figure doing... something... Curious, I inquired...

Harv: Hey Glenn, whatcha doin'

Evil Glenn: GAH! Don't sneak up on me like that. Don't you ever knock?

Harv: Ok [KNOCK!]

Evil Glenn: Ow! My head!

Harv: Happy now?

Evil Glenn [rubbing rapidly swelling knot on his forehead]: It's a start. Anyway, if you MUST know, I'm setting up my Independence Day fireworks celebration by wiring bricks of C-4 to this helpless family of adorable fuzzy little bunny rabbits.

Harv: That's evil!

Evil Glenn: Lawyer.

Harv: Yeah, but this is beyond lawyer evil. It's practically French.

Evil Glenn: Like defending Saddam Hussein against war crimes charges?

Harv: Exactly

Evil Glenn: Well, I was turned down for that gig because I blend puppies.

Harv: Ah, I see, you were too evil.

Evil Glenn: Not evil enough. Jacques Verges uses an industrial paper shredder.

Harv: No wonder he's defending Saddam. Anyway, I'm going to have to stop you from harming those cute little animals

Evil Glenn: It's ok, I'm making them wear eye protection. The won't be harmed, just exploded.

Harv: Well, as long as you're taking precautions, I guess it's ok. Have fun.

Too bad Glenn's a little fuzzy on the concept of "minimum safe distance", because, when I heard the explosion, I turned around and took a picture. This is what I saw:

(see extended entry for exciting conclusion).


(click to enlarge)

Hope those bunnies are ok.
INSTAPUNO DELENDA EST!