When it comes to destroying buildings full of innocent lives, I recommend Israel stop using its military and start using methods that are more socially acceptable to the Middle East; such as ramming buildings with a hijacked airplanes full of screaming women and children. This would remind people of the Religion of Peace. This is good because the press loves the ROP. (Not to be confused with the GOP – which is evil)

This is not an easy decision for Israel, but it's fair to say that it’s running out of options. Threats are everywhere and a Jew isn't safe anymore. In Israel they face Hezbollah, in Seattle they face Christian converts who proclaim, "I'm a Muslim American..." just before unleashing death and mayhem, and here in California, a Jew can't go anywhere without being harassed by Mel Gibson.

Additionally, this strategy could help the Israelis start to get better press coverage, mostly because these new actions would make the press confuse the Jews with the Religion of Peace. I can just see that Press Conference with President Bush and Israel.

Israeli Spokesman: We did not bomb that bus full of Boy Scouts. We swear!! We have evidence that those bodies were dead before we dropped a bomb on it.

Helen Thomas: So what you're saying is that you have no regret over desecrating the bodies of young innocent boys?

Israeli Spokesman: (Getting desperate) that’s not what I meant at all.

These press conferences end badly. Mostly because – and these is simply a dramatic tool - Helen Thomas keeps a dead Lebanese baby in her purse. Bad press conferences would be a thing of the past if the Jews would simply change strategy.

Press Conference (Post ROP Strategy)

Helen Thomas: Why did you bomb that bus full of innocent Boy Scouts on their way to the Adopt a Homeless Puppy convention??

Israel Spokesman: We felt compelled to strike a blow at the infidels in the name of our God.

Helen Thomas: I want you to know that I respect your religion.

Another huge advantage to acting like the ROP is that nobody every blames them for ANYTHING! Even the stuff they demand credit for!!

On videotape:

Osama Bin Laden: Our organization is very bored. As a show of Muslim solidarity we have decided to burn France to the ground.

Jacques Chirac. We blame America. And the Jews. But mostly Jewish Americans. And Poverty which is the root cause of all violence.

There you have it. Israel, if you're reading this, make sure that you post this idea at your country's web site. Don't forget to give that link to IMAO for helping you through a very trying time. We must remember to fight the enemy on all fronts. Israel - you keep fighting Hezbollah with all your might.

We'll keep an eye on Mel Gibson.

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