“The exercise of one’s vote is like a punch to a liberal’s dumb monkey face.” -Thomas Jefferson

“We once handled tyrants with a musket to the junk, but now we vote them out of office. I prefer the former, but the latter will do.” -George Washington

“Every time a conservative votes, God kills a hippie.” -Ronald Reagan

“It wasn’t God. I’m the one killing the hippies.” -Fred Thompson

Today is the day. Obama was all like, “I can do what I want! None of the dumb stoopids can stop me!” And then he looked at calendar and was like, “What? What is this day? I do not like this day! This is bad!” And then he curled up in the corner and put his security bucket over his head. For it is Election Day, the day we formerly respond to Obama’s and the Democrats’ job performance. It is a time to “punish our enemies,” and Obama foolishly made himself the enemy of the American people.

First off, remember to go out and vote. This is important thing number one.

Second, there is no second. Voting is only important thing.

Later we can watch the fun tonight. Tonight would be a very good night to get over Twitter-phobia and follow me there as I’ll probably be hanging out there a lot, but I’ll also put up some updates on the blog as things happen. Also, a great place to follow results will be Nate Silver’s blog at the NYTimes — probably the best thing ever to come out of the NYTimes. I know he’s supposed to be a lefty, but you really can’t tell from his blogging — just straight facts. Anyway, he has a good model to tell how things are going as soon as the earliest results come in.

And the most important thing is to have fun.

…No, wait; the most important thing is Obama not have fun. In fact, we want him to vomit in sadness. And Pelosi to have some sort of mental break. And Reid… well who care about Reid because he’ll be leaving office.

So vote and hope for good things! Be honorable, ronin.