Kennedy

Q: What’s the problem with the headline “Kennedy Pleads Guilty To DUI” released by the AP?


A: So many to choose from.

12 Comments

  1. I have a question: HOW DID THEY KNOW HE WAS DRUNK?
    I mean, the guy looks/acts like he’s drunk all the time.
    (Tuesday 1:00 p.m.)
    COP: Can you walk that white line, Mr. Kennedy?
    KENNEDY: No problem. (Falls down every time he tries to stand up)
    COP: Okay. Drive safely, sir.
    (Wednesday 1:00 a.m.)
    COP: Could you please walk that white line, Mr. Kennedy?
    KENNEDY: What (burp) white line?
    COP: Sir, please turn around and put hour hands behind your back.
    KENNEDY: Are you coming on to me, officer? (burp) That’s sexual hassessment — harnessment — har — that’s illegal, you know. I know all about that (burp) stuff.

  2. Woops, excuse me. He claims he was on drugs instead of alcohol. I wasn’t expecting that. Retracted.
    I love the statement given to reporters, though…
    “He’s feeling great and is excited to be back to work.”
    He’s in our government. Be afraid. Be very, very afraid.

  3. So the cops go over the Kennedy compound to arrest the perp. They knock on the door and are brought into the family dining room where all the Kennedys look up from lunch.
    “OK, we’re here to bring you in on the DUI charge.” As the entire throng rises to their feet, one cop says to the other, “Cripes, Sarge, we should have brought the paddy wagon!”

  4. Just as an interesting- well rather sad and pathetic- sidenote; my high school Spanish teacher (I live in CA and I’m taking Spanish, suprise, suprise) compared Kennedy’s “addiction” to prescription drugs to Rush Limbaugh’s actual addiction to OxyContin.

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