(A Precision Guided Humor Assignment)
Recently Jeanine Pirro announced her intention to run for Hillary Clinton’s Senate seat in 2006. As a patriotic American, I feel it’s my duty to support her by offering the following suggestions for campaign slogans:
“Pirro 2006: Her husband may have cheated on his taxes, but at least he didn’t cheat on her with a chubby intern.”
“Pirro 2006: Won’t disgrace herself by showing slide shows of her family reunion set to the tune of ‘Dueling Banjos‘” (moderately work safe, but hard to justify – via BoingBoing)
“Pirro 2006: She won’t dance around the issues.”
“Pirro 2006: Never lost a billing record.”
“Pirro 2006: Leaving cattle futures to the cowboys.”
“Pirro 2006: Her other car ISN’T a broom.”
“Pirro 2006: Because sometimes it’s just WRONG to wear a bikini”
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“Pirro 2006: She can stay awake for an entire State of the Union Address.”
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“Pirro 2006: Because as far as we know, this is the only thing Hillary stands for.”
Feel free to show your patriotism in the comments.
FIRST!!!
Pirro 2006: Looks a lot less like Emperor Palpatine!
Pirro 2006: she’s got page 10!
Pirro 2006: Do YOU have page 10?
Pirro 2006: Because taking money from the mob is a Republican Family Value.
Pirro 2006: Because Bernard Kerik wasn’t enough.
Hillary Clinton IS Nixon in a skirt.
Why is Hillary Clinton doing the Macarena in a men’s restroom?
Why are the cops off camera? Let’s see the rest of her arrest processing.
Think outside the box, people. Remember how Rove got Dean his job at the DNC?
Exactly! Now, let us help Hillary.
Nillary 2006: “Because there’s no a shred of evidence of any wrongdoing on my part.
“Well, come to think of it, there are shreds, but good luck putting them all back together Mister”