Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
“…will do just the opposite.”
…eliminate all math functions except division.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
will ask them if they “identify” as computers at the moment.
will leave us nothing to work with but Abacuses.
will rely on his keen intellect and extensive knowledge of mathematics and programming.
will require even newer technology to calculate the cost to the taxpayers.
… is designed to make My Little Pony videos on Netflix come up faster.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
will eliminate the inherent racism and sexism of a device create by white men,
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
does not compute.
will…Danger! Danger Will Robinson. Danger!
will involve the phrase “Klaatu barada nikto”.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
will help make it easier for foreign governments to hack US computers, thus improving our foreign relations.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
will be handled by the same people who did such a great job with the Obamacare website.
…involves uttering the phrase:
“That’s one small step for man; one giant quantum leap for computers.” At which point, he’ll eat ice cream.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
will include a self-destruct mechanism in case of subpoena.
might be able to handle a game of checkers.
involves “self-Awarness” and we all know where that leads ya.
If you like your computer, you can keep your computer.
…will extend voting rights to all except the very old. (286 or older) we can’t have trash80s voting when Radio Shack is going under.
…will replace all the zeros with smiley faces.
…will make even your great grandma the most over qualified hacker in the county.
…bombard them with gamma rays, have radioactive spiders bite them and have them say Shazam when booting up.
…involves nationalizing all computer programming and placing control under the same folks who rolled out the Obamacare websites.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
…will hide government emails better.
…takes us back to the days of WindowsME and 9600 baud modems. You got a 14.4? WOW!
…is a front to funnel $$$ to the DNC, Planned Parenthood and Unions.
…will involve everyone to give up freedom for a little security.
…work closely with Neil Degrasse Tyson to create an unhackable system!
…will still result in garbage in garbage out
… starts with passing a law requiring everyone to purchase a computer …
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
will remain in the “concept” stage for many years, sucking in taxpayer money, but will never actually produce a plan since each time they get through to a proposal that everyone on the committee agrees upon they will find that the marketplace beat them to the punch and their ideas are some 5 years behind the technology curve.
President Obama’s plan to improve computers…
… will cause them to reboot upon entry into any website not pleasing The King.
… on a good day, can play Pong or Space Invaders.
… somehow involves 7 inch floppies and 8 track players.
. . . will work just as well as the Obamacare websites
. . . will come in over budget and take three times as long as planned
…will preface all output with the words: “Because of Global Warming…”.
…will, by executive order, make Silicon Valley a federally run lunch room.
…will add a glass front case with a hammer inside to all Democrat owned commieputers.
…has already been paid for by arrangement with a trusted Nigerian prince.
…will store information with your server today Trixie, recently laid off when the minimum wage increased in her city.
….make them FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!111!!!!
…removes all delete functions…
… will make them all PC, remove “Command” and “Control,” and turn over the “ALT” function to M. Jenner.
President Obama’s Plan to Improve Computers…
shows people that hard drive platters make excellent mirrors. (Honestly! I use one when shaving sometimes.)
Now where’s my slide rule, sounds like I’ll need it.