With terrorism still on the loose and North Korea setting off nukes (or, at least, trying to), the Democrats have figured this is the time to go to the right of the Bush administration and show the American public that they are the only ones with the ability to intimidate America’s enemies. Just look at this campaign e-mail I got from the DNC:
THE ONLY THING AMERICA’S ENEMIES FEAR ARE THE DEMOCRATS!
While terrorists, Iran, and North Korea are walking all over President Bush and the Republicans, the Democrats have what it takes to strike fear in the hearts of those who would do us harm. Just listen to soon to be Senator from Connecticut Ned Lamont:
“Currently, my only political position is that I’m against the Iraq War, but soon I’ll have lots of other positions! Strong ones!”
Democrats already have a long history of standing up to Bush, and soon we’re going to stand up to America’s enemies as well. Your soon to be Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi knows no fear:
“You think terrorists can intimidate me? I live in San Francisco where are things constantly happening in the streets that would reduce a grown man to tears!”
Democrats have dealt with the wrath of God and the incompetence of Bush. New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin will find any other challenge to be a cakewalk:
“Terrorists, rogue states, white people – quiver in fear before our chocolate power!”
With Marines like Representative John Murtha, the Democrats know how to handle conflict:
“If our enemies attack, you can be assured we’ll be waiting for them in Okinawa! That’s a guarantee, and my integrity is not for sale… at least not on the first date!”
You can rest assured that, if America is attacked, Democrats will spring to action and increase taxes on the rich. Isn’t that right, soon to be Majority Leader Harry Reid?
“You think you can take me on? I have Mafia connections! Ever seen the movie Casino? That Smothers Brother was portraying me!”
Democrats know how to cause fear. Just listen to the conscience of the Senate, Robert Byrd:
“I have a long history of intimidating people. Just give me a cross and some matches, and I’ll chase the undesirables out of our neighborhood.”
And it’s not just the senior Senators who know how to protect America. Here’s rising star Senator Barack Obama:
“Fear me and my widely proclaimed articulateness!”
And if you want leadership, the Democrats are the only ones with the Kennedys:
“BOOZE! WHERE’S MY PAHHNTS AND MY BOOZE!”
And do you think that the terrorists would still be bothering us if John Kerry, who, by the way, served in Vietnam, was in charge?
“We’ll search everywhere for Osama and the terrorists. And, when we find them, will rape them, cut off their ears, cut off their heads, tape wires from portable telephones to their genitals and turn the power on, cut off their limbs, blow up their bodies, shoot civilians, and raze their villages in fashion reminiscent of Jenjis Khan! You don’t believe me? DON’T YOU KNOW WHO I AM!”
The Democrats know how to handle enemies. No one will attack America is they know they’ll have the Democrats to deal with. Isn’t that right Michigan Governor Jennifer Granholm?
“I’m pretty!”
And that’s a fact!
Remember: There’s nothing scarier than Democrats in power!
Okay, I’m confused… terrorists fear the Democrats because they wish to eradicate the radical form of Islam that spawns milit… wait, no, not that one… is it that they fear Democrats for the way they rallied world support for the war on terr… nope, not that one either… oh, I got it… since many Muslims terrorists are homosexuals due to their views on a woman’s inferiority, and the terrorists use the internet to communicate, they’re scared that the DNC will track their sexually charged IM’s to their “underage” pupils and out them just in time for fall elections, causing many terrorists to resign in disgrace!
I actually shuddered when I saw the Picture of Ted Kennedy. Is it just me or does he really look a lot like one of those Deep-Sea Angler Fishes or what?
I’m sorry, but that fat Bastards is scary. And on the issue of Terrorists fearing the Democrats? You can’t tell me there’ not at least ONE terrorist out there who is scared of this freakshow that is the Democratic Party.
Anyhoo, I’m going back to reloading my .44 Mag SA Ruger.
…
aaah, scary images fading..fading…
gone.
//Remember: There’s nothing scarier than Democrats in power!//
Ain’t that the truth! Although the picture of Nancy Pelosi comes pretty close.
“Fear me and my widely proclaimed articulateness!”
Very funny
Ned Lamont looks like that dufus that faked it that he killed Jon Benet…someone needs to check his emails and IM’s! As for the rest of these pricks…well…get ready because they are about to take over. Once they do they will mandate that Homosexuality is mandatory and that Heterosexual Sex is no longer legal!
Does Jennifer Granholm play the role of “Sam” on Stargate SG-1? …and on a similar note, is it possible that Nancy Pelosi is a Dalek? …JF’nKerry a Teletubby? …Uncle Teddy a Ring Wraith? …Harry Reid…Golum? …Spacemonkey…a minion of the Wicked Witch of the West?
Is it just me or does Murtha look like Larry The Cable Guy in the above picture?
Let me rephrase your statement.
There is nothing scarier than THOSE democrats in power.
Oh and in her defense she IS pretty.
Everybody else you got pretty good though.
If Democrats get power, I hope that they go after terrorists with the same tenacity as they’re currently going after perverted ex-congressmen.
Ha! Who am I kidding?
Sometimes I wish JFK were in office so all the terrorists would die and Democrats would quit whining about it. Unfortunately, there are very few JFK Democrats left.
You do not need to repeat it, just the thought gives me shivers. I’m with you H.K. Every firearm that I own will be loaded if they win.
//Nancy Pelosi is a Dalek?//
I thought she was a ferengi…
Is it just me, or does Teddy K. have a lazy eye in that picture? It’s like he’s looking at two differnt people at the same time, or searching for his pants with one eye and his bottle of scotch with the other.
Oh, and he looks possessed, too.
When I was working in DC Teddy was often to be seen looking much worse than this. Without handlers, minders, caffeine providers and fawning minions, he lapses into his natural self. Which, amusing as all the suggestions posted here may be, is actually Jabba the Hut. With every Democratic female under the age of 35 playing the part of Princess Leia, whether she wants to or not.
How to remember Senator Barack Obama’s name:
First name: think Egypt. Hosni Mubarak.
Last name: think al-Qā’idah. Osama bin Ladin.
Aaauugh! He has a mole! (Channelling Austin Powers) Moley moley moley!
That is one seriously heinous picture of La Kennedy. Like, just-lost-my-lunch hideous. Was that REALLY necessary??
Who wouldn’t fear a party who’s war plan was taken from Monty Python….
…Run away! Run away!……
Bravely bold Sir Clinton
Bravely ran away
Bravely ran away away…
When China reared it’s ugly head
he sold missile plans to the reds
When Osama Bin Laden came about
Valiently he chickened out
When Mogadisu came to it’s feet
he beat a very brave retreat
Bravely bravely bold, Sir Clinton!
Oh, Shimauma, I agree…Nancy Pelosi is definately a Ferengi.
Red Ted is a hut (as in Jaba)…or is it Michael Mooron? I don’t see the diferance between the two.
Do you realy think that our enemies are afraid of these jackasses i mean some of them looks like androids