In all my talk about giant robots, dinosaurs with rocket launchers, and space lasers, some of you think I haven’t paid enough attention to railguns. I’ve decided you have a point, so you won’t be banned (for now).
Unlike the other things, we’re making clear progress on railguns. For the longest time, scientists looked at the magnets holding up pictures of their nephews on the refrigerator and wondered how they could be used to kill people. The answer is railguns. Railguns use two magnetized rails to launch a projectile and was name after its first designer, Tommy P. Railgun. Magnetism more efficiently transfers energy to the projectile, making it fly even faster than a projectile launched by explosives.
Some wonder why a railgun still has a muzzle flash even though gunpowder isn’t used. This is just from its shear awesomeness. The air actually sets itself on fire in the presence of a railgun just to show it’s approval. This is also why a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick has a muzzle flash.
The proposed application of the railgun is to be used in military arenas where we need to be extra awesome. The proposed name for this is “Operation Look at Our Awesome Railguns”. Basically, we’ll have the Taliban cornered in some cave and then surround and pummel them with railguns. That will have to do until we can put railguns on the more logical platform: Giant battlemechs.
Science!
In the meantime, let’s use ’em as a replacement for steam catapults on carriers. Our enemies will quail in terror when they see electromagnetic catapults launching fighters at ’em. Where’s USSJC on this issue?
And if you ever run out of ammo (something the Democrats in DC want to ensure ), you just put a can of Spam in the catapult and launch it at the enemy. I’d bet a nickel you could sink an enemy ship with a can of Spam that way.
But, is there a plan in place yet to mount railguns on dinosaurs?
[Dinosaurs don’t like magnets. -Ed.]
Why are we wasting money on this sissy magnet crap when we could give every registered member of the Awesomely Awesome Conservative Awesome Party a helicopter, a mini-gun, and a mount for the mini-gun?
I’m still stuck on Frank J hating Sarah Palin! Regarding railguns…I don’t care what else you do with them if you promise to strap Barney Frank onto a chunk of steel and fire him up Obama’s ass the next time he bends over to apologize for being such a tool!
[The main thing that’s been delaying railguns is Sarah Palin. -Ed.]
now if we could use hippies and monkeys as the railgun projectiles.
I just knew Ed would show up! So, if Palin came out for railguns, that would do it for you, Frank?
OK, Palin, come out in favor of railguns! And quit being so ‘nice.’ Show us your claws and fangs.
what would be better a Mexi-railgun or the Mexi-cannon???
Don’t we need to defeat the level boss to get the railgun?
“For the longest time, scientists looked at the magnets holding up pictures of their nephews on the refrigerator and wondered how they could be used to kill people. The answer is railguns”
If humor was measured like Olympic gymnastics id say you stuck the landing.
Railguns aren’t available at amazon.com yet; I just checked.
Ecofreaks with mass-transit fetishes want to get us out of our cars and onto high-speed trains. When we tell them we’re working on a rail system that goes like 8000fps on a single magnetic impulse, they’re going to be very excited.
railguns go pffft. No boom!! no likey pffft. Want boom!!
Like cannon. cannon go BOOM! gun go boom. likey cannon and gun.
Rocket go pffft BOOM. Really likey rocket.
Sarah Palin go Boom!! Like Palin, Frank go ehhh poof? Verdict still out.
Yeah but what good is awesome weaponry if we have a Pu$$y-in-Chief who is too afraid to use it?
Wait a minute here….. did somebody say Frank is a “poof”?? I thought he was married? Or is that just his cover to hide his poofiness? Im startin to wonder bout this Frank guy….. first it was the whole “twitter” thing, (cant get much poofier than twitter) and now the hatin of Ms. Palin. Everybody knows real men love Ms. Palin
Does the boom have to be from the gun for it to be cool? Because the projectile from the railgun creates a sonic boom. but what is even cooler than than a weapon with a big boom? A weapon that makes a big boom but has a silencer! Think like stealth Dinosaurs. And therefor I will state that we need to be researching a silencer for railgun projectiles as well as continued research of railguns.
Railguns are awsome. The SDF1 had rail guns, and they stopped the Zentradi from destroying earth… Oh wait no they didn’t. What about a gigantic cannon in Alaska that’s powered by Earths magnetic field? Is Science! working on that?
Can you attach the rails to the floor trim? That way, when the cat runs by me into the house, I could throw the switch on the railgun/floor trim, propelling the cat back out the door. Or into the door. Either works.
How are you going to put a silencer on the Sonic Boom! That’s why it’s called a BOOM! You can’t silence a BOOM! Geez! Some guys just don’t get Science the way the rest of us get it real good!
Railguns are so yesterday.
It’s the orbiting platform used to launch smart-tungsten-rod inertia weapons that are the wave of the future.
You’ve all seen the pix of smart bombs delivered by aero-based weapons platforms to take out trucks, buildings, etc. in the last couple of decades.
See. The tungsten rods won’t sublimate (burn up) on reentry (kind of like TIG welding). Their on-board smart electronics can be used for laser-homing for precision targeting, or GPS for general battlefield use.
They’re relatively light (low boost cost). The inertial impact of even small rods from even near-Earth orbit would be …call it very interesting to watch what it does to, say, a terrorist training camp. Or a small mountain even. Or …heh …maybe a deeply buried reactor that is churning out weapons grade materials for fission/fusion war-tech. Heh. I repeat, heh.
……..
And if we ain’t already got that shit in orbit, someone in the 5 Side isn’t using our Nevada R&D investment very wisely.
Railguns are gay, because they do not shoot rails. If they shot rails– say, nice big rails that a train would ride on– well, then, that would be worth something, wouldn’t it.
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