43 Comments

1. Thou shalt not try to fool all of the people all of the time…

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2. Verily I say unto you eat only crispy bacon.

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   • Thanks. Now that’s all I can think of.

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     • Great.

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       Like everybody else.

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3. Thou shalt not stand in the front of a cashier line talking on a phone rather than paying.

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4. People who can’t define gender will be cursed to the seventh son of the seventh son.

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5. So let it be Rittenhouse, so let it be done.

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6. . . . will be ignored by Democrats, just like the original ten.

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7. “Thou shalt not read the teleprompter word for word”

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   • “Repeat sentence.”

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     • President Biden: What?

       Vice-President Harris: “Meeting is adjourned”.

       President Biden: It is?

       Vice-President Harris: No, you “say” that, Mr. President.

       President Biden: What?

       Vice President Harris: “Meeting is adjourned”.

       President Biden: It is?

       Vice President Harris: [sighs, then gives the president a new bill raising taxes further] Here, play around with this for awhile.

       President Biden: Thank you, Kamel.

       Vice President Harris: No, it’s Kamela!

       President Biden: It is?

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       • I know I have posted the above before but it seemed to fit in so well with this thread.

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       • Also Biden, “affairs in Ukraine take precedent over affairs in the US.”

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         • Biden: “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go walk the precipice. Parapet.”

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           • Precipice? Parapet? Kamala clearly wrote “plank” in the teleprompter.

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8. “Thou shall avoid Satan’s honking by devoting full attention to the traffic light when thy is sitting first in line at the intersection.”

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   • That’s an interesting way of trying to say “Move Bi*$h, get out the way”. It sounds more biblical, but it’s harder to bob your head to.

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9. The newest Commandment: . . .

   Mess with IMAO you get “The Bird”.

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10. The newest Commandment: . . .

    The number of the counting shall be three…

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    • Five is right out.

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11. Do it thou, but only for Randolph Scott.

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      • Great.

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12. The newest Commandment: . . .

    Do unto others, then split.

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13. Always.., no, wait, Never…

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14. Those who do not work at least two jobs, shall not eat.

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15. …shall not be infringed is not open to interpretation.

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16. Don’t mess with Uncle Bubba when he’s been drinking.

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17. . . . crispy, crispy bacon . . .

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18. Remember thus: There shall be a place of no bacon, the reason, the eternity, the proof of hell. Vegans welcome!

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19. Thou shalt be offended.

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20. Remember the SLOTD and keep it wholly.

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21. Thou shalt not covet poutine from the Canadians, for thine is our cheese curds, the potatoes and gravy, digestion taking for ever and ever…C’mon Man..

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22. The newest Commandment: . .

    …Go forth and find a tv channel worth watching…

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23. 1. Honor thy mother’s and father’s interchangeable personal pronouns.

    2. Strive thou, verily, always to get “interchangeable” in Scrabble.

    3. Remember always faith, hope, and charity; but the greatest of these is the one with IRS-allowed deductions.

    4. Am I my bra there’s keeper?

    5. Verily, verily, verily, verily: life is but a dream.

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24. Thou shalt pledge to give the Big Guy his 10% for to miss will verily tithe him off..

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25. The newest Commandment: . . .

    tanstaafl.

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    • Great.

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      Where were you when we were asking about additional creatures for this site, my good man?

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