All you people that don’t think Barack Obama is awesome and wonderful and a gift sent down from Heaven are just too stupid to understand what he’s trying to do.

You know, as good a communicator as he is, it would still take Barack Obama six months to explain something to you. That’s what he told Time magazine.

The president says he also wants to do a better job of explaining to the public how his policies will help the economy grow. Obama claims he didn’t do a good enough job selling Americans on the stimulus plan and the auto company bailout because he was so focused on acting to fix the economy.

“[W]e were in the midst of a once-in-a-lifetime crisis, so we had to just do stuff fast. And sometimes it wasn’t popular,” Obama told Time. “And we didn’t have the luxury of six months to explain exactly what we were doing with the Recovery Act, which was basically a jobs act and making-sure-middle-class-families-didn’t-fall-into-poverty act.”

So, it’s your fault. If you weren’t so darn stupid, it wouldn’t take him six months to explain everything to you.

And, if you were just smart enough to understand what he was doing, it would have worked. So, but because you’re so stupid and didn’t understand what he was doing, all that money he pissed away didn’t help.

Try to not be so stupid.

Licking a flag pole in Winter is smarter than voting for Obama.

Presidents’ second terms are usually not as good as the first. Obama’s 2nd term will be teh suck.

Why would I say that? I mean, there’s no way he could suck as bad in his second term as he did in his first, right?

WRONG!!!

Let’s look at history. Okay, who’s the oldest person here?

Okay, everybody put your hands down. Is there anyone here born before 1950? 1940? Oh, heck, 1900? No one?

That’s our starting point. We’ll cover all the presidents who won re-election all our lifetimes, m’kay?

Let’s see. 1900. That was William McKinley, and he was re-elected in 1900. He got shot. That sucks.

Teddy Roosevelt finished McKinley’s term, then got elected again in 1904. That’s when he proposed income taxes (this was before the 16th Amendment, remember) and inheritance taxes, both of which passed shortly after he left office, along with the creation of the Federal Reserve. Tell me that second term didn’t suck.

Woodrow Wilson was re-elected in 1914 1916. His second term included World War I and the League of Nations, forerunner to the United Nations. He implemented segregation laws in Washington (for segregation, not against). Oh, and then the whole having a stroke thing happened. That second term sucked.

Franklin Roosevelt was re-elected in 1936, and never would leave office. He finally had to go to Warm Springs, Georgia and die to get him out of the Oval Office. He made government really, really huge. He extended the Great Depression by screwing with the economy, instead of leaving it alone and letting it right itself in 18 months like it would have. World War II started in his second term, which sucked. Of course, it took his attention off screwing with the economy and expanding government, and the economy suddenly got better, but a lot of soldiers died. So, his second and third terms sucked. He died in his fourth. Which sucked.

Harry Truman, so full of promise after nuking his way to victory in World War II, won in 1948 and, within two years, we were in another war. Plus, he fired MacArthur. Truman let Commies in the government, but you can almost excuse that, since there’s not a hill of beans difference between a Commie and a Democrat. Oh, and a couple of Puerto Ricans shot at him. That sucked.

Dwight Eisenhower was re-elected in 1956 and then had heart attacks about every third day. The Soviets orbited satellites while ours blew up on the launch pad. And, Hawaii became a state, allowing their fake birth certificates to be used to put idiots in the White House. Then, there was the whole deal with taking over from the French in a little place called Vietnam. You might have heard of that. His second term sucked.

Lyndon Johnson got to keep his office job at 1600 Pennsylvania after winning the 1964 election. Remember that Vietnam thing Eisenhower got us into? Johnson doubled down. Hippies were running wild in the streets and left-wingers were blowing up college buildings and shooting people. They waited until after he left office to land on the moon, his second term sucked so bad.

Nixon was re-elected in 1972. Watergate. I don’t need to go any further, do I? His second term sucked.

Ronald Reagan’s second term had Iran-Contra, which led to a bunch of folks going to jail. He failed to get Robert Bork on the Supreme Court, and we wound up with Anthony Kennedy instead. And, a Space Shuttle blew up. Reagan’s second term kinda sucked.

Bill Clinton was re-elected in 1996. He was impeached in his second term. That kinda sucked.

George W. Bush was re-elected in 2004. A year later, somebody in Georgia (not ours, the other one) threw a grenade at him. He didn’t tell the military to kick everyone’s ass and come home in his first term, and that lead to the Democrats taking over Congress in 2006. That sucked big time.

Now, you’re wondering why I left out Calvin Coolidge. Well, it turns out that Calvin Coolidge is the anomaly of this group. He kept the presidency by winning the 1924 election, and then cut taxes, reduced regulation, and the economy flourished. He’s the only president to do a great job in his second term.

So, what would happen if Barack Obama won a second term? Well, you can be damn sure he won’t cut taxes and reduce regulation, and that the economy won’t flourish.

You think his first term was bad? If even good presidents like Reagan, Bush, Truman, and Eisenhower can screw up their second term, what do you think a born screw-up like Barack Obama will do?

Don’t even want to think about it.

It’s no secret that I think Barack Obama is an idiot. And that I think that those that voted for Obama are idiots. But, during certain times of the year, I try to put that kind of stuff aside and do the whole “can’t we all play nice” kind of thing.

For example, Frank usually posts stuff about holidays here. Over at my little blog, I’ve posted proclamations by the current president regarding Thanksgiving (2009) and Veterans Day (2009, 2010).

Why not Veterans Day proclamation post? Simple. The current president didn’t issue any such proclamation this year. Check for yourself. Find one for Thanksgiving, too.

Oh, and find one for Christmas. Not just for this year, but for any of the three Christmases since he occupied the Oval Office. They don’t exist. The last Presidential Proclamation regarding Christmas came from President George W. Bush in 2008.

Now, you will find a proclamation on Hanukkah for this year. But you won’t find one for last year. I suppose after this year’s missteps regarding Israel, he did this, hoping to mend fences. But, Obama being Obama, he screwed it up. Though the proclamation got the dates right, the actual ceremony was 12 days off— and all jacked up.

He did issue a statement on Kwanzaa this year, as well as in 2010 and 2009. Maybe if Kwanzaa was more than 45 years old, he’d issue a proclamation. Till then, made-up holidays got to take what they can get, I suppose.

Anyway, about Obama. There’s no hope for this guy. And, if you are planning on voting for him in 2012, there’s no hope for you. And, if he wins, there’s no hope for any of us.