My buddy, Mad Max, so wants to caption this picture of the president. So, I thought I’d offer him the opportunity. But, I decided to make it a challenge by opening it up to everyone here.
Keep it clean. Mostly clean, at least. And the best caption wins … HIGH PRAISE!
“I’m pinching your head!”
Asked about the flurry of allegations that Harry Reid is a pederast, President Obama had only this as his response:
* I’m this far ahead of Jimmy Carter as worst president ever
* Itsy-bitsy spider adds a tasty crunch to a Schnauzer sandwich
* I’m this close to being done with this confusing job.
* This tiny violin is for business owners.
* In my hand is the prototype for my amazing new algae-powered fuel system.
The rumor simple ain’t true. Michelle does not go down all the way. She goes this much
Our internal polling shows I have this much chance of winning in November.
Face it, I have this much credibility left.
What do you mean I can’t force choke my way to lower unemployment?
Why don’t I fire Eric Holder? Because there’s only *this* much room left under my bus.
“This is how much I like you, America.”
Let me be clear, I did just get out of the pool
Harry Reid told me this is how much Romney paid in taxes during the last ten years
“Women are bad at math because they’re told this is eight inches. But I can assure my supporters that this is 8.3 percent.”
I admit it, business owners deserve a little credit. Probably, this much.
I’m not that hungry. Just a little dog, please.
Actually Michelle’s is this much longer than mine.
Don’t call my bluff. I’m this close to doing nothing. I have a 9 a.m golf time.
I’m HUGE in Lilliput.
…but you don’t use a fork, you simply pull away small strips of the dog with your fingers when eating it.
Okay, let’s try it again. When I snap my fingers you will all believe that I am awesome. …damn, okay one more time.
…and after years of training, I became so skillful that I could catch a fly in mid air between my two fingers just like this without causing any harm, and then release him. No really. Stop laughing!
Ok, OK, you built *this* much of that business. Now are you happy?
It only takes this much tequila to make me want to roll in the hay with Pelosi…
Gimme a big campaign donation now or I’ll give you such a pinch!
I have at least “this much” black in me…
Joe…Joe…JOE! Settle down now…inside voice.
All Americans get to keep this much income.
Really! It’s only this long. Ask Michelle. Ask Valerie.
I’m this close to calling you “Monday” dude.
I told this much truth in the last 3 years.
Level of Prior Job Experience
“I find your lack of faith in socialism disturbing.”
Going for the “interception”
Choom Gang secret greeting hand signal
smallest violin in the world playing “my heart bleeds for america”
All I want is a slice of poodle this thick. No more, no less.
“I shall cut spending as much as my ____ is long.”
In the vein of LOL Cats: “Invisible joint!”
Or,
“So, there I was holding Harry Reid’s entire brain, like this.”
“I like Harry Reid, he has scruples. Yeah, about this much! HAHAHAHA!!!”
“If only the stimulus were twice as big, I could have moved unemployment down twice as much. It would have moved unemployment down about this far total.”
“Michelle’s boob belts are so sexy. I am like, totally, this aroused!”
Well yeah, I think SCOTUS will agree that guns can only be this big and still legal.
This is how much I really care about things like ‘gay marriage’.
You’re unemployed? And over your head in debt and about to lose your home and all you’ve worked for all these years? I’m playing the world’s saddest song on the world’s smallest violin for you. Because it serves you right for voting Republican.
I’m not kidding!
That thing you heard about Black men isn’t true.
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This is the reason I never say I’m half white.