[High Praise! to The Fine Report via The People’s Cube]

Ok, Obama’s mustache is a bit gratuitous, but this is still a good piece.

Obama: “So what’s this thing we’re standing in front of, do?”

Gronet: “It’s a conveyor belt.”

Obama: “Like what’s holding up the pants on this gigantic suit they just made me put on? Whose jacket is this anyways, Chris Christie’s? My wife’s?”

Gronet: “No, no – this belt conveys things.”

Obama: “Does it go left to right, or right to left?”

Gronet: “Good question. I never saw it move.”

Obama: “How come there’s nothing moving?”

Gronet: “What do you mean?”

Obama: “There’s nothing on the conveyor. How come nothing is being moved around?”

Gronet: (laughs) “We don’t ‘move’ anything here because we don’t make anything here! I take that back: we make money. And a lot of it.”
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Click here to read the rest at The Fine Report.

[via Very Demotivational]

It’s a digital image I found on the internet. What more proof do you need?

TELL THE TRUTH, HARRY!

The first rule of taking the high road is don’t talk about how you’re taking the high road.

— Nate Silver (@fivethirtyeight) August 16, 2012

Nobody would feel safe around a house cat the size of a golden retriever.

— Dan McLaughlin (@baseballcrank) August 16, 2012

If you look at a clock in the mirror it tells you the time in China

— FREE FACTS™ ! (@FREE_FACTS) August 16, 2012

Remember the time when Joker bashed Batman with a wrench and said “Meanwhile, back at the WRENCH” I was totally on his side for that moment

— Carly Monardo (@whirringblender) August 16, 2012

Dana Milibank calls out the absurdity of calling the Family Research Council a “hate group” which is good, but to balance things out, he makes a few fact-less assertions that the left all take as articles of faith such as the right being much more angry than the left and that leads to violence (he mentions Glenn Beck followers becoming violent — who?).

People talk about Mitt Romney’s faith being odd, but the religious belief of the left that the right are angry and violent has to be the weirdest religion of all.

So is MSNBC ever going to get called on for their blatant racism in hiring Touré? The guy is a pea-brain who’s only shtick is finding increasingly absurd things to accuse of racism (while, of course, doing it in a purely partisan manner such as leaving Biden off the hook because these sorts of people never care about racism beyond using accusations of it as a political cudgel), and MSNBC saw him and thought, “This is guy is pretty smart for a black man,” and put him on TV. I mean, really, you have to have as dim a view of black people as a KKK member to think Touré is someone exceptional and worth hearing.

So we need to tell MSNBC to stop the racism. Give Touré a more appropriate job for someone of his intellectual rigor. Like janitor.

Reacting to accusation from Romney that he has a “campaign of division and anger and hate”, Obama said, “I don’t think you or anybody who’s been watching the campaign would say, yes, that in any way we have tried to divide the country.” He then made a series of similar statements.

“No one would say I’ve raised the deficit.”

“No one would say I have a VP with the intellectual capacity of pumpkin.”

“No one would say I’ve played golf.”

“No one would say I’m a useless nitwit with no practical economic experience.”

“No one would ever say I use a teleprompter.”

“No one would say I’ve been more concerned about left-wing solutions to health care than jobs.”

“No one would say I’m named Obama.”

“No one would say I’m a horrible failure that makes us reexamine how harsh we were on Jimmy Carter.”

“No one would say I’m black.”