[No High Praise! to Frank J, since it’s his job to make IMAO awesome anyway]
Somewhere in the last decade, car insurance commercials – especially Allstate – started showing car-crashes in their commercials. Before that, the actual impact was omitted. Artistically, the theory was that implying a horrible thing was more powerful than showing it.
In this video, they actually show the impact, and – in this particular case – I think doing so makes the message more powerful. Stick with it all the way to the end, and see if you agree.
Oh, and if you’re afflicted with language sensitivities, don’t read the end credits:
[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #2,484,824)
That was a cool vid, and it kinda reinforces what I’ve been claiming for years now: Driving faster is safer, and I’ll prove it to you… A person who spends no time on the roads has a zero likelihood of being in an accident. Correct? A person who is on the road a lot has a comparatively high chance of being in an accident. Correct? So, the likelihood of being in an accident is proportionate to the amount of time one spends on the road. Making sense so far?
Therefore…
Get a high-performance car and drive as fast as you farkin’ can, to minimize the amount of time spent on the road. You’ll be safer, I promise!
Moochelle has found a new solution to the fat kid problem.
Why was the fender already crushed? How many dictators had this woman already hit?
I think this might be fake, cars with anti-lock brakes don’t make screeching noises when they stop and Hitler could never fit in that box. At least we know she’s American, illegals just keep on driving after they hit someone and then get deported without going to jail.
Well, neutrinos travel at nearly the speed of light, and they almost never hit anything.
And tachyons always travel faster than the speed of light, allowing for the potential to go backwards in time and kill Hitler.
The point is, ladies and gentleman, that speed, for lack of a better word, is good.
Woman in car: Well I missed that bastard Hitler but at least I nailed that SOB Stalin at the last crosswalk.
Pedestrians don’t roll over the top of cars @ 60mph, they bounce off like a basketball off a backboard.
Don’t ask how I know this.