As you know, Obama doesn’t want Republicans listening to Rush Limbaugh because that could hamper his plans to turn America Communist. I mean, Obama will have all these new laws and taxes he’ll want passed right away, but from noon to 3pm he won’t be able to do anything because the Republicans would be listening to Rush Limbaugh. Here’s some other instructions Obama gave Republicans:
OBAMA INSTRUCTIONS FOR REPUBLICANS
* Don’t bother reading the details of the stimulus bill; it’s boring.
* Stop sneaking up behind me and flicking my ears.
* In bills about the war, stop replacing the word “terrorist” with “Obama’s close personal friends.”
* Don’t get all hung up on this “capitalism” thing.
* Stop confusing my name with Osama. We’re very different. He has a beard and I don’t.
* Stop worrying about whether my cabinet is a bunch of law breakers; their job is to make laws, not follow them.
* Stop warning the American public about my secret police; then they won’t be secret anymore.
* Stop bringing up my wife’s odd, mannish features.
* Don’t tell me what’s happened on Lost; it’s on the Tivo and I haven’t had a chance to watch it yet.
* Stop saying, “Give me freedom or give me death.” Neither of those are on the table right now.
“Live Free or Die.”
* Quit telling me I smell like B.O., its B.H.O.
* Don’t bother talking about me when I am not around. I can hear everything. In fact, my ears are so big, they will not get an interrupted signal in the transition from Analog to Digital.
Stop breathing…Muwhahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!
Stop calling my Secretary of State “Pudgy Fat and Skanky”
Stop hiding Nancy Pelosi’s gavel in Barney Frank’s pants
Stop and remember, I won…Muwahahahahahahahahah!!!
“There ain’t a dime’s worth of difference between the National Democrats and the National Republicans.”
“Do you know who said that, my Republican friends? George Corley Wallace. And he was right. Now put up and shut up!”
I feel like playing the Caddyshack “Shut up! You’ll get nothing and like it!” clip in an endless loop.
“* In bills about the war, stop replacing the word “terrorist” with “Obama’s close personal friends.”
LOL Frank!
When Hopey says that he wants policy discussions with less [fewer] politics, this translates as:
–Republicans in Congress need to stop talking. (Unless you’re a RINO).
—Anyone who disagrees with my agenda needs to stop talking. (And do it now).
–We need to come together in unity. (Everyone is entitled to MY opinion).
–We need a “diversity” of opinions in the media. (Talk radio must be reigned in because of dissident, anti-establishment views and, after that, I’ll squelch the blogosphere).
Listen closely friends, and read between the lines. BHO is quite adept at saying one thing and meaning another.
At least everyone knew that B.J. Clinton was a bald-faced liar.
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/rwj/2009/01/27/how-much-i-support-our-president/#more-32262
* Stop asking why Michelle keeps threatening John Boehner with her Bat’leth.
I’ve reviewed your alternate plans to mine… LOL! Are you guys kidding? A President is measured by how he stands up to his opposition and I have to tell you that so far I’m really disappointed in you bitches! Now get back to work and give me something to object to or I’m gonna put a cap in yo’ ass, Cracker!
yet more instructions from Jepettos pet:
Stop thinking your money doesn’t belong to the government
Stop thinking that acorn is a bad organization unworthy of a bailout
Stop thinking that I care about the country
.. unless you are an unborn baby in some far-flung 3rd world country… then death really is on the table as of… 5.. 4.. 3.. 2..
Hey Barry, thanks for the shout-out. Can’t buy that much publicity!
Hail, Caesar! Beware the Ides of March! (stay out of the senate on Toga Fridays).
How Dare you question The ONE! Be cowed…and have your bank routing numbers and checking account number ready for massive electronic withdrawals. Stand by to execute….
Oh…and never fear…it will hurt So GOOD!
…Quit doing that “ahaluakbar” prayer call thing to me when I don’t have an East pointing compass on me.
… Stop the petty arguing with me, there will be plenty of time for that AFTER
I have been given the economic and political power only a Czar could imaginethe crisis has passedStop calling my bailout/stimulus plans thinly disguised socialist nationalization of our economy.
As a bone fide descendant of Patrick Henry, I am compelled to inform you that the quote is “give me liberty or give me death!” The full quote: Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!”
Oops, I messed the quote for “Stop saying, “Give me freedom or give me death.” Neither of those are on the table right now.” up
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