Both Rasmussen and Zogby now have Obama polling below 50% in his approval rating. Since IMAO is non-partisan, I thought I’d give some tips to Obama on how to improve his polls numbers.
WAYS OBAMA CAN BECOME MORE POPULAR
* When North Korea or Iran threaten to get nuclear weapons, like do something about it.
* Stop wearing a Che Guevara t-shirt.
* Also, stop supporting socialist dictators in more substantial ways.
* Don’t always just take a penny from the penny dish; sometimes leave a penny. Other people need pennies too.
* When going abroad, stop pretending to be a Canadian.
* Also, stop whispering to every foreign leader “I was actually born in your country.”
* I know you love taxes, but reconsider the harsh “Being an Orphan” Tax.
* Stop referring to Americans as “the little people.”
* Or “crackers.”
* As you drive through cities in your presidential limo, stop flipping off cops.
* When foreign dignitaries express a desire to you to see America destroyed, disagree with them.
* New policy for you on the economy: Sit in the corner and don’t touch anything.
When saying the Pledge of Allegiance, stop replacing the words “under God” with “under Me”.
h/t cjtony97
Obama could exchange his healthcare program for a unicorn care program. Less unicorns than people, so it xhould be cheaper.
Blame the rich for all the problems in the country and promise to tax the bejeebers out of them and cut everyone else a check for a bazillion dollars!
Oh, and “friend” everyone on Facebook!
[Why does Ron Paul’s son’s name always makes me laugh? -Ed.]
All the most popular people i know have valid US birth certificates, maybe he could do something related to that.
Start calling yourself by your old, friendly slave name, Barry.
Start smoking in public. We identify with people with vices.
Release all your school records. We identify with people who struggled in school.
Say you’re sorry to Officer Crowley and the Cambridge police. Because of you they now are going to sit through endless workshops on racism.
Adopt a child. You have room for one. You would probably get re-elected with that gesture. ugh
Tell the truth that Twitter is way Gay and should not be done unless one is Gay as the day is long!
When potential appointees answer “no” to the question “Have you paid your taxes?”, place their folder on the “Do Not Appoint” pile.
How about if there were someway he could get the Mainstream Media to hang on every word his teleprompter tells him to say. If only he could get them to run cover for all of his insanely expensive socialist/communist social programs! If were only possible to…
Oh, wait! Never mind!
Have Rahm “pay a visit” to Mr Zogby and Mr Rasmussen.
Leave.
Ways Mr. Obama can be more popular:
* Put Malia and Sasha (and BO) on Obamacare.
* Move to Cuba (or Europe).
* Take Reid, Pelosi, Graham, and Sortamayonnaise with him.
* Start dating the Octomom.
Stop being president.
Be a ‘do nothing’ president.
Turn brain to ‘think’ mode instead of ‘mindless zombie who hates America and everything it stands for’ mode
Star in the new NBC reality show ‘So you think you can be president’
Be smart enough, good enough, and doggone-it people will like you.
When you interrupt a press briefing to apologize to a cop for calling him “stupid”, actually apologize to the the cop for calling him “stupid”.
Marco says…….Leave. However if he leaves, Joe the Vice-President will become “The Man” do we really want that?
Instead of always talking, trying to teach people about topics you are ignorant about – like being an American – maybe shut up from time to time and try to learn something.
Be right-handed. As a lefty, I would be happier if I did not share that trait with you.
Punch Barney Frank in his mush-mouth. When he complains, call him a racist.
Don’t you read the HuffPo? He was merely scratching his nose.
Two words: FREE. PIE.
Invite FrankJ over for a beer. Let him hold the “football.”
And Frank had an earlier post about the lines of succession if Obama leaves. Everyone seems to think that Biden would be a terrible President – but would he actually be worse than Obama? Speaking off the cuff (or sometimes on the cuff), he speaks far more truthfully than does his scripted boss.
“Russians…have a shrinking population base, they have a withering economy, they have a banking sector and structure that is not likely to be able to withstand the next 15 years, they’re in a situation where the world is changing before them and they’re clinging to something in the past that is not sustainable.” AGREED
His remark on the federal bail-out of AIG – “I don’t think they should be bailed out by the federal government.” AGREED
His remark on the campaign ad mocking McCain’s lack of computer proficiency – “the spot …was “terrible. I didn’t know we did it and if I had anything to do with it, we would have never done it.” AGREED
His statement during the VP debate, that “Drill we must.” AGREED
His observation that you needed a slight Indian accent to walk into a Dunkin’ Donuts or 7-11 in Delaware. AGREED (well, maybe not this one).
Right there we have
fivefour-and-a-half statements of truth, which is about five more that Obama has made.I thought the “football” was now called the “soccer ball” in deference to Obama’s West African Socialist/Marxist roots…
Fire Biden.
Appoint Palin as VP.
Then leave.
Plus, Biden clearly has ADD and therefore could not stick with any thought long enough to cause any real damage. “Is this my office?”, “Has anyone seen my shoes?” Those are problems from which America could recover. Unlike Che Barry’s havoc wreaking extraordinaire.
Obama could be more popular if he’d punch Pelsoi and Waxman in the face then let Biden off his leash and let him use them as chew toys for awhile.
1) Activate the Axelrod Astoturfers to flood the Net with O-bot drivel. 2)Have Biden remind America that you’re an articulate,bright and clean,nice looking African American. 3)Be a REAL man and clean up after your dog, the hired help has better things to do. 4) Invite Joe the Plumber and Tito the Builder to the White House for beers, along with Sgt. Crowley and Skippy Gates. Sure to be a ‘teachable moment’ 5) Admit that it’s your brain that needs recalibration, not your words.
I want to see a youtube of Obama accidentally snapping a rat trap on his anatomy. That would (briefly) make him more popular with me.
Stop appointing Communists as Czars.
Stop interrupting all my favorite shows with your “press conferences”.
On the point of Biden being more dangerous than Obama: He might be liberal, but I don’t think he’s a Marxist and he’s certainly not bright enough to do the kind of damage Obama is doing to this country. Yeah, let Obama resign. The craziness of President Biden and VP Pelosi would be funnier than any reality show on TV today.
Get on American Idol and sing ALL EIGHT VERSES of:
AMERICA
My country, ’tis of Thee
My country, ’tis of Thee,
Sweet Land of Liberty
Of thee I sing;
Land where my fathers died,
Land of the pilgrims’ pride,
From every mountain side
Let Freedom ring.
My native country, thee,
Land of the noble free,
Thy name I love;
I love thy rocks and rills,
Thy woods and templed hills,
My heart with rapture thrills
Like that above.
Let music swell the breeze,
And ring from all the trees
Sweet Freedom’s song;
Let mortal tongues awake;
Let all that breathe partake;
Let rocks their silence break,
The sound prolong.
Our fathers’ God to Thee,
Author of Liberty,
To thee we sing,
Long may our land be bright
With Freedom’s holy light,
Protect us by thy might
Great God, our King.
Our glorious Land to-day,
‘Neath Education’s sway,
Soars upward still.
Its hills of learning fair,
Whose bounties all may share,
behold them everywhere
On vale and hill!
Thy safeguard, Liberty,
The school shall ever be,
Our Nation’s pride!
No tyrant hand shall smite,
While with encircling might
All here are taught the Right
With Truth allied.
Beneath Heaven’s gracious will
The stars of progress still
Our course do sway;
In unity sublime
To broader heights we climb,
Triumphant over Time,
God speeds our way!
Grand birthright of our sires,
Our altars and our fires
Keep we still pure!
Our starry flag unfurled,
The hope of all the world,
In peace and light impearled,
God hold secure!
After singing all 8 verses, release all your records that your million dollars has been paid to lawyers for withholding all your school records, medical records, marriage records, birth records, etc. from the public.
Then resign. Then give the administration over to John McCain and Sarah Palin. That should do the trick.
4 ways THE OBAMA could be more popular:1 Shoot Joe Biden 2 shoot Nancy Pelosi 3 shoot Robert Byrd 4 shoot himself !
Island girl: THE OBAMA can not produce a birth certificate, Kenya did not issue birth certificates in 1961. Besides I hear Muslims don’t believe in birth records.
“Ways Obama Could Be More Popular”
Stop hating white people and stop destroying America. That would be a good start.
Fight Aquaman and WIN!
BREAKING:
Jim Bunning is retiring. Now we can run Rand Paul for the Kentucky senate!!
We still have to worry about former Clinton delegate Trey Grayson who has infiltrated the GOP primary, but hopefully Rand can defeat him.
I think you’ve hit on it, PammyV — President Biden and Veep Pelosi. That puts the oval Office on a hamster wheel and gets that screeching weasel out of Congress before mid-term elections. Plus, watching the cat-fight between Pelosi and Hillary would be even more entertaining than So You Think You Can Dance, especially if Hillary’s elbow hasn’t healed yet.
So, yeah, Young President, leave. Take Michelle with you — you can leave Sasha and Malia if you’d like. They’re pretty cute.
More popular? Start telling the public that Madonna has been on your healthcare system for over a year now.
He would be immensely more popular after a state funeral.
Do something that meets with the approval of Mr Fred Thompson. Then let Mr. Fred Thompson punch you in your dumb monkey face for being an idiot the rest of the time. One Mr. Fred Thompson punch and you will think twice about doing stupid ever again!
Stop trolling on IMAO.
Most importantly; GIVE ME MY FREAKING FREE UNICORN. After all the crap you’ve shoved down my throat, I think it’s fine time you actually followed through on one of your promises!
Move back to Kenya and do your health care there. And take your husband with you.
Then there is the matter of extinguishing the shrillery who is squatting on the horizon.
I know, make shrillery your Kenyan czar assistant of health, welfare and broomsticks and your husband your czar ceo of fashion. But stay in Kenya.
How ’bout if he wore a tee shirt to his next press conference that had printed on it this phrase: ‘We eat, therefore we hunt.’
Forget cap and trade. If CO2 is the problem, for gosh sake, stop flapping your gums every day on TV. It isn’t really about you, after all.
It’s about America. Try being a statesman, not a Chicago street organizer, and for the good of America, throw away that dog-earred copy of Rules-for Radicals and pick up a copy of the US Constitution and a bible (one without an imprimatur by the Rev. (whitey is evil)Wright.)
If you must apologize -apologize to the thosands of babies you’ve already cause to be slaughtered.