When Galaxies Collide

…we are doomed!

Did you know the Andromeda Galaxy is predicted to collide with our galaxy in 2.5 billion years? No one told me this! That has to be disastrous! All the stars and other bodies will be thrown out of their regular obits! What the hell are we going to do?

I always thought we had 5 billion years to get off this planet before our sun dies. That hardly seems worthy of rushing. But instead we have 2.5 billions years to get out of this galaxy. Intergalactic travel? How can we manage that? And most of the nearest galaxies are satellites of the Milky Way or Andromeda. I assume they’re not safe either. We need a plan to get millions of light years away from here. And we need one yesterday.

Where the hell is the space program?!

43 Comments

  1. No worries. Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid are introducing legislation banning the Andromeda Galaxy from coming any nearer to the Milky Way. Obama says that any further encroachement by the Andromeda Galaxy is unacceptable and that he simply won’t allow it.

  2. the Andromeda Galaxy is predicted to collide with our galaxy in 2.5 billion years…

    OH CRAP!!!!!!!! Wait Al Gore says Globull Warming will kill us in 10,000 years so I guess it’s all good then.

  3. Are we supposed to start feeling the first effects in 2.5 billion years? Or is it 2.5 billion years until total annihilation? After we work through this global warming thing, that will be the next big issue, I’m sure.

    It’s probably worse than that. Since it takes years for light from the Andromeda Galaxy to reach us, it’s already a LOT closer than when we last checked.

  4. Maybe if we change the name of the Milky Way to the Chuck Norris Way, Andromeda will change course. It will if it knows what’s good for it.

    That’s the Chuck Norris Way.

    BTW, the Evony chick is REEALLY distracting.

  5. We certainly should be able to build a Stargate within 2.5 billion years. Heck, with 2.5 billion years we should be able to evolve into beings that can fold time and space. That is, IF evolution is true. Remember, if you believe it, you can achieve it. :~)

  6. What, you guys are still worried about such trivial things as our sun turning dim or two galaxies smashing into each other?

    Here I am, hiding under a table, afraid to do anything as it will contribute to the heat death of the universe.

    C’mon, there are bigger problems than this, man! And stargates won’t solve this one!

  7. Our space program needs to mine asteroids for minerals and heavy metals then toss the leftovers at the Andromeda galaxy, after 2.5 billion years of this it should have pulverized Andromeda enough to soften the impact on the milky way.

  8. Rubeus,

    You wanna see real action. John Boehner might just write one of his letters, forcefully stating that he strongly disapproves.

    And, as usual, the democrats will read it and laugh.

  9. Basil says “Put up a sign that declares the Milky Way an “Andromeda-Free Zone.” Problem solved.”

    hey it worked for Vancouver. We have signs that say Vancouver is a Nuclear weapons free zone – and so far nobody blew us up.

    It’s nice how people respect signs.

  10. I find it hard to believe that a crappy TV show starring Kevin Sorbo actually has the ability to destroy the entire galaxy. But then again, I find it hard to believe that one person could run a country into the ground so quickly.

  11. I have the answer! One word! TAXES! We must pay more TAXES to fend off this deadly scourge now! Please vote for only candidates that want your TAXES higher so that we can fight this problem and win! TAXES must be raised now or we will not be able to fend off this approaching doom! Vote for TAXES in your next election! Vote democRAT!

  12. It looks like a great time for me to start selling Galaxy Offsets, and start a cap and trade system with Galaxy Credits. Even if I make a couple hundred dollars a year, I’ll be pretty well off in 2.5 billion years.

  13. Andromeda Galaxy must be turned gay! This will repel our Galaxy which is very NOT GaY! I propose we teach Andromeda to Twitter which will turn it Gay in 1 hour and problem is solved! I very smart!

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