Anti Soda Tax Conspiracy

I keep getting e-mails from people concerned about a soda tax, and it’s creeping me out. Like, once every couple weeks, I get an e-mail — always a different person — saying something like, “Can you believe these people are talking about making a soda tax!” And there’s a link to some new story mentioning a soda tax. And I thought it was a legitimate concerned reader the first time, but not after the second time. Because no one ever e-mails me about serious issues, and am I to really to believe out of all the issues out there concerning conservatives, I’m going to keep getting e-mails from readers about a soda tax?

Obviously, this is astroturf, and that creeps me out for some reason. More so than a possible soda tax. As I’ve said, it’s always a different person (or claims to be a different person), but I’ve noticed a pattern. The e-mail is always of the form [firstname].[lastname][possible number]@gmail.com. I don’t know how knowing that pattern helps me — or what I’m event trying to do about this that I need help towards — but finding patterns makes me feel like a detective.

Stop astroturfing me, Big Soda! And bring back the real sugar version of Mountain Dew.

32 Comments

  1. a few months ago I came across a few (mentally) agited activists outside a Walmart with a petition. They told me that the Demo-commies were going to Tax my water.

    So I asked them, “..what water? Bottled water? My water useage? or the water that runoffs on of my roof?” Thier answer was anything, and everything, from bottled water, to candy bars, to underwear elastic!!

    BUT thats not what it said on the Petition they were pushing! And they were so freaked out they didn’t even know it!! These guys were even crazier than the nuttiest Libs! Guess who they endorse for President in 2012? I’ll give ya a clue its not a Republican or a Democrat.

  2. I’ve been disillusioned with soda ever since new coke and crystal pepsi went off the market.
    BTW, a number of states already have a wealth re-distribution soda tax in the form of a bottle deposit. I buy a can of soda, then, because I’m a cold-hearted, planet-hating conservative, throw the empty can on the ground, and along comes some bum, who scoops up the can and returns it for MY nickel (dime if I’m in MI).

  3. Leftards have been pushing soda taxes for years. This might be part of funding O-bah-muhhCare, or it may be more local, as NYC, and Philadelphia have done already. Always oppose Government taking more of your money; it’s a simple, tried and true principle.

  4. Obama makes all these promises but I have yet to receive my lifetime supply of Frozen Run Black Bear birch beer. And now the spammers – harbingers of destruction – say taxes are on the way. If he taxes ginger ale, my stomach aches will be worse and I will have to throw up on Democrats or cats.

  5. @BobsSon
    Odd, I send emails asking if they are satisfied with the size of my p*nis. Never thought about emails asking if I was content with it. I guess some introspection would be good. If only I had friends who were that thoughtful. 🙁

    (this is a joke in case it isn’t clear and someone I know is reading this)

  6. @TT Flat Tax?

    -I think those poor girls have a tough enough time. Bobs son and I were just talking about a similar issue. Would flat girls and small p*nised men be more likely to make less then 250k dollars a year? If so a flat tax or tiny junk tax would be yet another campaign promise broken by Obama against those who clearly could least afford it.

  7. I personally think it’s time to go after Big Booze. After all booze has more calories than soda, people drink more booze percentage wise than soda, drinking and driving after drinking soda is not illegal (as of yet) and I have never heard of anyone getting cirrhosis of the liver from soda.

    And yes I know all about prohibition (that pesky degree in history again) but after all we didn’t have “the one” in charge then. Our leaders were just men, no more no less, not the demi gods and goddesses they are now. I’m sure under their benevolent leadership people will give up alcohol voluntarily along with ” devil white sugar, refined flour, desserts, and any and all snack foods. After all Gaia (Mrs. Obama in disguise) has declared just that on numerous occasions. We’d best get on the train or she’ll make sure we’re run over by it. Kindly, lovingly but with an iron fist, after all if people are starving “let them eat…………..tofu. It just doesn’t have the same ring, does it.

  8. Ohio actually passed this back about 15 years ago (give or take) and it was our RINOs that pushed it over. Their selling point was that it was a tax on manufacturers, not consumers, so it wouldn’t hurt tax payers.

    Because, you know, manufacturers print their own money and pay taxes with that money. And even worse than the RINOs pushing it, the voters approved it by 2/3s margin.

    It is still in effect today.

  9. I remember the Ohio tax…good ol’ George Voinovich, he of crying on the Senate floor over John Bolton, was Governor then and nearly had a hissy fit when the tax met resistance. I remember some of the local stores posting signs showing the original price, then adding in the 1 or 2 cent tax (I forget which). Ohio has a strong history of RINO-ness (Bob Taft & Mike DeWine being other recent examples), which often leaves us saddled with genuine liberal crackpots (Howard Metzenbaum, Sherrod Brown, even John Glenn, which really sucks cuz he was an awesome astronaut).

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