It’s Friday, so you know it’s time for the wire services to post the non sequitur non-news story of Mahmoud Abbas praying at a mosque.
However, this week’s different… this week we’re going to start a new feature called:
So, from Mahmoud Abbas’ expressions, can you tell what Mahmoud Abbas is praying for?
Is it:
a) Saeb Erekat to give him his glasses back.
b) Okay, he’s got them back. How about a headquarters in a hollowed-out volcano… preferrably one not surrounded by Jews!
c) His acne to clear up.
d) New shoes. Like… um… Air Jordanians.
or
e) NONE OF THE ABOVE
Put your guesses in the comments.
He praying the Jews don’t discover they have gills when they’re all pushed into the sea.
Photo d: Praying for UN aid funds to be released so they can fix the automatic hand dryer in the mosque men’s room.
c:
Realizes when his wife leaves to visit her mother for the weekend, he’ll be Home Alone.
d:
Praying to get the Joos to give up huge tracks of land to continue the peace process.
He’s praying that for Christmas he’ll get a Cobra Commander action figure.
He’s praying that the Transformer movie won’t suck. (He better pray harder).
C) Ishtar’s teats, that day-old falafel has pulled out my fillings! Allah, be merciful, let there be some Anbesol left at the Wahabbi-Mart…
D) Shoes off? Check.
Seated comfortably? Check.
Head bowed? Check.
Hands stained with blood? Check.
To be let into the Legion of Doom!
C: Looking at his grandchildren and exclaiming, “Kids, they blow up so fast!”
I saw those cool hats (picture b.) for sale at a Christmas kiosk in the mall. For an extra buck an a half, you can get your name on it in glitter.
He is praying that his lover Kofi someone becomes Head of the UN again.
He’s praying for a quick death being surounded by idiots and morons!
D: I think he ceased praying at that point, it looks like he is concerned with something that is in his lap, perhaps he crapped his pants.
a) Please may all those bloggers stop watching me already!
b) How about if I just ignore them? Will they go away?
c) Aw crap, it isn’t working!
d) This is really getting to me… Have to take a seat… Just give me a second…
A. For advanced notice when it’s his turn to bring the rice crispy treats… I swear that was not for another month, and hear I am today with no snacks and……
B. One of those hats like the other guys, except one that holds two beers
C. A discount chemical peel, then maybe some oil of olay
D. I think the guy next to me knows I just cut one…
OWA TANA SIAM. OWA TANA SIAM. OWA TANA SIAM. OWA TANA SIAM. OWA TANA SIAM.
A. Somebody farted
B. We’re grabbing our stomachs to hurl from the fumes.
C. Someone again, oh Allah, the fumes.
D. Ohhh, it’s just my socks.