If you have room to build one in your backyard, an octagon is an efficient way to settle disputes. A thunderdome also works, but many HOAs have regulations against them.
Never give up. No matter how many people tell you it can’t be done, no matter how tired and beat down you are, no matter how many members of mall security are currently screaming at you, and no matter how sane or rational it seems, never ever give up.
Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. For arch-nemeses, you should consider getting a place together. Just be warned, though, that he may not always pony up his half the rent since he is trying to destroy you.
Always stand up for your principles. Like, if you’re sitting with friends talking about stuff and your principles come up, stand up before you mention them. That lets people know they’re important. It’s dangerous on a Ferris wheel, though.
Scientific research comparing sticking with your friends through thick and thin versus abandoning them in their time of need and finding new friends shows that the latter has significant cost savings.
Lord, give me the patience to explain things to liberals who can have their minds change, the strength to punch in the face those who can’t, and the wisdom to know the difference.
When life gives you lemons, ask to see the receipt to make sure life didn’t shoplift them. Basically what I’m saying is that life is a liar and a thief so don’t trust it or its free gift of lemons.
