Exclusive interview with Ellie Light
There have been news reports recently of letters to the editor in many newspapers all across the nation … signed by Ellie Light.
All claimed to be local, meaning that either Ellie Light had homes in over a dozen states, or there are lots of people named Ellie Light, and they all think — and write — exactly alike.
“Astroturfing” was the suspicion. “Sock puppets” was the charge.
As it turns out, we have located Ellie Light. And there are many Ellie Lights. Here’s a transcript of our exclusive interview:
Thank you, Ellie, for taking the time to talk with us.
It’s my pleasure.
There have been charges that you are actually a front for members of the Obama administration. What do you say to that?
That’s ridiculous! I am a red-blooded American male, uh, woman, who loves his country and supports the greatest, smartest, bestest person ever elected to the presidency, Barack J. Obama.
You mean Barack Hussein Obama?
Racist!
Um, hmmm, ah. Well, Ellie, how do you explain that you’ve signed letters claiming to live in different cities across America?
I have no idea what you’re talking about. I live in Cleveland, and have always lived in Cleveland. I don’t know anything about anyone named Ellie Light in Philadelphia.
I didn’t say anything about Philadelphia.
Yes you did. But I didn’t write that.
Then who did?
I did.
Who are you?
I’m Ellie Light. I live in Philadelphia. Have my whole life. And I support Barack Obama. He’s so smart, sexy, and manly — and he’s such a great president!
So, there are two of you named Ellie Light?
More than two.
Who are you?
I’m Ellie Light. I live in Baltimore.
Just how many of you are there?
How many do you need?
(22 votes, average: 4.77 out of 5)
Loading ...Tags: Politics
January 25th, 2010 at 8:28 pm
Just so you know, I have arranged an extended interview with Ellie’s brother, Bud Light this Wednesday evening during President Obama’s little chat. As a teaser, I can now confirm that “Bud” is just a nickname. His full Name is Donzer Lee Light. I will report back on Thursday.
January 25th, 2010 at 8:34 pm
So Nancy Pelosi is Ellie Light, The Mona Lisa, and Marilyn Monroe. Wow who know.
January 25th, 2010 at 8:35 pm
I meant Knew not know.
January 25th, 2010 at 8:50 pm
[...] with Ellie Light IMAO Blog Archive Exclusive interview with Ellie Light ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Background on EL. She sounds like Michelle O [...]
January 25th, 2010 at 10:04 pm
“Ellie” is the daughter of President Bartlett in “the West Wing”, and the title of episode 37. Probably NOT a coincidence.
January 25th, 2010 at 10:08 pm
Well, it’s easy enough to figure out where Ellie is really from, just ask to see her birth certificate. I don’t see where she, or anyone, would have a problem producing their birth certificate in order to quickly set the record straight.
January 26th, 2010 at 1:27 am
I wonder if White House Astroturfer was a job saved or created by the stimulas. If so, will they count it as 1 job total or on job per residence?
January 26th, 2010 at 9:54 am
Ellie Light is the sister of Rolo Tomasi, and is currently married to famed criminal mastermind/businessman Kaiser Sose. Thus she has to keep a low profile…and they do move around a lot due to certain business interests of her husband. It should be noted that her husband was once on the short list for an Obama Administration appoint to Attorney General but was removed from the list when it was disclosed that even though a criminal he…. never cheated on his federal taxes.
January 26th, 2010 at 12:37 pm
I wonder if the fingerprints on the letters all match, Or are there any fingerprints, as crime scene gloves don’t leave prints.