* It’s February 29th — Leap Day. An extra day you get this year. So, as an American, it means an extra day for you to be awesome. So try a new meal with bacon and punch an extra hippie and blow something up. As Americans, we need to be using every day to its fullest, so this year should be 1/365th more awesome than the previous year.
* So from out of nowhere this Romney guy comes in to win both Arizona and Michigan primaries.
Seriously, though, are we back to Romney being inevitable? I know I’m hoping this primary gets wrapped up next Tuesday — the super of Tuesdays. It’s not that I like Romney as much as I’m just tried of the stupid primary and want to focus on how bad Obama is. Why can’t we just focus on him? He’s awful.
* Olympia Snowe is retiring. You know her; she’s kept a seat warm in the Senate for years while tsking all those mean conservatives. Republicans are panicked because they don’t think they’ll be able to replace her. Is it really that hard to find some boring moderate Republican who vows to never to do anything useful that might upset the status quo? I’m pretty sure there’s oodles of them just sitting around chiding others for being extreme while offering absolutely no solutions for the problems of bloated government and increasing debt.
Or we could just train a dog for the job. One bark yes, two barks no. It would be a big change to have a senator who is loyal.
* Apparently students in Georgetown are going broke with all the contraception they have to buy. Really? That’s not just regular slutty, that’s like super mega slutty. Anyone buying that much contraception should probably be writing it off on her taxes as a business expense.
It used to be freedom was having access to contraception. Now freedom is forcing someone else to buy contraception for you — which isn’t really freedom at all. Well, less freedom, more loose women.
* Gitmo detainees are getting a $750,000 soccer field. That’s outrageous. Not so much the cost as much as we’re letting our enemies play a stupid European sport on our dime. We can’t have terrorists run around for ninety minutes to end in a 0-0 tie; that will just reinforce their angry, terroristy behavior. Teach them some useful productive sports. Build them a football field. Give them each a football. And then tackle them. Bam! That’s how we do things in America! And, I guess, also how we do things when we’re in Cuba.
* This is pretty inevitable: The endangered species act has led to mass slaughter of animals. Yes to help save the spotted owl, they’re going to kill off another owl. Law to save animals plus bureaucracy equals mass slaughter.
So what will health care plus government bureaucracy equal?
* Wisdom of the Day from Jonah Goldberg:
Ed Schultz is on MSNBC complaining about “Bullies.” Like Jesse Ventura complaining about gravelly-voiced paranoid nut jobs.
* Apparently prehistoric penguins stood nearly five feet tall. Scientists estimate they were the world’s deadliest creatures ever and possibly killed off the dinosaurs. Maybe using laser rifles. Five foot penguins with laser rifles — that’s why you only stick to historic times. Because the time before things were historic — the prehistoric times — were crazy.
Personally I have always viewed contraceptives, being a guy that means condoms, as being like insurance, if you can’t afford it, can you really afford not to have it? And if you absolutely can’t afford it, don’t put yourself in the position to need it.
I could not disagree more regarding the Gitmo soccer.
There is no better way to turn terrorists into a bunch of Euro-pansies than to have them play soccer. I’m not sure this was the military’s intention – I suspect they were just tired of watching the jihadis playing their usual favorite sport, naked wrestling.
Why don’t we send the Georgetown sluts down to GITMO so they can have sex on the $750,000 soccer field? When the terrorists are done with them they can just conveniently dissolve them in acid. No clean-up required!
I believe the latin name for a prehistoric 5-foot tall penguin is “nun.”
News outlets are starting to report that they suspect that Ted Turner might be crazy…something that many of us have known for 15 years at least.
Maybe in another 15 or 20 years they’ll start reporting that they suspect that maybe Obama wasnt a very good president.
I find it rather depressing that femininity is steadily being replaced by sluttiness.
Frank, please moderate my profoundly important comment on the status of women and men in the modern world.
How many barks for voting “present”?
I am in favor of having the terrorists play football…especially if they are true footballs made from pig skin.
Is PETA onboard with this plan to save the spotted owl? I think that the internal conflict of “we must save the spotted owl…but we can’t kill another creature….but we must save the spotted owl….” should cause some heads there to explode.
So a bird that is native to the ecosystem is pushing aside another native bird? Who cares?
The only birds we should be shooting are house sparrows and European starlings. Rats with wings.
I saw that young female of the species (a true woman would not behave like that) testifying about the lack of contraceptives coverage at Georgetown law. Nancy Pelosi looked like a happy old snake listening to that utter child talk about how Georgetown was so mean to not give her and her friends birth control. It was one of the most revolting things I have ever seen. My goodness, she is at law school and she seems to have no concept of something called the first amendment to the Constitution. Georgetown should be embarrassed to have accepted such a demonstrably stupid person to their institution. My mission in life is to make sure my kids grow up with enough self-respect and respect of others that they will never act like such cry-babies in public. Well, I think my 11 year old could at least explain what the words “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.” Only an overeducated ignoramus like Sandra Fluke could get confused by such plain language.
Thanks, I feel better now.
Were I in college now I would probably demand that the school find someone appealing and pay her to pretend to like me and then sleep with me. Students are idiots and I was one too. But at least I paid for my own recreation .
That would be a tail wag.
“Ed Schultz is on MSNBC complaining about “Bullies.”
People who whine about bullies never had the guts to do something about them.
Just yesterday I was explaining to my daughter that the reason there are no polar bears in Antarctica is because the penguins ate them. Turns out to be possible.
They should have asked the Georgetown woman how many partners she’s had and how many more she plans to have before having children.
When she replies that it’s private or none of our business, ask her why we’re supposed to pay for it, then.
I just saw a commentator say they calculated out the costs and it came out to 3 condoms a day per person. Maybe at BYU…unrelated, anyone see this new movie Badass coming out based of the viral video of epic beard man? Somehow an old white guy getting attacked by a.black guy got turned into a Mexican getting attacked by white shinheads…I love Hollywood
I have a question – are condoms included in this issue of contraception? Or are we just talking the other stuff? I only ask because condoms are what… a buck? Or free lots of places (RAs ALWAYS had condoms outside their doors when I was in school). So if people are still screaming about cost on top of that I’d like to know why they aren’t just using condoms, unless no one is concerned about STDs anymore?
1. I think the women of Georgetown should dump the cheap losers they’re currently dating and get some boyfriends who’ll spring for a pack of rubbers…there, problem solved and at no cost to the taxpayers or to the women. 2. Isn’t this owl thing part of what we used to call the ‘law of natural selection’ and isn’t that a law that shouldn’t be interfered with?
the rules or Thunderdome should apply to owls:
two owls enter, one owl leaves.
do hipster owls “person” when they post pictures on facebook?
I wonder if the five-foot tall penguins were killed off by some long gone pre-historic government agency in order to protect shorter types of penguins from extinction? Naw…who’d do a stupid thing like that?
“It used to be freedom was having access to contraception. Now freedom is forcing someone else to buy contraception for you — which isn’t really freedom at all. Well, less freedom, more loose women.”
-Is anyone here surprised that the Democraps are behind anything that creates more loose women !??(pun intended)..Afetrall, they seem to have used (up) most of the ones available to them !
“Gitmo detainees are getting a $750,000 soccer field.”
-GREAT !! That means any of the detainees not involved in the game will become soccer FANS…who will then crush each other to death when their team wins!! It’s an island, so those muslim funerals will be pretty cost effective too. Genius!
Poor Ms. Sandra has made herself, in more ways than one, too much of an easy target. Didn’t her mother warn her that those bureaucrats won’t respect her in the morning?
If the law says that I have to pay for your birth control, it should also say that you have to put out on the first day.
What’s especially frustrating about this ‘contraception issue/not really a contraception issue but more first amendment issue’ is that it’s so smack-my-head-against-the-wall simple and obvious yet Georgetown scholars don’t get it. Then again, Harvard scholars couldn’t figure out voting procedures in 2000, so whatever. I truly believe this Georgetown law student chick had no clue, and I believe most people in general that opine about this just don’t get it (‘it’ being the point). Now I’m especially bright, so the fact that I get it and so many others don’t is mind blowingly frustrating.
We are given life, liberty, and the PURSUIT of happiness…. not happiness handed to you on a silver platter when you want it, how you want it, with no responsibility or common sense. Sigh.
So what will health care plus government bureaucracy equal?
Mass slaughter of humans, of course, which means that Mitt Romney will survive.
Anticipating a movie remake set in Gitmo: “The Longest Jihad.”
It now appears that Romney and Santorum tied for Michigan delegates.
Maybe we’re looking at this subsidized contraception issue all wrong — in the long run, it might be more economical to make sure these types don’t reproduce.
I ‘early voted’ in Tennessee on Monday.
After all the hoopla in Michigan, Super Tuesday looms on the horizon.
It should be a blast, but I’m guessing no candidate will reach the magic number of 1144 delegates yet.
So the slog continues.
To make it interesting, I play drinking games while watching the returns.
Maybe I’ll take a shot each time I hear the word “unelectable”.
At least that way the word will be good for something!
Can we just point out that most condoms are made with petroleum products now? Apparently Obama’s energy policy will result in less condoms!
Can we declare that punching hippies is medically necessary to reduce blood pressure and require all insurance companies to provide hippies to punch with no co-pay?
http://hopenchangecartoons.blogspot.com/
A prayer for the president.
Oops, sorry. try this.
http://hopenchangecartoons.blogspot.com/2012/02/fully-mental-jack-up.html
Why didn’t I go to Georgetown! Sounds like there are lots of sluts in the Law School! I would have asked one out and offered to pay for the condoms! SCORE!!! I blew it…no I didn’t blow THAT!!! I went to Iowa where we didn’t worry about condoms and such!!!
You know what would make soccer more interesting? Land mines!
“So from out of nowhere this Romney guy comes in to win both Arizona and Michigan primaries.” And there’s a good reason for it. With Santorum appealing only to evangelicals – oh, and Democrats – Mitt is free to rack up votes from everyone one. Values Voters are now finding out the hard way a lesson that African American Democrats have already discovered … http://bit.ly/qVdDUt
The owl thing comes down to one kind of owl is more successful than spotted owls, so the government is going to shoot them. The Obama regime punishes success wherever it finds it!
That’s an interesting theory there ombdz thanx for the post.