President Bush has asked for primetime to give a farewell address to the American people. What’s he’s probably going to do is get the press in the room with him one last time, lock the doors, and totally whale on them in front of live cameras. That’s exactly what Teddy Roosevelt did in his farewell, followed by the statement, “I may leave soon, but these scars should stay with you as a reminder.” It was very touching.
That, sir, would be a wonderful, wonderful thing.
Please, please, O Esteemed Blog Author, grant us one more IMW with Bush/Cheney in the White House!!
“I was told to give a short speech to the American public. You know what you are? You’re nothing but a bunch of cockroaches! You need people like me! You need people like me so you can point your ****ing fingers, and say ‘That’s the bad guy!’ Well, say goodnight to the bad guy! You ain’t never gonna see another bad guy like this around here.”
Wouldn’t work. The girly men would enjoy being whipped, the women would “whale” on each other out of jealously. “Who told you you could wear THAT?!!!”
Wonder if those reporters can duck a thrown shoe with as much agility as Bush!
I would love it if he smacked David Gregory for being such a condescending pompous ass. Then maybe urinate on Helen Thomas just for fun. What a great day that would be, then possibly have John McCain come in and denounce him and all of the other republicans for being meanies.
My favorite farewell so far can be found here at my fav milblog. Dubya says goodbye to his beloved military and they in turn say farewell to him…their beloved CIC. Scroll down about half way and start with “A Single Promise to a Single Soldier”, skip the asshat article and pick up the next two, ” Final Salute- Pres. Says Farewell to the Military” and “The US Military says Farewell to President Bush”
I second the call for another IMW, preferably featuring the return of Chomps.
I third the IMW bit. Chomps could come back in a Labradoodle costume going undercover and biting the Obama girls if they ever mention an interest in going into politics someday as a sort of reverse Pavlovian exercise (dogs train people by association).
When some woman asked him if NOW he could think of a mistake, he should have said, “Yeah, calling on you for a question, ya stupid b***h” and moved on.
I think that’s when he’ll officially shred the Constitution and declare himself
EmperorChimperor for Life.-Assuming, of course, that the DUmmies and Kos kids aren’t a bunch of lying weenies delusional from 8 years of BDS.
Let it be known that I have conquered the Bailout game that I saw linked at Hot Air, for the honour of IMAO!
As the top score-holder, I hereby offer my services as a financial expert via e-mail at the reasonable rate of $1,000,000 per character. Yes, spaces, punctuation, and hidden characters count, and I am quite verbose, so have your off-shore account numbers at the ready.
Oops. And I charge for bad HTML, as well.
As the press is seated, and the announcement is made for the entrance of President Bush, Dick Cheney drives into the room on a forklift, bearing the load of a 55 gallon drum of gasoline. Cheney dismounts the forklift, and kicks over the barrel of gasoline, flooding the floor of the press room. As the press begins to question Cheney’s action, Cheney yells out, “You kept telling the public that our war in Iraq was a war for oil, so I thought I’d give you some of it!” Before the press can utter another word, Cheney whips out a shotgun that was mounted behind the seat of the forklift, and proceeds to shoot every member of the press in the face. Bush calmly steps up to the podium, and just in the manor of the clip that the libtards love to show, flips the press “the bird”. Bush strikes a match against the podium, and tosses it into the gasoline.
Sorry, folks…it’s late, I just got home from work, but just in case Frank doesn’t write one last IMW, I thought I give you my own delightfully twisted version.
You are partly right.
Cheney enter the room with a riot gun and four boxes of buckshot, announcing, “I’m hunting quail.”
Ann Coulter had the right idea, bless her!
“If Bush wanted to have fun, just before leaving office he would have signed executive orders reinstating the ‘wall’ between the FBI and the CIA, banning waterboarding, ending terrorist surveillance, prohibiting extraordinary rendition, and shutting down Guantanamo. After he defied all predictions by keeping America terrorist-free for eight years, let’s see Obama do it without having to explain to the New York Times why he’s ‘tearing up the Constitution’.”
– Guilty, Ann Coulter, 2008. (30% off at Borders!)