Government-run health care killed the dinosaurs.
The Confederacy was not all about slavery the same way Ted Kennedy was not all about drowning a woman in a river.
Democrats wondering why Tea Party members are angry are a like a guy who shook a cat wondering why it’s angry.
BTW, the reason the shaken cat is angry is because the president is black.
Apparently I missed the breaking news of a man smoking in an airplane bathroom. I hope it brought us together as a nation.
If arresting someone for smoking in public is what it takes for liberals to finally take the War on Terror seriously, then I’m all for it.
I’m sure we are all concerned about ignorant people targeting law abiding smokers for retribution. Most smokers in America are peaceable, god-fearing people who only want to live their lives like anyone else – just a little smokier. I’m afraid that this incident and media hype will cause innocent smokers to be singled out for some type of reprisal.
DamnCat, you are full of it! Full of it! If their smoking was peaceful, then the manifesto written by the prophet John Rolfe wouldn’t have incited them to violence against non-smokers!
Well, apparently, jets were scrambled over the bathroom smoker. Clearly, this incident called for an advanced, anti-tobacco missile. ~Jimmy from Clarksville, TN.
RT
-Old phrase: “To be ruled by evil men is the price good men pay for political indifference.”
-Modern Liberalism could also be called sardine fever, the more crowded the neighborhood the more liberal the people. Give people some space and their own terri-single moms and childless parents
Liberal mind:
-drill holes in the heads of halfborn babies but dont drills holes in the earth (HT S.O.B.)
-pro choice feminists can call US soldiers baby killers
-unproductive members of society get checks every month
-productive members of society gets half their check taken every month
-Foreign poor religious people should be worshipped and protected,
-Domestic poor religious people should be degraded and attacked.
The civil war was about slavery the way Iraq was about W.M.D..
Boy that was mess. Sorry for the typo on “5” (shouldn’t type when I am in a hurry)
correction:
-Give people some space and their own territory and the large majority will become conservative.
belonged under the “Liberal Mind” part.
-single moms and childless parents
I’m glad somebody is blowing the lid of the real reason dinosaurs were killed. It started when they foolishly elected Obamasuarus Rex and his wife, Wookiesaurus Fatbuttus. They got working on government run healthcare instead of building up their defenses against the evil Asteroid Union of Flying Space Rocks, or the AUFSR. The AUFSR noted with glee that defense was no longer a priority of the United States of Dinosauria and devised a plan by which they could smash an asteroid into the US of D and install their allies, birds, as rulers of Earth and fullfill their long standing ambition of covering all windshields on Earth with bird crap. The rest, as they say, is history.
Marco, you intolerant fascist! Think of all the great smokers of history – Sir Walter Raleigh, Prince Albert, John Wayne(!) – who you would paint with the same broad brush as this reprehensible toilet smoker.
It’s people like you who give non-smokers a bad name!
Would the dinosaurs in question be the cool, lizard-skin dinosaurs or the gay, feathered dinosaurs. Cuz if it’s the latter I’m ok with that. Dinosaurs should be cook, dammit. If I wanted to see the All Male Dinosaur Revue I’d go to San Francisco.
D’oh. Dinosaurs should be cool dammit. And maybe cooked, too. Would they taste like chicken or do chickens taste like dinosaurs?
“Apparently I missed the breaking news of a man smoking in an airplane bathroom. I hope it brought us together as a nation.”
I hereby proclaim that IMAO.COM is a sovereign country. Under our president, Frank J., we will exercise our rights to choose our diplomats. Effective immediately, MarkoMancuso, DamnCat, Stephen, Jimmy Shiggz, Proud Infidel and myself are to be considered diplomats to the glorious homeland of IMAO. We will be adding several more diplomats as well. Now that we are diplomats, American laws mean nothing to us, as we have diplomatic immunity.
Smoke ’em if ya got ’em!
This is outstanding, Son of Bob! I feel, however, that our embassy should be established somewhere other than Frank J.’s garage.
I agree, Marco. But SarahK won’t let us smoke in the house – “bad for the baby” or some such excuse.
Well, we could build a treehouse in his backyard. That sounds fun!
No girls or babies allowed!
Except for seanmahair. She says she’s a grandmother, so maybe she can bake cookies for us!
Thanks, Son of Bob, nobody ever made me a diplomat before. And I’m honored to be associated with such a fine group of diplomats. Kinda takes the sting out of not being able to understand the Girding For Dummies book. And did Marko mention fresh baked cookies? Man, the perks for being a diplomat are SWEET!
Anybody got a Diplomacy For Dummies book I can borrow?
If I were Secretary of State for Franklandia, my first act would be to point out that Franklandia is a Muslim nation that has been forcefully oppressed by Christian nations since the time of the Crusades. This would provide two beneficial effects:
1) Obama would spend a lot of time apologizing to us.
2) We would spend a lot of time laughing at Obama for apologizing to us. (See Agmapajamahead’s recent response to Obama’s latest peace foray.)
I will be Secretary of WAR. Our military will rely on the submarine, the submersible dinosaur, the vampire bat, and the Franklandia Marine Corps.
Marko, you’re a natural for Secretary of War. Submersible dinosaur? Brilliant! I just can’t until those big puppies with the IMAO logo to start surfacing off the coast of Iran. Unfair, Unbalanced, Unmedicated. YAY!
“Don’t run, Ahmanutjob! You’ll just die tired…”
After they’re done in Iran, we send them to D.C. next!
Since seanmahair will be our on female she should be Secretary of the Interior. She can pick out curtains & stuff – girls are good at that. She can also fill up our interiors with tasty cookies!
No girls or babies allowed? Fine. I don’t want to play with you stupid boys anyway. And you can forget about getting any cookies from me. And I’m taking all the bacon too. And the handknit lightsaber I just made.
So there.
KnitterChick,
Don’t listen to DamnCat, we like girls and babies just fine. So, can a get one of those handknitted light sabers? Pretty please?
Awww…gee whiz – TWO girls?
Now we’re all going to have to listen to long discussions about whose hair looked stupid on American Idol last night! Criminey!
KnitterChick can be Secretary of Housing. As in she can look really cute as she asks Mommy to get Daddy to put an HD television in our playhouse.
She can make cookies too!
Proud Infidel – I always knew I liked you. I’ll set aside a lightsaber for you. Would you like a side of bacon with that?
DamnCat – I don’t care much about American Idol, but we could go get a mani-pedi and talk about Brangelina. Anyway, you’re probably going to have to deal with more than two girls – what about SarahK?
Who is going to be in charge of distributing the laser-eyed dinosaurs? Do we each get our own or what?
Aww. fer cryin’ out load – we’ll never hear the end of American Idol talk now!
You mean there is an entire blog out there devoted to talking about teevee? What the hell am I doing here? I need to go talk some smack about those Real Housewives.
Marco – what is UP with all this cookie talk? You guys are completely capable of making your own cookies. You can do it. I believe in you. The oven is that big box in that room with the beer.
We only use grills, KnitterChick! Gas grills, charcoal grills, nuclear powered grills, etc.
Chromed car grills, etc.
Diplomatic immunity would be awesome and probably necessary. If we are going to use Franks garage get that rabid coon out from the ceiling first. They are not like polar bears or Islamic terrorists who really just want to laugh, play, and hug.
I can add it to my immunity on (30rocks) Milf-Island! Also I have had an open-ended grammar immunity since I caught my third grade teacher smoking weed during recess. Sure I got an A that year without doing anything but, I got failed teh grammar to this very day.
Can we start having a running thing of pictures or laws or whatever of what Franks country should be like? If so here is my two submissions for the Flag: NSFW
http://wiijzeman.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/pamela-stephenson-oops.jpg
The smoker on the plane joked that he wasn’t smoking in the john, he was just trying to light the fuse in his shoes.
They had to let him go because he was a diplomat from some sandpit called Katar, Cat-Tar, sQuater, Whatever. (On a diplomatic mission to see a confessed teritz, no less).
At the start of each flight, stewardesses should ask in advance for volunteer ‘Designated-Tacklers’ to take down disruptive scumbags who dare to cause trouble while the plane is in motion because you can’t always find a heroic Dutchman when you need one.
They Did have an Air-Marshal on the flight and I’m sure he did a very professional job, but a small squad of volunteer POAs (P*ssed-Off Americans) could have really wiped the fer’iner smirk off his face. “Oh, gee, sorry dude, I didn’t know arms could bend that way!”
If I bring beer, can I be a diplomat too?
Can I be the Trade Ambassador to Asscrackistan? ……. I also need to be Acting Director of the following;
FDA
DEA
Customs
Oh…and I need to be the Sole Judge on your “Supreme Court.”
Dont ask any questions… just know that with those diplomatic immunity pouches….. I can make you rich
Now that all of you are ambassadors does this mean you can smoke with impunity on airplanes?
Thanks, KnitterChick. Yes, some bacon with that hand knitted lightsaber would be great. Is there a website I can direct my wife to so she can learn about making handknitted lightsabers?
DamnCat, remember, handknitted lightsabers. With bacon. Just think how cool those submersible dinosaurs are gonna look with lightsabers.
zzyzx, you know several ambassadorships are still open. You may be our next ambassador to the country of Hollywood. It’s a pretty easy position, because none of us really care what any of them actually think, so you would be free to smoke in Sean Penn’s bathroom, then when he tried to have you removed from his house you could claim diplomatic immunity before punching him in his monkey face.
Outstanding Son of Bob count me in…….z
…Suppose he was smoking filter- tipped Farragamos or Char-Cole Haans?