So South Korea, as punishment to North Korea for sinking one of their ships, is now broadcasting propaganda at the North Korean border. That’s got to be a hard job to explain to North Koreans exactly how much their country sucks. To tell them the frank truth is going to sound like an exaggeration, and no one is going to believe it.
“Even all of Africa is better off than you guys.”
“It’s not normal to have a weird little pot-bellied, poofy-haired leader.”
“As for the capitalistic countries Kim Jong Il denounces, guess what they have: Fat poor people.”
“Have you guys even heard of the iPad?”
North Korea is a lot like that Twilight Zone episode where a little all-powerful kid runs a town, and everyone has to pretend all the crappy things he does are good so they don’t get sent to a cornfield. It’s kinda insulting we share the same planet with it.
Rap music played 24/7 should do the trick. Ought to bring them down to their knees.
Send them Bret Michaels — he can do his Celebrity Apprentice gig there. That oughta do ’em in.
“Hellloooo silly North Korean type peoples. Sink another one of our ships, and I shall taunt you a third time!”
It is my understanding that the left in education,media, government, etc.. in South Korea pushes a pretty strong narrative of North Korea as the oppressed victim of America. Pretty much it is Asian Mexico.
I have no doubt you’re right, shiggz. The thing is, the South Koreans would likely be afraid to even aim loudspeakers at North Korea if were it not for US troops on the peninsula. Given the whining that the South has been doing about us, mebbe we should scoot. They seem to have the situation completely in hand and we could bring those troops home.
“Marx said you guys were ‘The radical right wing teabaggers of the communist movement.'”
“As for the capitalistic countries Kim Jong Il denounces, guess what they have: Fat poor people.”
A+
Tell them they are lower than Yemen, Botswana, and New Jersey. That’ll fry their shorts. And sic Kagan with her wide stance. Suerrender in no time.
Surrender
Kim Jong Il : No kids came over to play today, not a single one, and I wanted someone to play with!
Kim Il-sung : Well, Kim Jong Il , you remember what happened the last time some kids came over to play. The little Yang boy and his sister.
Kim Jong Il : I had a real good time.
Kim Il-sung: Oh, sure you did, you had a real good time, and it’s good that you had a good time, it’s real good. It’s just that…
Kim Jong Il : It’s just that what?
Kim Il-sung : …Well, Kim Jong Il , you, uh… you wished them away into the ricefield, and their mommy and daddy got real upset.
“Hey North Koreans! We’re having a barbeque, can you smell it? Oh wow, we’ve got SO MUCH food over here, and it all looks SO delicious! Why yes, thank you, I will have a third helping of everything! Mm-mmm… it tastes SO GOOD! What? What’ll we do with all the left-overs? What do I care? We can just throw it out and cook some more tomorrow, ’cause we’ve just got SO MUCH food!”
Three words: MTV’s Real World.
Play ’em all, every season.
Say what you will about Communism but they save a fortune on electricity.
http://chicagoboyz.net/wp-content/uploads/korea_lights_lg.jpg
That single light in NK must be Kim Jong Il’s porch light.