- … that when street-corner protesters hold up their signs from exactly 11:00 to exactly 1:00 and then go home, it is no mere coincidence. They are being paid.
- … some liberal group, somewhere, gets residuals every time the “B” in “Black” is upper-case. Capitalization is key in a market economy!
- … women secretly lust after me.

The people with the strongest opinions have the least evidence to support those opinions.
Prive it!
…that escort could break a $20 bill, but was just hoping for a tip.
$20!? Who are you, a Rockefeller?
…that Captain Louis Renault wasn’t shocked at all by gambling going on at Rick’s Café Americain…
I Can’t Prove It, But I Suspect…
…the Emu.
I Can’t Prove It, But I Suspect…
…our FBI monitor knows where my shillelagh is.