Which is April 18th this year, even though April 15th falls on a weekday.
The reason why is governmentally retarded. You don’t want to know.
Anyway, Dangerously Fanatical IMAO Reader Laurie set down her Holy Book (The Chronicles of Dubya) long enough to pen a little poem. It’s to the tune of Dion’s “The Wanderer”.
To make this easier to enjoy, he’s the karaoke version of the song, followed by Laurie’s lyrics:
Oh well I’m politician who will never pay it down,
Where tax money is found well then you know that I’m around
I tax ’em and I spend ’em cause it all belongs to me
I seize ’em and I tax ’em cause tax money is for free
They call me the squanderer, yeah I’m a squanderer,
I tax and spend and spend and spend and spend
Well there’s Obama on my left and Crats upon my right,
And Nancy is the girl well that I’ll caucus with tonight,
And when the People ask me to just stop my spending ways,
I tear open my tax code and show them the taxing maze,
‘Cause I’m a squanderer, yeah I’m a squanderer
I tax and spend and spend and spend and spend
Well I tax from town to nation,
I go through life without a care,
And I’m as happy as a clown,
I’ll spend on nonsense everywhere.
Yeah I’m the type of guy that likes to tax and spend
I’ll never turn down taxes ‘cause for taxes there’s no end!
And when I find myself fallin’ for some new spending dream
I allocate my budget and spend on some global scheme
And I’m a squanderer, yeah I’m a squanderer
I tax and spend and spend and spend and spend
Yeah I’m the type of guy that likes to tax and spend
I’ll never turn down taxes ‘cause for taxes there’s no end!
And when I find myself fallin’ for some new spending dream
I allocate my budget and spend on some global scheme
Cause I’m a squanderer, yeah a squanderer
I tax and spend and spend and spend and spend
Cause I’m a squanderer, yeah a squanderer
I tax and spend and spend and spend and spend
I give it a ten Dick…it’s got a good beat and you can dance to it.
Great job Laurie. zzyzx, yeah, but it’s one of those They Shoot Horses Don’t They kinds of dance.
I hate poetry!
Why don’t those worthless, unionzed crackers (I just know white people are behind this!!!) just re-write history every year so that every holiday can fall on a weekday and they can waste more time?
Nice submission, Laurie. I tried singing your lyrics to the song – yeah, at 06:30 on a Saturday morning! Coffee!
“Dangerously Fanatical IMAO Reader Laurie” – odd, I don’t see her name pop-up in the comments, Harvey. Do we have to guess what her pen name is?
Ooooh. Ooooh. A weekend mystery!
@Jimmy,
Her pen name is “Frank J.”
Hi and thanks for the kind words. It was actually me who penned it. I am not Frank J. : ) Really.
It would be really fantastic if one of you talented IMAO guys would sing this and make a you tube of it!
I don’t know how to do that. If it catches on you could be famously patriotic!
Or you could sing it at a rally. Can’t you just hear the crowd joining in on the chorus “tax and spend and spend and spend and spend?” It would be wonderful!
Rock the ‘crats world!!!
Also, feel free to edit it to suit whatever version of the background music you have. They seem to vary with source. Harvey might even publish the link to you!
Well, SOB, I rather suspect –now– that “helpful researcher” (Laurie) is on Frank and Harvey’s super secret staff!
By the way, looking for well-written piece on the state of things? Go here:
http://seanmahair.wordpress.com/2011/04/07/goodbye-my-friend/
Yeah, seanmahair… it’s time you publish!
Since I’m a frequent commenter here, let me state up-front that when you start making huge jing on this little diddy, I expect my cut! Now that we have that cleared up, that is all…
ussjimmycarter,
The only one who might make $$ off of this would be the musically talented guy or group who steps up and sings it for a youtube.
They could be famous! Sarah Palin might even headline with them at a rally!! Think of the cool possibilities!!!
Laurie,
I like it. I like it lots. However, I am curious to know what you all plan to do if we don’t tax and spend. I mean, you approve of this poem that makes tax and spend seem negative. If we don’t tax and spend, how do you propose to win the future?!!!!
You win the future by buying the present and rewriting the past. Besides, when the government controls everything we are really taxing our benevolent overlords when we demand to be taken care of. We won’t have to worry about who pays their fair share, but selfishly demand the state feed, clothe and house us. Michelle wins when our tapeworms move to Somalia to get a good meal. Barry wins when our ration coupons are printed on wider paper so his ears fit into his picture that is printed on them.