At a recent campaign event, Joe Biden said about Republicans, “They’re going to put y’all back in chains.” But that wasn’t the only dumb thing Biden said at that rally. Here are some other statements from him at the same event:
“Anyone seen my hands? Oh wait; they’re in my pockets. False alarm.”
“The Republicans are worse than Adolph Lundgren Hitler.”
“Frankly I think we have plenty of jobs. I mean, look at me, I have one. I think I’m doing okay at it, but I don’t really understand it.”
“They said I’m dumb. Me dumb? Who say such thing?”
“Did you know Romney once strapped a dog to the roof of his car? I’d never do that. I once let my dog drive the car. At least that’s what I told the police when I crashed into a goalpost at the football stadium.”
“Look at me! I can speak Chinese! Chee chong choo choo!”
“My pants fell down again. What did I do with my belt?”
“Don’t look at the sun; that makes it angry. That’s how we get global warming.”
“Harry Reid is a great guy. I don’t let him touch me, though, because he’s creepy. I heard on the internet something about him and kids…”
“The Republicans want to keep Sandra Fluke from getting contraception. That’s horrible. I mean, I met her, and she’s a real weirdo. We don’t want her reproducing.”
“You ever seen that Chris Matthews on TV? That guy is like a genius.”
“I am literally — literally — vomiting in terror over the though of Paul Ryan becoming Vice President. Where am I going to live if that happens? Delaware says I’m not allowed to come back.”
“You think you’re smart, eh? Well, let me tell you about smart, son. See that thermometer over there? That’s my IQ, bud.”
“Mr. Biden, it says 45°C.”
“Hold on, smart ass. Let me find my glasses.”
“Well, converting to Fahrenheit, that’s 162!! That’s about right!”
“No, and that’s 113°F, sir. And you’re not even close to that.”
“The Republicans want to keep Sandra Fluke from getting contraception. That’s horrible. I mean, I met her, and she’s a real weirdo. We don’t want her reproducing.” this may be the smartest thing he has said. We DON’T want her reproducing….well that could hold true of most liberals….I may need to rethink my position on this whole contraception thing, at least as applied to liberals.
Who among us hasn’t stuck a paperclip into an electrical outlet to see what will happen? That’s what I’m talking about.
“I wanna tell you kids, I’m down with the you…I’m hip to where it’s at, man…why just the other day I was telling Sir Paul McCartney and his little drummer, Yassir Arafat, how much I dug the Beatles and asked them when they might reunite with George and John and record some new stuff…I mean, that’s the sound of today, right, kids?”
We need to be green, we need to help save Mother Earth. I mean, we gotta do things, even simple things like using recycled garbage bags. I tell ya, I don’t know how they clean them up so well and pack ’em back into the box but it’s amazing!
Gunga galunga… gunga, gunga-lagunga
Well, guys and girls, me and Barack, we really support all you vegetarians and vegans and whatnot! Have y’all tried the veal here? It’s great!
@rodney dill: …so I got that goin’ for me.
With all these gaffes, it’s really amazing how Biden hasn’t been Dan Quayled yet.
Silly rabbit! He’s a DEMOCRAT!
A little lead paint never hurt anyone was what my father taught me. Hey kid, you gonna finish that window sill?