… HIM: Not a big fan of keeping your elbows off the table, though?
… HIM: Like in Doctor McCoy’s sick bay? Did you ever notice in Episode 12 of The Original Series, he . . .
… HIM: That’s your idea of small talk? I say “This looks like a nice restaurant,” and you say “I’m a huge supporter of universal health care”? Where do we go from here?
… HIM: That’s not a rolled-up napkin. You’ve just been served with a restraining order.
… HIM: What’s this, the Great Wall of Table Settings? I can barely see your cleavage over all this sh**.
… HIM: Could they seat us any closer to the tree? Just keep brushing the pine needles off the table. I guess that crumpled One I slipped into the maitre d’s hand wasn’t enough.
Battle of Whites, battle of Reds
Perhaps a battle of morés instead
We’ll get a table near the tree
In our old familiar place
You and I, face to face . . .
A battle of Reds, a battle of Whites
I blame it on the dating app tonight
But I’ll meet you any time you want
In an egalitarian restaurant
…
Things are okay in USA these days
Got some good jobs, got some high office
Got less strife, got new life
And the First Family’s fine
We lost Dutch long ago
You lost the House
I did not know
You could ever look so nuts
After so little time.
You remember those days hanging out
As a Village queen
Engineer boots, leather jackets
And tight blue jeans
Oh, dropped a dime on the hoax
The media sang about New Orleans
Looting cold beer, in spotlights
Those panchromatic pillage nights.
Barry and Michelle were popular officials
And the king and the queen of the prom
Riding around with their spy ops on
Like a rodeo clown
Nobody looked any deeper
Or was willing to sell out their party cheaper
We never knew Dems could want even less out of life
Surely bending-the-rulers would always know how to survive.
Barry and Michelle were still going steady
In the summer of 2016
When they decided their successor should be
The falling queen
Everyone said they were crazy
“Barry you know that she’s much too lazy
And the USA could never afford to live that kind of life.”
Oh but there we were waving Barry and Michelle goodbye.
Well, they got an arrangement with deep state puppets
And a couple of plantings from Soros
A big wad of cash that they got from the stash
They had saved in a bank on Comoros
But they started their flight when the money got tight
And they just couldn’t count on tomorrows
Her: I am a huge supporter of Universal Health Care.
Him: I’m more of a Coventry City supporter.
Her: You support Sanctuary Cities?
Him: Uh, You know, the Blues.
Her: Yes, I hear you. I hate those durn deplorable Reds myself.
Him: Errr. We are talking football, aren’t we?
Her: Football? Oh yes! That Kaepernick guy is great! I love the way he sticks it to Trump when he kneels!
Him: I think we have a communication problem, let me explain…
Her: You want to MANSPLAIN SOMETHING TO ME? HOW DARE YOU! What could you be thinking?
Him: Thinking? I am thinking about where the fire exits are in this place. I hope they are near the Men’s Room.
Her: MEN”S ROOM?!? Are you being Cisgendered?
Him: Nope, I’m being Disappeared-gendered. Bye!
Her: Damn. Why can’t I get through a date? Waiter, another glass of wine..
Waiter: Yes Ma’am.
Her: Ma’am? Did you just assume my gender?
Waiter: Sorry, please excuse me I need to find the bathroom myself.
I would have gone with giving her the bill to pay. And the bill from the table next to you, and the table next to that, and the table next to that…
… HIM: Not a big fan of keeping your elbows off the table, though?
… HIM: Like in Doctor McCoy’s sick bay? Did you ever notice in Episode 12 of The Original Series, he . . .
… HIM: That’s your idea of small talk? I say “This looks like a nice restaurant,” and you say “I’m a huge supporter of universal health care”? Where do we go from here?
… HIM: That’s not a rolled-up napkin. You’ve just been served with a restraining order.
… HIM: What’s this, the Great Wall of Table Settings? I can barely see your cleavage over all this sh**.
… HIM: Could they seat us any closer to the tree? Just keep brushing the pine needles off the table. I guess that crumpled One I slipped into the maitre d’s hand wasn’t enough.
… HIM: Let me tell you a story about a little kid named Alfie Evans.
Scenes From An SJW Restaurant
.
Battle of Whites, battle of Reds
Perhaps a battle of morés instead
We’ll get a table near the tree
In our old familiar place
You and I, face to face . . .
A battle of Reds, a battle of Whites
I blame it on the dating app tonight
But I’ll meet you any time you want
In an egalitarian restaurant
…
Things are okay in USA these days
Got some good jobs, got some high office
Got less strife, got new life
And the First Family’s fine
We lost Dutch long ago
You lost the House
I did not know
You could ever look so nuts
After so little time.
You remember those days hanging out
As a Village queen
Engineer boots, leather jackets
And tight blue jeans
Oh, dropped a dime on the hoax
The media sang about New Orleans
Looting cold beer, in spotlights
Those panchromatic pillage nights.
Barry and Michelle were popular officials
And the king and the queen of the prom
Riding around with their spy ops on
Like a rodeo clown
Nobody looked any deeper
Or was willing to sell out their party cheaper
We never knew Dems could want even less out of life
Surely bending-the-rulers would always know how to survive.
Barry and Michelle were still going steady
In the summer of 2016
When they decided their successor should be
The falling queen
Everyone said they were crazy
“Barry you know that she’s much too lazy
And the USA could never afford to live that kind of life.”
Oh but there we were waving Barry and Michelle goodbye.
Well, they got an arrangement with deep state puppets
And a couple of plantings from Soros
A big wad of cash that they got from the stash
They had saved in a bank on Comoros
But they started their flight when the money got tight
And they just couldn’t count on tomorrows
Yeah, rock and roll!
Her: I am a huge supporter of Universal Health Care.
Him: I’m more of a Coventry City supporter.
Her: You support Sanctuary Cities?
Him: Uh, You know, the Blues.
Her: Yes, I hear you. I hate those durn deplorable Reds myself.
Him: Errr. We are talking football, aren’t we?
Her: Football? Oh yes! That Kaepernick guy is great! I love the way he sticks it to Trump when he kneels!
Him: I think we have a communication problem, let me explain…
Her: You want to MANSPLAIN SOMETHING TO ME? HOW DARE YOU! What could you be thinking?
Him: Thinking? I am thinking about where the fire exits are in this place. I hope they are near the Men’s Room.
Her: MEN”S ROOM?!? Are you being Cisgendered?
Him: Nope, I’m being Disappeared-gendered. Bye!
Her: Damn. Why can’t I get through a date? Waiter, another glass of wine..
Waiter: Yes Ma’am.
Her: Ma’am? Did you just assume my gender?
Waiter: Sorry, please excuse me I need to find the bathroom myself.
Observer:
“I’m not surprised you didn’t get that. It is in fact a trick question. Coventry City have never won the English Football Cup.”
True when Python did their skit but Coventry City has now one championship cup under their belt. 1986/87.
The gods of “football” trivia have waited in ambush for me!
It was a long wait.