Ruminating on his presidential run during a Vanity Fair interview, Beto O’Rourke said “I’m just born to do this“.
Running at the head of a party where “just born” is the tricky part.
Ruminating on his presidential run during a Vanity Fair interview, Beto O’Rourke said “I’m just born to do this“.
Running at the head of a party where “just born” is the tricky part.
Beto, disguised as a Democrat, describes his qualifications as a Presidential contender….
Beto: Voted no on HR 6784 – Manage our Wolves Act!
DNC Chairman: That’s not much of a qualification.
Beto: Also voted no on HR 6760 – Protecting Family and Small Business Tax Cuts Act of 2018!
DNC Chairman: [smiling] Kinkyyyy. Sign here.
DNC Chairman: Qualifications?
Beto: Tax, spend, investigate Trump, and tax.
DNC Chairman: You said tax twice.
Beto: I like tax.
Okay, Oppo, we need a “Born to Run” send-up.
♫
Any day he’s going down in defeat running down the American Dream
At night he resides in a mansion and glories in liberal limousines
Sprung from pages of Vogue and Time, well-heeled, well-protected, yet stumbling over his lines
Whoa-ooh
Bobby, remember don’t give Clintons crap, it’s a death trap
It’s a suicide rap, you’ll die of old age while you’re young
Trump’s unliked by us, and Bobby you were born to run
Indies, let me run, I wanna be your friend, I wanna nurse this bland ambition
Just wrap your minds ’round a new Camelot, Dems, and slap down phony Injuns.
Together I could break from the pack, I’ll run till I’m dropped, “to spend time giving back”
Whooah,
Won’t you watch me preachin’ to the choir?
‘Cause baby I’m just a nice-haired skateboard rider, I’m gonna know how Edwards feels
I want to know if Biden’s filed — man, I wish I’d come up with a Green New Deal!
Oh, can you Trudeau me . . . ?
♫
Beyond my palace semi-empowered drones scream down all opposition
The girls comb their hair in their armpit mirrors and the boys try to look conditioned
The refusnik part is so fun to play, kids are huddled in safe spaces, not missed
I wanna cry with you pusscake in the street tonight, over your everlasting GIFs
Huh!
One, two, three, four!
The Dem field is jammed with token heroes on a last chance power drive
Everybody’s going to run in 2020, but they’re all on the same side
On Super Tuesday we can live with the sadness, I’ll vote with all the madness in my soul
Whoah,
Some gay girl, I don’t know when
Is gonna get to that place where we really want to go and cave to Kim Jong-Un
But till then
Trump’s in the White House, so baby we were born to run
Ah, money!
Trump’s not like us, baby we were born to run
Come on Gen Z,
Trump’s not like us, baby here’s my platform:
Whoah whoah whoah-whoah
Hmm hmm hmm-hmm
Oh-oh oh whoah whoah whoah-whoah
Whoah oh oh oh whoah
Hmm hmm hmm-hmm
Whoah whoah whoah-whoah
Whoah whoah whoah-whoah
Whoah oh oh oh whoah
I knew you could.
https://i.imgflip.com/t72qh.jpg
♪
There’s a bland man with a bland dog livin’ in a grand neighborhood
He got somewhat more interesting runnin’ for the whole nine yards
You know he thinks that we’ve got it too good
There’s a rich woman in the background, talk about fantastic luck!
And he looks at her and says, “Hey darlin’, I can remember when
You bought me that truck! ”
Oh but ain’t that America for you and me?
Ain’t that America for the DNC?
Disdain America home of the free
Liberal pink causes for you and me
There’s a young man down in Texas
With rock ‘n’ roll political aspirations
He’s got TV hair, TV smile
He says, “Lord this must be one desperate nation!”
‘Cause they told me to act younger
“Boy you’re gonna be president.”
But just like everything else that crazy Betomania
Just kinda came and went.
Oh but ain’t that a miracle for you and me?
Ain’t that a miracle for the DNC?
Disdain America home of the free
Liberal pink causes for you and me
Well there are legals, and illegals
How do we know, know, know?
Go to work in some high rise
And live down south in Mexico
Ooh yeah
And there’s whiners and there’s losers
But they ain’t no big deal
‘Cause the simple fact baby isn’t moats,
Or boats,
But who counts the votes.
Oh ain’t that America for you and me?
Ain’t that America for the DNC?
Disdain America home of the free
Liberal pink causes for you and me
♪
I would tee up Bedo Shuffle by Boz Scaggs, but I’ve used up my supply of “Whoa”s.
Ladies and Gentlemen, The Who:
♫
Beto tries to put us down
Just because it s – sounds profound
They things he does look all controlled
Know he watches how it p – polled
Talk about MAGA generation . . .
♫
♫
He’s unreal
Newer brand
Living in his
Neverland
Making all his nowhere plans
For nobodies.
He’s as primed
As he can be
Just see what
Pelosi sees
Newer Man
Can you
Seem real
At all?
♫
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