Yeah, I know, it’s not right to laugh about a virus that will kill us all before the week is out. But we don’t care.
I’ll start with a comment that was left yesterday:
All countries are getting the corona virus now. But China got it right off the bat.
Damn Cat
So, now’s your turn. Leave your best sick joke (get it?) in the comments.
So, a line of old folks is qued up outside the grocery store doors waiting for the special senior hour for shopping first thing in the morning. A young 18 year old cuts to the front of the line but an old lady whacks him In the gut with her purse, bowling him over. The same kid tries to cut line again when an old geezer in a wheelchair bonks him over the head with his cane. Finally, the kid tries to rush to the front of the line when 3 old ladies threaten to hurl a line of shopping carts at him. The kid stops short & says, look, you old farts, I know you wanna get in to grab your toilet paper, sanitizer & all the rest but nobody’s gettin’ NUTHIN’ if you don’t let me up here to unlock the damn door first!!
Why does a guy in a wheelchair need a cane?
For knocking Walruses that ask silly questions in the head.
Thankfully those don’t exist.
For beating hippies. Punching hurts when you have arthritis.
Wu, Han, and Flu, the Siamese triplets, walk into a bar. The bartender says you’ll have to sit six feet apart.
I think I’m in love with the Wuhan virus.
It really took my breath away.
Congress passed the stimulus bill.
Winner: Joke of the Day
Second Winner: Joke of the Day
Winner: Sick Joke of the Day
FIFY
My Family was having a small gathering at my Daughters home. She’s a Nurse, so I called her to ask what I could do to protect myself, since I’m over 60? She told me to wear gloves and a mask. When I got there I found everyone else was wearing clothes!
Pity everyone had to keep 6 feet away.
Hillary Clinton
Why is there a toilet paper shortage during the coronavirus epidemic?
Because every time someone sneezes 6 people crap themselves.