Song Parody: Self-Quarantine Forever

Self-Quarantine Forever

♩♩♪

Should we let it take Hugh Downs?
‘Cause it’s going to.
That’s how it feels:
Nothing is real.
And nothing but Wuhan about.
Self-quarantine feels forever.

Living is queasy, as we know,
Misunderstanding Wikipedia.
It’s letting them hoard T.P., Ah yes,
But it all works out:
It doesn’t matter much to the media.

Will it take Hugh Downs?
You know it’s going to.
That’s how it feels:
Nothing is real.
And nothing but Wuhan about
Self-quarantine feels forever.

No one I know has high fever
I mean, it must be high or low.
That is, what won’t do them in
Is all right
That is, I think, it’s not too bad.

Let us take Hugh Downs —
‘Cause it’s going to.
That’s how it feels.
“Statistics are real.”
And nothing but Wuhan’s about
Self-quarantine feels forever.

Always know sometimes
What you know is just in Dems’ dreams:
“Trump thinks … er, no, I mean, — er, yes …
But it’s all wrong —
That is, I think I disagree.”

So it’ll take Hugh Downs?
Yes, it’s going to.
That’s how it feels:
Nothing is real.
And nothing but Wuhan about.

 

So:

Self-quarantine forever.
Self-quarantine forever.
Self-quarantine forever.

♩♩♪

Saturday Night Hootenanny

Welcome Brothers and Sisters to the first weekly IMAO Saturday Night Hootenanny.

For your listen pleasure we have some acts that you may have never seen before and  even some classics.

Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Buy those Chinese Flu war bonds!

IMAO Time Machine: IMAO Podcast #23 10-02-06

  1. Introduction
  2. Harvey: Fun Facts About Michigan Part 1
  3. Sarah K: Target Practice
  4. Harvey: Fun Facts About Michigan Part 2
  5. American Monkey with Spacemonkey: Chris Wallace’s Bill Clinton interview
  6. Sarah K: Post-election blues
  7. World of Knowledge with FrankJ: Oil
  8. Laurence Simon’s Crappy Bedtime Story: Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
  9. Sarah K reviews “Smallville”
  10. FrankJ: What if Democrats win in 2006?
  11. Conclusion

Song Parody: Covid-19 Nervous Breakdown

(Sung to the tune of the Rolling Stones’ “19th Nervous Breakdown” — but I hope it wasn’t necessary to say that.)

Covid-19 Nervous Breakdown

♩♩♪

You’re the kind of person you meet at certain ten-or-less affairs
Avoiding taters and elevators, greeting only empty stairs
Well, it seems to me too much TV will fill you up with fear
And you’ve been advised not to wipe your eyes, even though they’re full of tears

You better stop, look around
Here it comes,
Here it comes,
Here it comes,
Here it comes:
Here comes your Covid-19 Nervous Breakdown

When you were a child you were immunized
But never for this strain
And given pills for fever and chills but never those in your brain
Your mother who neglected the flu owes a million explanations
And your father’s still protecting you from waves of immigration

You better stop, look around
Here it comes,
Here it comes,
Here it comes,
Here it comes:
Here comes your Covid-19 Nervous Breakdown

Oh, who’s to blame? The world’s just insane
Well nothing they do don’t seem to work
It only seems to make matters worse, oh please

When you were still in school you were just a tool and they really messed your mind
They were so concerned that all you learned were words like “peoplekind”
And your first job I always hoped would rearrange your mind
But after a while I realized it was a disease of its own kind

You better stop, look around
Here it comes,
Here it comes,
Here it comes,
Here it comes:
Here comes your Covid-19 Nervous Breakdown

Oh, who’s to blame? The world’s just insane
Well nothing they do don’t seem to work
It only seems to make matters worse, oh please

♩♩♪

Submitted for Your Approval: Natural Selection

Submitted by Gumbeaux:

A Saturday afternoon thought or two, or three.

Just a little humor post on the spur of the moment.

Has the quarantine gotten to anyone yet?

Got a couple of suggestions to stay safe and sane.

 

To deal with toilet paper shortages.

 

Embrace the suck.

Four Darn Good Straight Lines, All in One Article

Mexican Protesters Demand Border With US Be Closed

Yesterday, Arizona Central reported that a group of protesters blocked incoming lanes on the Mexican side of the border checkpoint in Nogales to prevent Americans from coming into the country.

The Trump administration has already closed the borders with Canada and Mexico to non-essential travel, but the protesters in Nogales say not enough is being done to ensure the traffic coming across the border is actually essential. Part of the reason people are so worried about the potential for the virus to spread is that President Andrés Manuel Lopez Obrador has expressed almost no concern about the virus thus far.

President ALMO, as he is known, is the same guy who has taken a similarly relaxed “hugs not bullets” approach to cartel crime. That has been an ongoing disaster so far with Mexico reporting the highest murder rate in its history last year.

The lax approach to the virus finally started to change this week with Mexico’s first social distancing measures put in place Tuesday. However, not everyone has gotten the message. A state governor in central Mexico is telling people the poor are immune to the virus.

Hotair | 03/26/2020 | John Sexton

Straight Line of the Day: Future Archaeologists May Dig Up __________ and Conclude…

Straight Line of the Day: Future Archaeologists May Dig Up __________ and Conclude…

(The science will be settled.)


Best of poll results Saturday Update 3/28/2020

Several of the Best of polls have gone final and here are the results in case you haven’t checked back on them.

Top Cat

Who is the best Top Cat cat?

  • Top Cat (62%, 47 Votes)
  • Benny the Ball (22%, 17 Votes)
  • Brain (7%, 5 Votes)
  • Choo-choo (4%, 3 Votes)
  • Fancy-fancy (4%, 3 Votes)
  • Spook (1%, 1 Votes)

Total Voters: 76

Loading ... Loading ...

 

Bat Girl

Yvonne Craig

Who is the best Bat Girl?

  • Yvonne Craig (80%, 141 Votes)
  • Alicia Silverstone (20%, 35 Votes)

Total Voters: 176

Loading ... Loading ...

Beatle

Who is your favorite Beatle?

  • Who are the Beatles? (26%, 39 Votes)
  • Ringo (25%, 37 Votes)
  • George Harrison (24%, 36 Votes)
  • Paul McCartney (19%, 28 Votes)
  • John Lennon (7%, 10 Votes)

Total Voters: 150

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Gilligan’s Ladies

Mary Ann – Dawn Wells

Who do you prefer?

  • Mary Ann - Dawn Wells (85%, 206 Votes)
  • Ginger - Tina Louise (12%, 29 Votes)
  • Lovey Howell - Natalie Shafer (3%, 8 Votes)

Total Voters: 243

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MST3K Unriffed Movie Progress (or Lack Thereof)

Original, unriffed movies
Original, unriffed movies.

Nearly three years ago, I mentioned that I was watching the unriffed versions of MST3K movies. You know, the movies on MST3K, but without the MST3K riffing. Or shadows.

Now, why would I want to do that? Why not? Who doesn’t love bad movies?

I’ve not made a lot of progress, by the way. I can’t blame it on not having the unriffed movies. I don’t have all 210 of them (counting the Classic Series, the Netflix Series, the KTMA series, and The Movie), but I’m finally making progress.

And, while my collection of 210 MST3K-bad films isn’t complete, I’ve begun watching them. Maybe by the time I watch all I have, I’ll be able to complete the collection. In fact, I have leads on all but three of the missing films. So I have hope.

I am working Monday – Friday, though remote. That cuts down on travel time, leaving more time for the important things. Like watching MST3K-bad movies. And, weekends are pretty much confined to the house right now (I’m noting that’s it’s because of COVID-19, in case I look back on this post in the future and wonder why I was spending so much time in the house).

As of this morning, I’ve only watched 41 of the 210 movies. That’s in three years. I’m gonna pick up the pace now.

I may end up hating myself when this is over.