I think I’ll patent that dish.

Florida restaurant faces backlash after selling pizzas with iguana meat as topping
NY Post | 02/18/2026 | Zoe Hussain

A Florida pizzeria is facing backlash for adding iguana pizza to their menu while a cold snap in the Sunshine State stunned the invasive reptiles, causing them to fall from trees.

My take-out restaurant — “The Slop John B.” — will run commercials with a catchy jingle:

“Iguana go home

(You know) Iguana go home;

Well, they fell so broke up

Iguana go home!”

Have it Uruguay.

Great Overnight Replacement: The Federal Express Decline and Fall of Collierville, TN
Revolver | October 27, 2025 | Karl Hollywood

Conclusion

The story of FedEx’s decline and Collierville’s transformation is a microcosm of a quiet crisis that has been unfolding across the United States for decades, though it has accelerated greatly in the past five years. What began with a change in leadership from founder Fred Smith to CEO Raj Subramaniam has culminated in a vote of no confidence from its pilots, an exodus of loyal customers, and a community in the heart of Tennessee that is now unrecognizable to its lifelong residents.

In addition to which, I think I’ll add “Karl Hollywood” to my list of Witness Protection names.