Straight Line of the Day: Time traveler from the future says: “Oh, that’s right: you’re only up to November 2020. You don’t know about…”
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Bernie the Traveler. He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of 2021, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the 2023 reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!”
…scientist discovering the antibodies in Trump for recovering from the China virus are actually able to kill all harmful human viruses, including Wuhan virus! A single blood pint donation from Trump is able to derive 1 billion doses of vaccine. Liberalism then dies out by the spring of 2021…literally.
… Hank Johnson hunkering down in his attic from the expected tidal wave, after an anonymous colleague leaves him a fake seismograph report of a tsunami from Guam on April 1, 2021. Attached to the report was an SOS from “Skipper Jonas Grumby and 6 others”.
Bernie the Traveler. He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of 2021, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the 2023 reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!”
President Rachel Levine’s mandatory Frankengenitals for all.
… the great Emu invasion of 2021…
I, for one, welcome our new flightless overlords…
I mean, SMoD certainly wasn’t getting the job done…
…the year without a Thanksgiving.
(no one had a recipe for Emu.)
… the Progressive meltdown that made Chernobyl look like a S’mores cookout…
…scientist discovering the antibodies in Trump for recovering from the China virus are actually able to kill all harmful human viruses, including Wuhan virus! A single blood pint donation from Trump is able to derive 1 billion doses of vaccine. Liberalism then dies out by the spring of 2021…literally.
Mandatory Facebook and Twitter accounts for more convenient public shaming
Mandatory government vacuum cleaner attachments for wallets and purses of anyone who voted for Trump
Generalisimo Francisco Franco is still as dead as Democrat ethics
“Oh, that’s right: you’re only up to November 2020. You don’t know about…”
A damned thing. Not. A. Damned Thing.
“Oh, that’s right: you’re only up to November 2020. You don’t know about…”
…”the Spanish Inquisition, part two, renewables electric boogaloo.”
I didnt know that, nor expect it.
“Oh, that’s right: you’re only up to November 2020. You don’t know about…”
“…the rabid hamster invasion.”
Oh “rabid”. I first read it as rabbi.
Could you imagine a hamster bris?
Okay, you probably can now that I mentioned it, and are about to laugh yourself silly filling in the details.
…the Count becoming more popular than Elmo.
“Oh, that’s right: you’re only up to November 2020. You don’t know about…”
“…Harvard scientists cloning Kennedy. Too bad it was the wrong Kennedy.”
(Not to imply there was ever a right Kennedy.)
I wouldn’t mind if they cloned John Kennedy. John Neely Kennedy, the Republican Senator from Louisiana. First Kennedy I can recall ever liking.
… Hank Johnson hunkering down in his attic from the expected tidal wave, after an anonymous colleague leaves him a fake seismograph report of a tsunami from Guam on April 1, 2021. Attached to the report was an SOS from “Skipper Jonas Grumby and 6 others”.
The three shells after the next toilet paper shortage.
The Vicious Chicken of Bristol comes after the murder hornets
…the CDC being introduced to the decimal point. Later on, at the firing squad, they really got the point.
…blanket pardons for election fraud perpetrators.
…how we became the united state.
“Oh, that’s right: you’re only up to November 2020. You don’t know about…”
“… the huge space-time paradox because somebody from the future couldn’t keep his mouth shut. Oh, crap – it’s me!”
//universe ceases to exist//
Aliens…darn it, here of all SLoDs I expected Aliens…I’m not saying it was Aliens, but it was Aliens.
What, too easy for the Moon Nukers? I have the T-shirt, and I am oddly wearing it as I type, but C’mon Man!