New Political Party Names

You ever think that maybe the two parties are too far gone and it’s time to start over? Like, instead of making third parties, we should just agree to disband both the Republican and Democrat parties and start over with brand new parties in their place. What should we name the two parties, though? Here’s a few ideas:


* Freedom Lovers Party and Freedom Is Scary Party

* The Don’t Touch My Stuff Party and the Wussy Whiners Party

* The Guns and Whiskey Party and the Weird Man-Child Party

* The Awesome Party of Awesome and the Mincing Little Sissies Party

* The Don’t Tread on Me Party and the I Have Girl Parts Where Man Parts Should Be Party

* The Rugged Individualist Party and the Please Protect Me Government Because I Don’t Know How to Do Anything Useful Party

* The No Ron Pauls Club and the Commie Pinko Fascist Smelly Hippie Commune

Just a few ideas I had. Got any good new party names?

Send to Kindle
1 Star (Hated it)2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (Awesome) (23 votes, average: 4.57 out of 5)


  1. *So you gotta ask yourself one question, “Do I feel lucky? You’re thinking did he fire 173 times or 174? Well, do you feel lucky, punk?” party and the “I want to lounge on the couch, eating Cocoa Puffs and watching the Cartoon Network All Day” party.

  2. The Hippie Punching Party and the Hippie party
    The Party of Inalienable Rights and the Party of Constitution Stompers
    The Cool Party and the Loser Party
    The Nuke the Moon Party and the Bunch of Pantywaists Party
    The Bull Moose Party and the Field Mouse Party

  3. * The ‘Adults’ party and the ‘Kiddie Table’ party.
    * The ‘BYOB’ party and the ‘Folsom Street’ party.
    * The ‘Finish Your Work Before You Party’ party and the ‘Its not FAIR’ party.
    * The Ant Party and the Grasshopper Party.

  4. Wait, do you mean as they are currently constituted?
    Then they would both be the “We’re better than you party”.

    If it’s as I would like them to be,
    The Ronnie Raygun Party
    The Teh Fred Party.

    One wants low taxes and a gun in every household.
    The other wants a gun in every household and low taxes.

    Both would be a little disappointed it’s been over 50 years since we nuked anybody.

  5. * The America Party and the Not America Party
    * The FREEEEEEEEEEEDOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Party and The Trouble With America Is That It’s Full Of Americans Party
    * The 1972 Miami Dolphins Party and the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers Party
    * The Grownups Party and the I’ll Threaten To Kick Your A$$! Party
    * The Nuclear Ballistic Missile Submarine Party and the Liferaft Party

  6. The “I took a bullet, defeated the Soviet Union, stopped a depression, captured Saddam Hussein, and put really cool lasers in space” Party vs. the “I drowned a girl off of a bridge, caused a depression, gave Iran to the mullahs, got a BJ in the oval office, destroyed the gulf, and wears mom jeans” Party.

    We’ll spend our money party vs We’ll spend your money party.

    hippie face-punch givers vs. hippie face-punch takers.

    Nuke the moon vs. shoot a moon.

  7. The Kiss My Ass Party –vs.– The I Ain’t Kissin’ Your Ass Party.

    Wait a minute…

    Get Your Cotton-Picken’ Hands Off My Wallet Party –vs.– Common Thieves Party. That’s better.

  8. The I ain’t your daddy, get a job hippie! party and the waaaah I smeared my lipstick party.

    The “I got your tax hike, right here! party and the berry gonna buy me a house party.

    The “Hippie sure looked like a moose” party and the “Why does this hat have antlers?” party

  9. the weez freez and the mao bowz
    us and them
    right side ups and upside downs
    the friendlies and the enemies
    the guards and the dee tay knees
    the cooks and the dishwashers
    the cowboys and the indians
    the good and the ugly
    the broom and the dirt
    the flame and the fuel
    the truth and the lie
    the dinosaurs and the dinosaurs with missile launchers

  10. Why even bother with two replacement parties?

    However, my suggestion for names:
    The Big Government Party vs the Gay Marriage Plus Big Government Party
    The “Comprehensive Immigration Reform” Party vs the Amnesty Party
    The AIG Bailout Party vs the Fannie Mae Bailout Party

  11. 1> One party for constitutional moderate, productive people
    who believe in limited government.

    2>Another party for moochers who make a living
    selling their votes to looters who prey on the producers
    and their descendents so they can live
    in a perpetual infancy latched on to the nanny State.

    I think it was a Dennis Miller quip to call them:
    1>Tea Party and
    2>Teat Party.

  12. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » Village Voice Declares IMAO New Poster Child for Intolerance

Leave a Reply