You ever think that maybe the two parties are too far gone and it’s time to start over? Like, instead of making third parties, we should just agree to disband both the Republican and Democrat parties and start over with brand new parties in their place. What should we name the two parties, though? Here’s a few ideas:
NEW NAMES FOR THE TWO MAJOR PARTIES
* Freedom Lovers Party and Freedom Is Scary Party
* The Don’t Touch My Stuff Party and the Wussy Whiners Party
* The Guns and Whiskey Party and the Weird Man-Child Party
* The Awesome Party of Awesome and the Mincing Little Sissies Party
* The Don’t Tread on Me Party and the I Have Girl Parts Where Man Parts Should Be Party
* The Rugged Individualist Party and the Please Protect Me Government Because I Don’t Know How to Do Anything Useful Party
* The No Ron Pauls Club and the Commie Pinko Fascist Smelly Hippie Commune
Just a few ideas I had. Got any good new party names?
There should be no political parties. Every candidate should campaign on and stand for their own ideas, beliefs and principals as individuals, and not tow some party line.
*So you gotta ask yourself one question, “Do I feel lucky? You’re thinking did he fire 173 times or 174? Well, do you feel lucky, punk?” party and the “I want to lounge on the couch, eating Cocoa Puffs and watching the Cartoon Network All Day” party.
The Hall Monitor Party pretty much covers the Left.
The Hippie Punching Party and the Hippie party
The Party of Inalienable Rights and the Party of Constitution Stompers
The Cool Party and the Loser Party
The Nuke the Moon Party and the Bunch of Pantywaists Party
The Bull Moose Party and the Field Mouse Party
“This Is Mine Party” v. “I Want That Party”
“Party of No” v. “Party of Can I Have That?”
* The ‘Adults’ party and the ‘Kiddie Table’ party.
* The ‘BYOB’ party and the ‘Folsom Street’ party.
* The ‘Finish Your Work Before You Party’ party and the ‘Its not FAIR’ party.
* The Ant Party and the Grasshopper Party.
* The ‘Party With All The Guns’ party and the ‘Wet Britches’ party.
The “people who say ‘I need to know who’s ass to kick’ party” and “the people who can actually do it”.
* The ‘Haves’ and the ‘Have Nots And Want Yours’ parties.
The ‘Duty, Honor, Integrity’ party and ‘The Liars’ Club’
Wait, do you mean as they are currently constituted?
Then they would both be the “We’re better than you party”.
If it’s as I would like them to be,
The Ronnie Raygun Party
The Teh Fred Party.
One wants low taxes and a gun in every household.
The other wants a gun in every household and low taxes.
Both would be a little disappointed it’s been over 50 years since we nuked anybody.
* The America Party and the Not America Party
* The FREEEEEEEEEEEDOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Party and The Trouble With America Is That It’s Full Of Americans Party
* The 1972 Miami Dolphins Party and the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers Party
* The Grownups Party and the I’ll Threaten To Kick Your A$$! Party
* The Nuclear Ballistic Missile Submarine Party and the Liferaft Party
The “I took a bullet, defeated the Soviet Union, stopped a depression, captured Saddam Hussein, and put really cool lasers in space” Party vs. the “I drowned a girl off of a bridge, caused a depression, gave Iran to the mullahs, got a BJ in the oval office, destroyed the gulf, and wears mom jeans” Party.
We’ll spend our money party vs We’ll spend your money party.
hippie face-punch givers vs. hippie face-punch takers.
Nuke the moon vs. shoot a moon.
The Allies (Rep) and the Axis (Dem)
The Serious Party and the Silly Party
The Gun-Totin’ Freemen and The Half-Wit Hipsters
Fred Thompson and Not-Fred Thompson
The Party Chuck Norris Is In and Everyone Else.
The Kiss My Ass Party –vs.– The I Ain’t Kissin’ Your Ass Party.
Wait a minute…
Get Your Cotton-Picken’ Hands Off My Wallet Party –vs.– Common Thieves Party. That’s better.
Give Liberty or Give Me Death Party vs. Why Can’t Everyone Just get Along Party.
The I ain’t your daddy, get a job hippie! party and the waaaah I smeared my lipstick party.
The “I got your tax hike, right here! party and the berry gonna buy me a house party.
The “Hippie sure looked like a moose” party and the “Why does this hat have antlers?” party
The Carrying the Nation on Our Shoulders Party and the Selling Out My Neighbors for Cheap Flu Shots Party
the weez freez and the mao bowz
us and them
right side ups and upside downs
the friendlies and the enemies
the guards and the dee tay knees
the cooks and the dishwashers
the cowboys and the indians
the good and the ugly
the broom and the dirt
the flame and the fuel
the truth and the lie
the dinosaurs and the dinosaurs with missile launchers
SCIENCE!
the gun and the done
Preserve and Protect Party vs. Ravage and Plunder Party
Freedom Isn’t Free Party vs. O’Bummer Party
The Rangers Party vs. The Robotics Party
Fred Heads Party and they are The NAMBLA Namby Pambies.
The Makers vs. The Takers
the Life, Liberty, and Prosperity Party versus the Race-baiting Abortionist party
Why even bother with two replacement parties?
However, my suggestion for names:
The Big Government Party vs the Gay Marriage Plus Big Government Party
The “Comprehensive Immigration Reform” Party vs the Amnesty Party
The AIG Bailout Party vs the Fannie Mae Bailout Party
1> One party for constitutional moderate, productive people
who believe in limited government.
2>Another party for moochers who make a living
selling their votes to looters who prey on the producers
and their descendents so they can live
in a perpetual infancy latched on to the nanny State.
I think it was a Dennis Miller quip to call them:
1>Tea Party and
2>Teat Party.
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